


Lay Your Armor Down

by Ahmose007



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: Clone Wars (2003) - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Ahsoka Force-gropes Rex, Ahsoka Tano Needs a Hug, Ahsoka caught masterbating, Anakin Skywalker is a Good Master, Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Armor Kink, Awkward Conversations, Awkward Sexual Situations, Awkwardness, Bad Decisions, Blow Jobs, CT-7567 | Rex Needs a Hug, Caught masterbating, Clone Troopers Speak Mando'a (Star Wars), Come Eating, Confusion, Cunnilingus, Denial of Feelings, Disobeying Orders, Eventual Smut, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fighting Feelings, Fluff and Smut, Forbidden, Forbidden Love, Good Decisions, Good soldiers follow orders, Hand Jobs, Idiots in Love, Inappropriate Behavior, Inappropriate Erections, Inappropriate Use of the Force, Insecurity, Kissing, Lazy Mornings, Lekku Sexual Play (Star Wars), Making Out, Mando'a Language (Star Wars), Mild Hurt/Comfort, Military Kink, Miscommunication, Morning After, Morning Cuddles, Morning Kisses, Morning Sex, Morning Wood, Mutual Pining, Oral Sex, Orgasm, Orgasm Delay, Orgasm Delay/Denial, POV Ahsoka Tano, POV CT-7567 | Rex, Pining CT-7567 | Rex, Protective CT-7567 | Rex, Public Display of Affection, Rex caught masterbating, Rex is really in trouble here, Rexsoka Week, Rexsoka Week 2020, Semi-Public Sex, Sex, Sexual Tension, Sexy Times, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Smut, So much angst, Sorry Not Sorry, Touch-Starved, Touching, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Very awkward situations, alone in a cave, excessive use of Mando'a, hot stuff, masterbating, the great outdoors
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-17
Updated: 2021-03-12
Packaged: 2021-03-15 14:14:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 48,115
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29190612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ahmose007/pseuds/Ahmose007
Summary: Rex and Ahsoka crash their starship get stranded on an unknown planet, with interesting results for both of them. Going for a slow burn fic with this work! There will be lots of smut and hot stuff, but hopefully more angst and inner struggle this time around :) Pretty please let me know your thoughts!
Relationships: CT-7567 | Rex & Ahsoka Tano, CT-7567 | Rex/Ahsoka Tano
Comments: 127
Kudos: 162





	1. Day 1 - The Crash

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own Star Wars or any of it's characters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rex and Ahsoka get stranded on a strange planet when their starship crashes. Both injured, they take care of each other, get to know each other better, and investigate their surroundings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As much as I wish otherwise, I do not own Star Wars or any of it's characters :(

**Rex POV**

_Boom!_

The primary engine exploded. Rex pulled as hard as he could on the control lever, finally managing to heave it into an upright position, diverting all power to the secondary engine and the thrusters. "Commander! See what you can do about the stabilizer!" he ordered over the electric sparks and small explosions in the cockpit. He could see her in his peripheral vision racing to the rear of the cabin to try and fix what she could.

_Boom! Pfft! Bang!_

Smoke was leaking from the cockpit controls this time, spurting out thick grey puffs in large clouds, obscuring any vision out of the windows. " _Haar'chak! Haar'chak!_ _Karking_ _Hell!_ We've lost the drive lock! Were entering the atmosphere, we don't have much time! How's it comin' back there?"

Ahsoka coughed, "Not good! I can't get the lateral stabilizer or the drive lock back online! Brace yourself Rex and I'll try and bring us down as easy as I can!"

"Yes Sir!" He strapped in and checked all fastenings. Not like there was much more he could do at this point anyway, but it rankled him more than a bit to be sitting still during an impending crash. He detested being idle. His mind raced with possible scenarios to fix the situation. They'd lost the primary engine, stabilizer and drive lock, power had been diverted to the secondary engine and thrusters, but that wasn't going to be enough. He shook his head, there _had_ to be something he could do. Then it hit him - maybe they could run the repulsorlift to slow their descent...

He quickly unfastened his harness. "Commander, I'm going to try and run the repulsorlift! It might slow our entry!" 

"Rex, there's _no_ _time!_ Strap in and - "

"I'll make time!" he called as he raced past her, diving into the rear control panel and hurriedly pushing the necessary buttons and activating the correct switches. "Take my seat Commander and strap in!"

He could hear her huff of indignation even over the crackling electrical fire in the cockpit. "That's what I just told _you_ to do!"

"Well, I clearly I'm not doing it, so _you'd_ better take it or neither of us will be be using it!"

"You know, I could order you to take it," she threatened as she strapped in.

Despite their dire situation, that coaxed a chuckle from him. "You could. But there's no need, because we're out of time." And they were. He had gotten the repulsorlift going, and from the looks of things, it was just in the nick of time as he could see the ground fast rising up to meet them. Ahsoka was deep in concentration now, her body trembling as she fought to slow the ship. So far, her efforts hadn't done much to moderate their descent, although she had managed to level it out so they were now coming down belly first instead of nose first, which was a distinct improvement. 

They had seconds left when he felt them slow, but he knew it wasn't going to be enough and he braced as best he could for impact.

The sound when they hit was deafening. He was thrown back, hitting the rear durasteel hull of the ship hard and he was sure he felt at least one rib crack. One of his thighs had scraped hard against a sharp piece of metal jutting out from where the co-pilot's seat had formerly been. But none of that mattered. He could still stand, _barely_ , and he needed to get to Ahsoka. 

He found her still strapped into the pilot's chair, _thank the Maker_ , and stunned. He'd check her for injuries as soon as he was able to make sure she was ok. He unstrapped her, threw her unceremoniously over his shoulder, ignoring the sharp stab of pain shooting down his spine at the movement. He hesitated for a brief moment wondering where to put his hand to hold her there before registering that propriety was the least of his concerns right now. He settled on the small of her back, bracing his hand firmly there and hobbling towards the newly made hole in the side of the ship. He was taking no chances incase of an explosion and wanted to put some distance between them and the smoking and crackling starfighter immediately.

Stepping out of the ship he did a quick scan of the terrain. No hostiles and a landscape thickly shrouded in trees which would offer plenty of cover if needed. He headed directly into the trees, senses heightened as the adrenaline kicked in, alert for any movement around him. His leg was on fire and pain shot down his back like a knife with each step, but he kept a brisk pace. He could rest later. Getting Ahsoka to safety was his priority. He'd made it about 5 clicks west when he felt Ahsoka stir on his shoulder. "It's ok Commander. I've got you."

"W-where are we?" she was groggy and her speech was quiet and wavering. He hoped she didn't have a concussion. Or worse.

"I dunno Sir. This planet wasn't on any of the charts I had access to. All I know so far is that it appears thickly wooded and free of any hostiles." He pulled down his rangefinder for a more in depth scan of their surroundings. About 2 more clicks due south the terrain was much more rocky, offering better cover for them to rest and look over their injuries. He turned in that direction, picking up his pace and pushing any discomfort to the side, as the sun began to set.

He made good time and reached the area before the sun had completely set. Pulling down his rangefinder again he looked for the best location to make camp. As much as he didn't want to travel any further, his rangefinder indicated a cave about a 1/2 click further south and as a bonus it also appeared there was a stream close by. That was certainly better than he'd dared hope for, so he quickened his steps and made it there just as the sun completely sank below the horizon.

Ahsoka had thus far been silent, slumped over his shoulder and, he suspected, passed out either from pain or fatigue. When he entered the cave he immediately found a spot just inside and set her gently down, her back resting against the wall. Continuing to ignore his own injuries, he reached in his belt for his limited medical supplies. Ahsoka's eyes began to flicker open before slowly closing again. Rex lightly shook her shoulders, "Commander?" Her eyes opened again, blinking slowly and heavily. "Commander I need you alert. Just for a few moments. I need you to tell me what your injuries are so that I can treat you."

"Hm? M' fine..." Her eyes were glassy and her eyelids were pressing down, threatening to close completely again. His hands still on her shoulders, he lightly shook her again. Her head rolled back and her eyelids won the battle, closing completely.

" _Haar'chak_ ," he mumbled, scooping her up, her gangly frame so slight she was not much of a burden to carry, although he had to admit it would have been easier without his own painful wounds. With her nestled as comfortably as he could make her against the cold armor of his chest, he surveyed the cave in more detail. Like the small section of this planet that he'd seen so far, it appeared uninhabited. The cave floor was uneven and rocky, but towards the back there was a large, flat area that looked promising for his purposes as a makeshift med bay.

He laid her delicately down on the cold, hard, ground and gave her shoulder a small nudge, jostling it just a bit, watching her reaction closely. Her eyelids endeavored to open, but slipped shut with a small grunt from her lips. "Commander, I'm just going to look over your injuries. You need medical attention Sir." His words were more for himself than for her. Sure he'd treated simple injuries on his brothers during battle, but those times had been rushed, the treatments he'd provided had been simple and really no more than "quick fixes."

But this was _Ahsoka_ , his Commander and his...friend. He let that stray thought rattle around in his mind for a moment, dissecting it. As a clone trooper and even moreso as a Captain in the GAR, he was...well... _strongly_ _discouraged_ might be the best term...to have relationships of any kind. Especially relationships with his commanding officers. But feelings had wormed their way in despite his best efforts to repel them. Anakin had treated him like a...like an _individual_...like he was important as a person and not just some anonymous name, or worse, _no more than a number._ He valued his opinions, asked for his input, and took time to make sure that he and his men were well taken care of and that they all felt included and ,most importantly, _significant_.

And then there was Ahsoka...

The left corner of his mouth hitched up in a crooked grin. Well, she was just something else entirely. Like Anakin, she treated him and his brothers like individuals, but she was... _different_ to him. She sought him out sometimes just to tell him a joke. He was the first one she'd request to have her back in a battle. She would seek him out in the mess hall to eat with him and his brothers. She'd become his friend somehow even more than Anakin. She was a great warrior, caring and energetic, fun and pretty... _no,_ _not_ _just_ _pretty_...she was...he frowned, cutting of that line of thought decisively. Not only were those kinds of thoughts _not allowed_ , but frankly, they were inappropriate and dangerous. 

The crash must have knocked him around more than he'd thought. But he could function, for now, and treating Ahsoka was his most important directive.

He reached into his belt for his medical supplies. He didn't have much, so setting things up didn't take long. He had a shot to dull pain, some wrap, bacta spray, and a few medpatches. That was it. It would have to do.

He shuffled over to Ahsoka, kneeling by her side with the supplies lined up within arms reach. He allowed himself a wince in discomfort, a sharp sting ripping down his side and over his injured leg as he settled onto his knees next to her. He took a deep breath and steeled himself to touch her. His heart was beating so fast all of a sudden. _I have to do this. She needs medical attention_. His hands moved to her head, fingers stretching out to touch her skin. 

Another steadying breath. _This is no different from treating a trooper when they're injured in the field._ He wished she was awake and alert right now. _She was his friend and needed his help_. He removed his gauntlets and gloves. _Gods why was his heart beating so fast_...

His fingertips connected with the impossibly soft skin of her cheek and his breath caught in his chest for a moment. Her skin was so soft. The contrast with the dry, cracked and calloused skin of his hand was dramatic. He felt ashamed, a little guilty maybe, touching her unconscious face with his dirty, scarred fingers, like his unworthy skin might somehow blemish her innocence. Unprompted, his fingers skated over the white marking on her left cheek. It felt silkier, a slightly different texture than the rest of her rich sienna skin. 

That uncomfortable guilty feeling came back, settling like durasteel in his gut, as soon as he realized his indiscretion. Disgusted with himself, he began his examination in earnest. The rest of his fingers gently descending to the sides of her face as he looked her over intently, guiding her head from side to side, pushing and probing as delicately as he was capable of for any injuries or signs of pain. Finding none on her face, his hands moved lower, checking her neck. Nothing he could see or feel so far. Good.

He traced his fingers over her lekku very carefully, not knowing enough about her anatomy and not wishing to hurt her. As he lifted the tips higher to check the underside of the appendage, she shuddered and her hand caught his, stilling his gentle exploration. "Mm...S-Sensitive..." her eyes were still closed and her voice a harsh whisper, but he was relieved to hear it. Her hand slid back down to fall limply at her side, too heavy for her to hold up any longer. 

"I'm sorry Sir," he began awkwardly. _Gods he hadn't known it was sensitive..._ He hoped he hadn't made her upset or uncomfortable. "Y-you were knocked out and I had to..."

"No...need...to...apologize..." he could see the effort it cost her to speak and it pulled at his heart.

"Don't speak any more than you have to Sir. Just tell me where you're hurt and I'll patch you right up."

Her body twinged in agony as she fought to move her arm. He firmly placed his hand over her arm to deny her any further movement of it. "Just tell me. No need to move."

"Left...side. Ribs. Stomach."

"Ok." His voice was even but his insides were churning at the prospect of looking at her... _there_. Of him _touching her_ _there_. But he needed to. He was only doing his duty...

_So why did he feel so anxious?_

"Commander. I, um, I'm going to need to, uh...check...those areas..." _So much for his level, confident voice_. He could feel himself blushing, _thank the Maker her eyes were still closed_. "Is that, uh, alright Sir?" Normally he wouldn't ask for permission to check someone's injuries, but this was definitely not a normal situation. It felt like the right thing to do, to seek her permission before examining her... _there_.

He hoped, _and not purely for medical reasons_ , that she said yes. That thought terrified him.

"Y-yes," a whisper, barely a word, but it was an answer.

She was wearing her maroon battledress. He'd seen her in it a million times. Fought beside her in it. But he felt like he'd never really _seen_ it until now. A simple turtleneck top half tightly bound to her agile body with a keyhole opening in front, displaying just a hint of cleavage... _too much and not enough at the same time_...

_What the karking hell was wrong with him?_

He attempted to shake those thoughts from his reeling brain. She was his _Commander_. Those thoughts were completely _wrong_. 

His mouth was so dry. _As dry as the fucking Tatooine desert_. "H-how..." he cleared his throat, "How do I...open it?" 

She huffed out a short breath, "Neck. Be-behind neck."

His hands were trembling worse than a shiny on his first mission. He supported her neck and head as though she were made of glass, as though fearing a rough touch would shatter her, and he slowly raised her up to a sitting position. A tremor ran through her frame at the new position and her head fell forward onto his chest. He swallowed. One of his arms now wrapped around her bony shoulders and the other made it's way to the back of her neck, peering around to find the clasp as her head lodged in the crook of his neck. 

He unhooked the clasp and began to peel the velvety fabric down. His mind was racing again. Should he just assertively pull it down, or should he be taking his time with this? _Gods this was so wrong_. He shouldn't be in this compromising position. He shouldn't be having these...these... _licentious_ thoughts about Commander Tano. His fingers seemed to be making the decision for him, moving slowly down, down, down. Her shoulders were exposed and he saw no scratches, burns or abrasions. _Only her flawless skin_...

Down, down, down.

He was drowning in the warm, vibrant color of her skin.

He lifted the fabric so gently down and over her breasts, holding his breath. He was both relieved and disappointed that she was wearing a wrap around her chest, preserving her modesty to his impertinent eyes. He let out his breath slowly, unwittingly fanning it across her lekku. He felt her shiver against his chest and he belatedly recalled her comment from just a moment ago... _it was really sensitive_.

In the position he was in right now that was a terrible thought to recall. His body was beginning to react to her proximity... _and her current state of undress_. He tried to push those traitorous thoughts away, but he had no success this time. He forced himself to breathe, silently begging his body to settle down. Now that the fabric had passed her chest, he shifted her body gently back to rest back against the wall.

Down, down, down.

The fabric rested on her hips now. Really, if he thought about it, _which he was really fucking trying not to_ , this wasn't any more skin than he'd seen of hers before. Before she'd changed over to the maroon battledress which she now wore, she'd gone on missions with just a tube top, skirt and leggings. But this felt different. This felt...charged and thrilling and...

_Completely_ _fucking_ _inappropriate_ he reminded himself.

He could see a large gash spoiling the smooth perfection of her stomach now. It ran all the way from the right side of her torso, just under her chest, diagonally across her stomach and down almost to her left hip. It didn't look too deep, but it was long and the area surrounding it was red and angry. It looked as if it was the result of a burn. Maybe an electrical wire had broken off and swiped against her during the crash...

He reached his arms behind her again, holding her as delicately and respectably as his position and her attire would allow, and he laid her softly on the cave floor. He forced his eyes away from her shivering, barely clothed body. He reached for the bacta spray and turned back to her prone form, deliberately holding his gaze on the cut across her midsection. "Commander, this may sting a bit."

"S'okay."

He misted the bacta spray all across the wound. Her abs tensed, reacting to the pain and her arm shot out unexpectedly, her hand gripping his thigh armor and one finger ending up on that small sliver of his black bodyglove that peeked out between his thigh plate and his cod armor. He froze. _Well, this situation just got a whole lot fucking more...sensitive._

His heart was going to beat out of his chest. He kriffing knew it was. She could probably feel its erratic and frenzied beat against that one karking finger.

He forced himself to move. Tried to move like it was no big deal. Like he wasn't harder than he'd ever been in his whole fucking life and her skinny, curious finger wasn't less than a few kriffing inches from it. _Like he wasn't wishing like hell she'd move that finger just those few fucking inches..._

Her hand, and that tantalizing little finger, held their position despite his movement. He grabbed the medpatches and placed them all the way down the scratch. There wasn't much he could do for her broken ribs. Bacta spray would help be some small help and that was really his only option right now so he sprayed a generous amount over her left ribcage. A shiver raced through her body and he was helpless to stop his eyes from landing briefly on her nipples as they hardened under the thin binding around her chest. He should probably have also warned her that it would be cold. He forcefully tore his eyes away.

Next, he needed to place the wrap around her ribs to keep the bacta spray on that area. He picked up the wrap and began to wind it around her body, wary of every move he made, trying to avoid touching her bare skin as much as possible. Once that was done he laid her back against the wall again, her hand finally relinquishing its position on his thigh. He held back a sigh. Whether it would have been from _relief_ at her hand being gone or _regret_ that it was gone would have been up for debate. Probably both.

Last thing to do was give her the shot for pain. "Commander, this will hurt for a second, but it'll ease the pain." He didn't hesitate, placing the shot on her neck, and pushing it in. Her breathing was heavy and he monitored her reactions for a moment. Then a realization hit him. He was a complete di'kut.

_Ah fuck. He should probably replace her dress._

He swallowed again and leaned forward, his arms easing their way around her back. He could have sworn he felt her sigh against him. But he couldn't be sure as way too fucking much of his concentration was occupied with attempting to pull up her dress while making as little contact with her body as possible. That so soft skin. He was being so careful, so impossibly mindful of her wounds as he eased that course fabric over her ribs, the back of his hand accidently brushed across her nipple under within her chest wrap. This time he was sure he heard her gasp.

" _Ah_ _shit_...Sir, I-I'm so sorry. I-I didn't mean..."

"It's ok Rex." Her voice already sounded better. Still a little breathless, but more stable than before.

Now his hands were trembling. As much as from the knowledge of what he'd just done as from the fear that he'd really liked it. _Really, really liked it_.

_And it was so fucking inappropriate._

His body didn't seem very focused on whether it was appropriate or not. His cod armor was now really fucking uncomfortable and there wasn't a karking thing he could do about it.

The fabric was now back up to her neck where it should be. Her head dropped onto his shoulder again as he pitched her forwards just the tiniest bit to reach around and re-set the clasp. Her breathing was still heavy and he hoped the pain shot and the bacta spray would kick in soon so she could rest free of discomfort. Now that she was treated as best as he could manage in these circumstances, _and_ _decently_ _covered_ _again_ , he lowered her carefully to lay down flat on the cave floor. He didn't have a cover or anything for her to keep warm and the night air brought a sharp chill with it. He tucked her body against the wall so that the stone could buffet the breezes while he figured out a plan.

He checked his wristcom to signal Anakin but only small sparks emanated from it. _Ah Sithspit_. It must have been damaged in the crash as well. He reached out to check Ahsoka's and while it wasn't sputtering out smoke or sparks, it wasn't working either. He took a deep steadying breath and closed his eyes. _Of course neither comlink was functional_. Because that was just how this day was going to go. He ran his hand across his short blonde fuzz. _Well, no use dwelling on it_. He sprang to his feet, immediately regretting the action as he hunched forward in agony. 

He needed to focus or his ribs and leg were going to be a problem. And the last thing he needed right now was another problem. He hobbled carefully to the cave entrance, discerning with each step the best ways to move without exacerbating his wounds. He glanced over his shoulder at Ahsoka, resting so peacefully now, one hand under that smooth cheek as a makeshift pillow and the other nearby on the cave floor by her head. His mouth stretched into a small smile at the image. Now he had a tightness in his chest as well as his codpiece.

He didn't want to leave her there, but he needed to find food and water if he could. He wasn't planning to go far, and really she should be fine, but it felt wrong to leave her alone, so vulnerable and unprotected like this. He took another deep breath, letting it out slowly to hiss through his vocoder and stepped out of the cave.

Dropping his rangefinder with his body blocking the cave entrance he took his time analyzing his surroundings this time. All appeared as before, only dark now since the sun had dropped below the horizon. No sign of any unfriendlies and quiet. _Too quiet_. A rustle in the leaves about 100 feet to his right made his ears perk up. He turned, quick as lightning, but probably too quick for his broken ribs. He grunted as the now familiar burning shot through his body but he held his pistol mercifully still and pointed at the noise. It was a small pikobi. He shot it in the head and dropped it with one well-aimed blast. It would give them food for the night and probably some tomorrow as well if needed, which, if neither of them could get their coms working, they would likely need. He ambled over to it, hoisted it on his shoulder, and began lugging it back to the cave entrance. 

He dropped it unceremoniously in front of the cave entrance and poked his head in to check on Ahsoka. She was in the same position he'd left her in, still resting in that tranquil pose he'd last observed. Satisfied, he ducked out again and headed for where he knew the stream was. Thank the Maker he had a waterskin in his utility belt. It wasn't big, but at least it was something. The stream was about a 1/2 click away from the cave and he hated to go that far, but it was necessary. He hastened his pace, hurrying to the stream, which he found without issue. He swiftly filled the waterskin, attached it to his belt and loaded up his arms with the best candidates for firewood and made his way back to the cave. 

Checking on Ahsoka one more time before getting to work, he noted that she was still in that same restful position, the gentle rise and fall of her chest testifying that she was deep in her REM cycle now. His mouth quirked up again in his trademark half smile as he allowed himself a moment to monitor her. He was glad to see that at the very least she was comfortable for the moment, no pain bothering her and the medicine he'd applied being given a chance to work on her injuries while she slept.

He turned back outside and got to work, ignoring the now chilling wind and the various aches in his body. Ahsoka would need something to eat when she awoke and he'd do his best to have it ready. He'd be fine; he could take care of himself later. He hauled everything he'd collected inside the cave for now and busied himself building a fire and skinning the pikobi to cook. Before long, he had the fire going and the pikobi impaled on a stick suspended over it, cooking nicely. 

Knowing they'd need more firewood to get through the night, he crept quietly out one last time, again grunting in irritation as another sharp sting raced through down his spine, protesting his movements. He again shoved his discomfort to the side, compartmentalizing it in his mind with the many other things from today he'd deal with at some more convenient time. 

**Ahsoka POV**

_Something smells like it's burning_. 

Oh no! The starship...the crash...Rex!

She jerked her body up to a sitting position, realizing too late that this was a bad idea. There was pain like she couldn't ever remember feeling shooting across her midsection and when she screamed in agony, her ribs felt like they were stabbing her right in the lungs for her outburst. Eyes glued shut, she let the crescendo of stabbing, twinging, and stinging, wash over her, willing it to end. A strong hand on her shoulder brought her back to reality. She knew that hand. _Thank the Maker he's ok_.

"It's ok Commander. You're gonna be ok."

"W-what happened? I remember the crash but not much else. Where are we? I smell something burning..."

" _Ah_ _fuck!_ The pikobi!" He released her shoulder in a hurry and stumbled over to a firepit with some animal cooking, no, _burning_ , over it. She didn't miss the grimace that overtook his face at his sudden movement to stand and make his way to the fire. "Sir, I-I'm sorry, I meant..."

She smiled. He was cute when he was flustered, his face twisting into an expression that would have made her chuckle if she didn't know that he was genuinely worried about offending her. "It's just me. You can curse in front of me."

He returned her smile, as much with relief as with sincerity. That half smirk of his was really cute.

She braced her hands on either side of her body and slowly and very carefully this time, hauled herself up to a semi-comfortable sitting position. Rex was adjusting the animal on the makeshift spit and looking at her like he was fighting the urge to race over and adjust her himself. She flashed him another small smile, he really was such a good man...such a good friend, always there for her and always putting her first. 

"Ok Rexter, care to fill me in on what's been going on while I was sleeping?"

"Well Commander, after the ship..."

" _Ahsoka_. Call me Ahsoka when it's just you and me."

For some reason that seemed to make him uncomfortable. She watched his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed, looking like he was trying hard to hide his reaction from her. He was pretty rigid and formal, but it shouldn't bother him to use her name when it was just the two of them. The likelihood that anyone would ever know that he didn't address her as Commander or Sir in this situation was certainly nil. She didn't want to make him anxious, but she couldn't really comprehend his worry about it. 

He had busied himself with his burning animal, collecting himself before trying again. "A-Ahsoka. Um." Poor guy, her request had really thrown him off. "The ship crashed and I got you out and brought you here. It seemed like the safest place to regroup. You were injured in the crash so I, um, treated your wounds as best I could..." Now he was looking _really_ discomfited. He was avoiding her gaze. Actually, he was avoiding looking at her at all and if she wasn't mistaken... _was he_...

_He was..._

_Blushing_ _?_

Her thoughts had broken away from his attempt to recount of the series of events that had led them to this moment and all she could focus on was the fact that Rex...strong, levelheaded, infallible _Rex_ was _blushing._

_But why?_

Then it all came back to her. Hit her as hard as durasteel. Her injuries. _On her ribs and stomach_. She lifted her arm with much effort and felt the bandages. She only vaguely remembered him treating her. It had felt like a dream, his hands wrapping around her, tugging her dress down. His hands on her...

She shivered and realized that he was watching her. _Intensely_. His eyes boring into hers, searching for something, she wasn't sure what. Her throat suddenly felt so dry. 

A sudden spark from the fire snapped her out of her trance. The moment was broken. He returned to roasting, or attempting to roast, the pikobi and she shook her head trying to clear her now racing thoughts. 

She stood, with less difficulty than she'd expected, and his eyes snapped back over to her. He stood as well and rushed to her, placing his arm gently but firmly on her shoulder and guiding her back to a sitting position. She huffed, "I can stand. I feel much better now." He raised one eyebrow at her. "Honestly! I swear I feel much better."

"Sir, you really need to rest, y-"

" _Ahsoka_."

"Sorry...Ahsoka...but you really do need to-"

"I don't want to hear it Rex. I can't just sit here and do nothing. And you should talk! Don't think I can't tell that you're hurt."

"It's nothing."

She rolled her eyes at him. With a response like that, he was probably hiding a very serious injury that he didn't want her to know about. "I'll make you a deal Rexster." His lips twitched into a smile and he cocked his head slightly to the side. Her stomach began to churn at that look. She swallowed. "Let me take care of your injuries and I promise to rest the remainder of the night with no complaints." She crossed her arms for emphasis.

He froze, that playful smirk melting from his lips as quickly as it had come. "No. I can treat my own injuries. It's nothing really. I'll get to it after dinner. Promise."

She stood up and he promptly made a move towards her in an effort to sit her down again. She held her hand up, effectively halting his progress, "Well, then I guess I won't be sitting still tonight."

He sighed in exasperation. "Counter offer. I treat my own injuries, but I'll treat them now. You can sit here and make sure this doesn't catch on fire in the meantime."

Her face split into a wide grin, "Deal!" She cautiously made her way to Rex, taking her time with each step and finding a stride that wasn't too painful. She could feel his eyes on her, as watchful as she was, gaging any signs of discomfort. "I promise Rex, I really do feel much better now." She reached him and she lifted her eyes to his, "Your treatment is working great."

And then she felt it again, as soon as their eyes connected. That swoop in her stomach. His golden eyes were glowing in the firelight, holding her gaze, alight with _something_ she couldn't quite place but that hit her low in her gut. She had a strong, unexpected impulse to touch him. His look felt...charged... _electric_...filled with potential for things she didn't dare to contemplate. Her hand began to lift, to what purpose she had no idea, she just knew that she needed to reach...

He stepped back, dropping his eyes to the fire now between them. "I'll get to work on my injuries." She felt so cold all of a sudden without that heat from his eyes. He turned and headed towards the rear of the cave, standing close to where she herself had been just moments ago and she heard him commence removing his armor. She wanted to say something. What, she didn't know, but she wanted to speak. Maybe to call him back. Maybe to tell him he was right to walk away. But the moment was past now. The spark fizzled out.

Her body felt so heavy. She sat and began to stoke the fire. She heard more movement in Rex's corner of the cave and she stole a glance in his direction. She may have thought she was prepared, but Force help her _she_ _wasn't._

He was shirtless. His arms were raised, muscles flexing like it was no big deal, like he had no kriffing idea how sexy this was, as he tugged the upper half of his blacks over his head. Sure, she'd seen the occasional clone shirtless before. Seen Rex shirtless before even. But _Stars_ this was different. Maybe it was because of that spark a moment ago. Maybe it was because of the warm glow of the firelight. Maybe it was because, now, looking at him, _like that_ , all shirtless and perfect and somehow _vulnerable_ too, it felt...right and wrong at the same time. Forbidden and tempting and so wrong to be thinking about right now but _oh_ _she_ _was_. She couldn't help it. 

It was like he _felt_ her eyes on him. Who knows, he probably did because she wasn't being discreet in her observations like she _knew_ she should be. His eyes locked on hers again. _Why was it all of a sudden so hot in here?_

"I'm sorry Sir...A-Ahsoka. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

She fleetingly wondered what her eyes had disclosed to make him think that. "Rex, _I'm_ sorry. I shouldn't have been staring."

He chuckled at that, "There's nothing to stare at. I'm sure you've seen clones shirtless before. I'm nothing special." _He meant it_. And that rankled her more than she could put into words.

She got up and walked towards him, the burnt pikobi forgotten. He was reaching for the bacta spray, paying her no mind, convinced that his statement had ended their conversation. When he turned around with the spray, she was right next to him. "Ahsoka!" He sounded startled, worried and just the tiniest bit anxious at her proximity.

"Rex, you are special." She really needed him to understand.

His eyebrows furrowed, his eyes were darting anxiously between her own. She could see his naked chest rise and fall rapidly as his breathing increased. And all at once it was back. All of those feelings she couldn't process. That she wasn't brave enough to explore. Her own breathing sped up. "Let me help you." His eyes continued to flit between hers and she could see him struggling with his answer. "Please." He froze. 

Her fingers whispered across his as she claimed the bacta spray from his still hand. "Who's going to watch our dinner?"

She smiled, "I think it's plenty done." She waved her hand and took it off the spit with the Force, laying it gently down near the warmth of the fire. "Now, where are you injured."

"You don't have to do this." He sounded resigned and...tense?

"I know. I want to."

They were standing so close now and even this far away from the fire her body felt like it was burning. "Ok." The way he said it...so low and gravelly and... _oh_ _Force_ her stomach was in knots right now and she felt...things she'd never felt before. 

"W-where are you hurt?" Her voice wasn't much more than a breath. She felt him tense, watched his muscles twitch and harden. 

"Ribs. right side." She moved to his right side and sprinkled the bacta spray over his ribs. She was completely mesmerized with the way his abs tightened, the way his defined arms flexed as the spray hit his torso.

She reached past him for the wrap. Her hand tentatively lifted up to place it where she wanted it on his chest, and his own hand shot up to meet hers, seizing her wrist. In her new position with her hand on his chest, she could feel his heart palpitating, so wildly she was worried for a moment. Until she registered that her own was thumping just as fast. She swallowed deep, too apprehensive to raise her eyes to meet his, unsure of what she would see there. Equal parts of her hoping and fearing what she might encounter.

As if in slow motion, she delicately met his gaze. _Force_... _his eyes_...

They looked tortured, fearful yet _wanting_. Smoldering. He dropped his eyes to their hands so quickly she wondered if she'd just imagined what she'd seen. What she'd felt.

"I can hold this." His voice was rough, stoic, shielding her from his feelings.

She didn't press him, "O-ok." Her hand retreated to join her other as she wrapped the bandage around him, surrendering the other end of the bandage to him when she was finished, watching him tuck it into place.

Surprising herself with her daring words but fully committing to them, she waded out further into these dangerous waters they were swimming in, "Anywhere else?" This close she heard him suck in a quick breath, resolutely avoiding her eyes, unmoving and solid as though he were made of the same rock as the cave wall. He had to be feeling this too. It was permeating their space, thick and heavy, enveloping them both.

"I can take it from here Commander." His tone was almost harsh. Unyielding and leaving no room for argument. But it was the use of her title that hit her the hardest. Like he'd just thrown a bucket of ice water over her head. It made her sad, hurt, and irritated all at the same time. If he wouldn't have defied her by bringing rank back into this... _whatever this was_...she might have let him get away with it. But now she was offended and defiant, willing to challenge him and finish what she'd requested.

"No."

His eyes did meet hers now. They were searching again, she realized. Trying to discern her sudden hostility. And more than a little unsettled. They darted away as quickly as they'd connected, "You don't understand...Ahsoka...it's, um," he was looking distinctly embarrassed now, "It's on...on _my thigh_..." He was mortified at having to tell her this, "I can get it, you've done enough. Trust me, you've already done plenty...more than you-"

"It's ok Rex." She _knew_ she was playing with fire right now. _Knew_ she might get burnt. "We're both adults."

He scoffed at that and it set her off. There was no reason she couldn't help him with his injury... _no matter where it was_... They were both adults...sort-of...and there was no reason they couldn't do this professionally. "Ahsoka...I appreciate your desire to help... _I do_...it's just that-"

She wasn't letting him out of it. Not anymore. "I've got this _Captain_." That stopped him dead in the middle of his entreaty. She tried again, more gently, "Please Rex. _I want to help you_. You took care of me earlier. Let me do the same for you." She noticed his hands had fisted at his sides and the intensity of that gesture frightened her a bit. Maybe she was overstepping here. She didn't really want to make him angry...

"Ok," he surrendered, his voice shaky and strained.

She moved back towards him, a little hesitantly. Now that she'd won her battle she wasn't sure at all where to begin. She dropped to her knees. _Should she pull down his pants?_ That thought made her insides squirm and she felt wet heat blossom between her legs. _Should she ask him to remove them?_ That didn't sound much better. She was about to relent and concede that he could treat it himself after all just to save herself this awkwardness, when he solved her quandary for her, hooking his fingers confidently into the waistband of his blacks and tugging them down past his hips. 

It didn't occur to her that he wouldn't have underwear on beneath his blacks, but he definitely didn't. If she thought about it, it made sense. His blacks were insulated, they were a thick protective fabric, why would he really need anything under that? But clearly she _hadn't_ thought about it and now she was fully obligated to this situation she'd created. _No wonder he'd been so panicked by her request_.

She caught a blurred glimpse of... _him_...before he covered himself with his shirt. _Oh Force_ _what had she gotten herself into?_

Ignoring what was right in front of her, hiding beneath his makeshift covering, the insides of her thighs sticky now, she compelled herself to focus on the task at hand. She could see the gash on his right thigh, large and gaping, inflamed and irritated. It looked utterly _excruciating_ and she couldn't imagine how he had made it this long without treating it. "Force Rex!" she exclaimed.

He didn't say anything, his thick thighs tensing, muscles bunching as he shifted his position slightly. She tried not to ogle those powerful thighs...and _of_ _course_ completely ignoring what was between them...

Without wasting any more time, not wishing to make this situation any more awkward than it already was, she spritzed the bacta spray on the deep laceration, watching as he tensed again, those leg muscles pulled taut against the sting. "Sorry Rex," she whispered. More mindful of her movements than she'd ever been in her life, she reached around his leg, her grip fumbling briefly as she clutched the medpatches. 

She fortified her resolve and smoothed the medpatch along the jagged wound, her fingers brushing accidently against his skin. She felt as though she'd been shocked, like a bolt of pure electricity had jolted through down her spine to settle in her groin, where she felt more wetness leaking out. _Force_. _This situation was really dangerous right now._ Once the slash was covered with the medpatch, she rose shakily back to her feet. 

She could practically _hear_ his heart threatening to burst from his chest and she knew she wasn't much better. She needed to put some distance between them and fast. She peeked up at him through her eyelashes, just curious to see his reaction. _Was he in the same state she was?_ His eyes could have been a weapon: they cut through her like a lightsaber. Naked desire. Completely raw and ramming into her harder than their starship crash this afternoon. She could feel it like some palpable force, like a living thing, so real and inviting and... _so, so forbidden_.

She backed up a step and let her eyes fall, releasing the spell they'd both been under. "A-all done Rex." 

"Thank you _Ahsoka_." The way he said it...she almost re-claimed that step she'd just retreated, back into his space and back into the danger. But she didn't. She turned, offering him that delicate privacy she'd usurped moments ago.

Once he was dressed, they attempted to eat the pikobi, which was sinewy and definitely charred but not inedible. She suspected they were both trying to ignore what had just passed between them. She didn't want to push it all aside, didn't want things to be uneasy between them, but she didn't know what to say or do to achieve this. The air felt heavy with things left unsaid, with missed opportunity. They ate in silence until she couldn't take it anymore and went out on a limb, "So, what happens next?" She realized too late that she should have probably phrased that differently and she hoped she didn't just make things worse.

He paused, a bite halfway to his mouth and looked thoughtful, "I'd recommend we make camp here tonight. In the morning, we can make our way back to the ship and see what's salvageable. With any luck, we can patch through to Anakin or the rest of the fleet and let them know the situation here. Worst case scenario, we recover anything useful and we try and find an alternate way to reach them."

"That's a good plan Rexster."

He graced her with a small smile at the use of her nickname for him. "I'll take watch tonight. You rest."

"No way, you've done so much more than me today already! I can-"

"I thought the deal earlier was that you'd rest with no arguments or complaints?" he teased, one eyebrow raised challengingly. Her face pinched together in indignation and annoyance at his memory of their agreement and he chuckled. She would have pressed her case, but they were back on companionable footing with limited embarrassment and she refused to tarnish that so she reluctantly surrendered this round to him.

"Alright, you win." She winked at him, " _This time_."

He rewarded her with a full belly laugh this time. "Hey, I'll take what I can get Comm-Ahsoka."

The rest of the meal passed in comfortable silence. Not like before where it felt like a potential minefield, but truly easy and relaxed. Once they were finished with dinner, she headed back towards the rear of the cave, claiming a spot close to where he'd treated her injuries this afternoon and laying down as comfortably as she could on the hard rock floor. She wondered where he'd sleep but she was afraid to ask. She didn't want to disturb the delicate peace they now shared but infusing it with any further compromising innuendos.

Her question was answered as he carved out a space for himself across the floor from her, nestled against the opposite wall. His back to her, she watched, _she couldn't help it_ , as he peeled his bodyglove from his torso again, muscles rippling across his shoulders and further down...

He turned to face her and she hastily arranged her face in what she hoped was a nonchalant and innocent expression. His quirked eyebrow told her she hadn't entirely succeeded. He tossed the shirt to her. "It's already chilly and I suspect temps will drop further overnight. This'll keep you warm." It was such a magnanimous gesture it warmed her heart and she smiled at him. She opened her mouth to reply and it's like he was reading her mind, "Don't. I'll be fine. You need it more than I do."

It was indeed warm and it smelled like him. Like GAR issue soap, blaster residue and sweat, and something uniquely him. She willing draped it over her small frame and was asleep within minutes. His eyes watching her again as she curled up under his shirt. With compassion, with caring, with a _yearning_ that was the last thing she felt as she drifted off. 


	2. Day 2 - Stranded

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rex and Ahsoka realize they are stranded, unable to contact the GAR. Rex's re-opens his wound and Ahsoka takes a chance!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Star Wars or any of it's characters
> 
> Thank you TabbyWolf for the Inappropriate use of the Force suggestion, which inspired my Ahsoka POV in this chapter!
> 
> Thank you to sushifish for looking this over before I posted it and giving me your wonderful input!

**Rex's POV**

As the sun crept up over the far horizon, he tried to take a moment to appreciate it. It wasn't often he was gifted with time to himself - not fighting, not training, just having time to himself. In fact, he couldn't remember  _ ever  _ having time like this to himself. He shouldn't really be having time to himself right now either. The cloudless sky was painted a rich reddish orange now.  _ Like Ahsoka's skin, _ he thought. He shook his head. He needed to stop thinking about her like that. Needed to stop thinking about her smooth skin, her agile body... _ her hands on his thigh _ ... 

He audibly groaned. He'd put his armor back on after Ahsoka had drifted off to sleep last night and it had been on ever since. Well, the bottoms at least as she was still sleeping under his shirt. If she hadn't seen enough last night, he wasn't about to wreck their friendship any further with an ill-timed erection pointed in her direction under his blacks. Ever since she'd...treated his injuries...he'd had a stiffie he couldn't shake. And it was still kriffing here this morning, poking at his cod, because he refused to take care of it and because every time it waned and he thought it would go away completely, his treacherous mind would resurrect a memory from last night that brought it back to full attention. There were so many memories to choose from, his brain wasn't lacking in material. And the result was a very uncomfortable Captain Rex. He probably should just take care of it. They had a lot to do today and the last thing he needed to be worrying about was a really fucking inappropriate boner. 

He chanced a glance inside the cave and saw Ahsoka still slumbering peacefully, the weight of the world no longer on her slim shoulders, as her chest gently rose and fell. He was still debating with himself.  _ Should he?  _ She was very clearly soundly asleep and it wouldn't take him long with all the ammunition his mind was reeling with right now... 

_ Pop! _

Off came his codpiece. He sighed in relief. He lightly stepped outside of the cave entrance and around the side, favoring his still tender thigh. He found a good spot in the trees just to the side of the cave, where he could see if anyone or anything approached the entrance, but where he'd have some modicum of privacy for this. He wasted no time in pulling himself out, feeling the odd combined sensations of disgust in himself and the excitement at the prospect of a pleasure he hadn’t granted himself in he couldn't remember how long. 

He stroked firm and fast, just needing to get this done so he could function today. He allowed his eyes to slip shut, recollections of last night flooding his senses and coaxing precum to leak out of his hard and ready cock. He pumped faster, his breath now coming in pants as he let his mind linger this time on the image of her hands on his thigh.  _ What would she have done if he'd dropped that shirt? Would she have touched him? _ He didn't get any farther in his introspections as his abs clenched and unclenched, his thigh muscles tightened in need and he was sure he felt his wound re-open.  _ Just karking great _ . The pain didn't deter him as he climaxed,  _ really fucking hard, _ releasing all of his pent up desire from last night in that cave all over the forest floor, watching it spurt and drip down into an alarmingly large viscous white puddle an impressive distance from his feet. 

His breathing slowly returned to normal as he milked out every last drop of his seed, savoring the relief and brief satisfaction that washed over him. As his body reclaimed its traditional stoic state, albeit more relaxed, his self-loathing also re-asserted itself.  _ What was wrong with him? _ He'd  _ never _ had so little control of his mind and body than he had right now. He'd been trained by the best of the best. To be a good soldier. To follow orders. To withstand any stress or situation.  _ So why couldn't he handle this? _

He'd been by Ahsoka's side ever since Anakin had first taken her on as his Padawan. He'd grown fond of her as a friend very shortly after that, maybe even on that same day if he thought about it. So what the kriffing hell happened between then and now to make him come apart like this? 

He  _ had _ thought about her before this. Had thought of what it would be like if they could be something more. Had wondered if she could ever feel the same. He'd fought those feelings when they'd appeared, just as he was fighting them now. 

_ He wasn't allowed _ . Wasn't allowed to feel those things and certainly wasn't allowed to  _ act _ on those feelings. As if to punctuate his thoughts, he tucked himself back into his blacks and snapped his codpiece back on. 

He just needed to find a way to stop thinking about her like that. And it would probably help if they got off this kriffing system sometime soon. Time alone in a secluded cave with her wasn't going to help his situation. They needed to get moving, make their way back to the crash site and see if they'd be able to make contact with Anakin or anyone in the GAR who might be able to rescue them. 

He looked back at the sun, now fully risen and claiming its place low in the sky and he sighed. It still reminded him of her skin. 

He re-entered the cave to find Ahsoka awake and sitting up, looking groggily around.  _ Haar'chak that was close. _ Thank the Maker he'd finished when he did. Her eyes found his and she smiled at him, warm and bright, "Morning Rexster." She tossed him his shirt and he tried not to stare at the rumpled fabric of her battledress that had ridden up while she was sleeping. 

He returned her smile, both sides of his mouth hitching up for this one as he pulled his shirt on, "Morning Com...Ahsoka." 

She gave just the tiniest little huff at that, "Is it really that hard to call me Ahsoka?" 

"No, it's just a tough habit to break: calling you Sir or Commander. They drill the importance of respect and chain of command into you pretty hard on Kamino." 

She looked thoughtful at that, but whatever she was thinking she kept to herself for the moment. A loud rumble broke the silence and they both laughed as Ahsoka gingerly rubbed her stomach. 

"I take it you're hungry, eh kid?" He pulled out one of the precious few ration bars he had in his belt and made his way carefully over to her, trying to bend and hand it to her, before raising up again with a pained grimace and a controlled exhale, tossing it to her instead. "Eat this. It's not much, but it'll hold you over until we can make our way to the crash site. Hopefully there'll be some stores and maybe a comm we can salvage." She was watching him closely, her eyes drifting to his injured thigh. Correctly interpreting her thoughts, he interjected, "It's fine. I just might have, uh, accidently opened it up this morning. By accident. But it's fine-I'll be fine-" 

"How'd you do that just watching the cave entrance?" 

_ Ah fuck _ .  _ He was  _ **_not_ ** _ having to explain this right now _ . 

"I'd stepped outside for a minute...to... _ uh _ ...check out the... area."  _ Well that wasn't completely untrue _ . "You know, make sure the immediate vicinity was, uh, ok, and, um, safe..."  _ Why was he still talking right now? _

Her eyes narrowed a bit and she cocked her head to the side, discrediting his account with just a look. "Uh-huh. I'm not buying that, Rex. What  _ really  _ happened?" 

_ Ah fuck. Fuck, fuck,  _ **_fuck_ ** **.**

He was not used to lying and this was a horrible spot to be in. He very obviously swallowed hard, trying to draw some moisture back into his dry throat. He hadn't completely lied in his previous attempted explanation...just maybe colored his story with his choice of words to make it plausible that his reason for being gone was _absolutely_ _anything_ other than what he'd actually been doing. 

But it was no good. She had pursed her lips now, not comprehending why he might lie to her about something as stupid as ducking out for a minute and mysteriously re-opening that damn gash on his thigh. He had to say something, but Gods help him it wasn't going to be the full truth. 

"I stepped out for a minute..." She raised one white eyebrow marking witheringly at him, "I needed..."  _ Well, Ahsoka, I needed to get myself off because what happened last night was so karking hot I can't see straight anymore _ . "Needed to take a minute to myself. Um, just needed a minute alone, you know?" She looked a little hurt at that.  _ Ah, great. I'm only making things worse _ . He sighed a little in irritation at this situation. He  _ couldn't _ tell her the truth. Not with this. But maybe he could hint at it and she'd let it drop. He really,  _ really _ didn't want to, but he didn't know what else to say at this point. "Uh...personal time...Sir."  _ Please let it drop. Please, please let it drop because I really can't elaborate right now _ . He was so embarrassed, he knew, just  _ knew _ , that his cheeks had tinged red. His eyes had long ago left hers to catalogue all of the cracks and crevices in the cave floor around him and he was reluctant to raise them now. But he needed to know if this confession was finally enough and he could die in peace. Just melt right into those long gouges in the cave floor and never have to deal with this again. 

Her eyes widened comically. Her mouth had come unglued just the slightest bit, her bottom lip hanging just a little down in surprise. It would have been really funny if it was any other situation.

She blinked, swallowed and finally put him out of his misery, "Rex, I'm sorry...I shouldn't have pushed you to tell me..."  _ Ah fuck now she was blushing _ . Blushing really deeply, her cheeks a burnt red that somehow even made her more beautiful right now. Not that he was thinking about how beautiful she was. Nope, definitely not. "I was just worried about your...um, injury and wanted to make sure you were ok." Now she was biting her lower lip and the effect was impossibly more embarrassing and painful than anything so far today as his cock sprang obstinately to life again, pressing hard against his tight codpiece. He bit back his groan of frustration.  _ She had absolutely no idea what she was inadvertently doing to him _ . 

"Are you ok?" she asked with genuine concern. He knew she couldn't see anything with his armor on, but a small part of him still worried she knew what was happening with his body right now. 

"Yeah."  _ He shouldn't ask... _ "Why?" 

She was biting her lip again, her eyes falling to his thigh before lifting back up to his face, "Your leg. I can tell it hurts you right now. We should-" 

"No, no, no, no, not  _ we _ ,"  _ Sithspit!  _ She really looked hurt now. His head dropped and he forced himself to think about his next sentence before just spitting it tactlessly out like a di'kut, "I’m sorry Ahsoka. I mean, given the circumstances,"  _ she really had no idea...at least he hoped not...of what circumstances he was referring to right now _ , "I think it's best that I treat it this time." 

"I understand Rex. Just...let me know if...um, if I can help you...at all..." she concluded her sentence in such a small voice he almost didn't catch it.  _ Almost. Ah Gods, you have no idea how much I want your...help. _

He didn't reply.  _ He couldn't _ . His cock was rock hard and throbbing now, jammed inelegantly against his armor and struggling for attention. So much for that quick polish this morning. He was right back to square one, uncomfortable, incredibly aroused, and more than a little humiliated with all of it. This morning had started out so well with that sunrise... 

He made his way to the back of the cave, his step now hitching awkwardly, and now not solely because of his wound. He wasted no time in removing his armor from the waist down. He reached for the medpatches and realized that there was only one left. His hand changed course and grabbed the bacta spray. That would have to do. Ahsoka would need the other medpatch tonight. He clamped his eyes shut against the sting as the spray hit his skin. The only good thing about the sensation was its success at partially smothering his body's earlier enthusiasm. 

He could feel her eyes on him and the thought that she might be staring at him again swiftly undid his best efforts to quell his arousal. There wasn't a kriffing thing he could do about it right now, even if he wanted to, so he grit his teeth and kitted back up. When he turned to face her, she was looking at the ground. Maybe it had just been wishful thinking that she'd been watching him. "Ready to move out, Ahsoka?" 

"Yes." She sounded faraway. 

With things tense and awkward enough, he didn't press her. If she needed "personal time" he didn't think he could handle it. 

"Ok, let’s head out." 

He helped her up, ignoring the warmth that flowed from her hand into his, sending a tingle to his heart. As they made their way out of the cave, he noticed her wrap her arm around her middle and her face twist in discomfort. He stopped and swiveled to fully face her. "Ahsoka, why don't you stay here and rest? I can make my way-" 

"No way, Rex! I'm fine. And you're more injured than I am! If anything,  _ you _ should stay here while I go back to the ship." 

He chuckled at her fiery protest, "Ok, ok, easy kid. I just want to make sure you're ok and that you have a chance to heal." 

She pushed forward at a steady pace, both of her hands now at her sides. She cocked her head at him and raised one white eyebrow marking, "And what about you? What about your injuries? I mean, you just re-opened the one on your leg this morning."  _ Ah fuck. Yeah, thank you, Ahsoka; I remember _ . "Shouldn't  _ you _ be resting?" 

"Well, I'm not as important as you. And besides, I'm used to pushing through injuries to get the job done. I was bred to do my duty, to follow orders, whether I'm hurt or not." 

Her eyes narrowed a bit at that. "Rex, you  _ are _ as important as I am." 

He chuckled again at the absurdity of that. She was looking at him so intensely though it made him nervous, his hand rubbing along his blond buzzcut as his eyes broke free of hers, "Well, I appreciate the thought, but to the Republic I'm just a clone. I'm expendable. _You_ most certainly _are_ _not_." 

"Well, you're not expendable to me Rex." She was serious. It did something really strange to his stomach. His eyes swiftly dropped to the ground, suddenly completely riveted by every branch in his path. He wanted to say thank you, to say even more, but every time he opened his mouth, nothing came out. 

They made their way in companionable silence, setting a decent pace all the way to the ship. As they finally emerged from the treeline, the ship loomed before them, relatively in one piece, a small fire still burning in the forward engine. He pulled down his rangefinder and scanned the immediate area to make sure there were no unfriendlies before they began their final 1/2 click to check it out. Mercifully, it appeared all clear and safe to approach. Well, except for that front engine fire anyway. He wondered whether they'd managed to land on an uninhabited planet?  _ More likely _ , he thought,  _ we just haven't met the natives yet _ . 

They made their way cautiously to the ship and then inside, through the same opening in the side that they had escaped out of just the day before. It was vacant, but it was clear that it wouldn't be in their best interests to stay very long. There were sparks still intermittently cascading from the cockpit controls and some engine fluid had leaked onto the floor. 

"We'll need to be quick here,” he said, his eyes on the engine fluid. “Let's fan out and search for what we need and get outta here." 

Ahsoka nodded in agreement. "I'll stay here and check the communicator if you search the back for medical supplies and food." 

"Right, Commander." 

"Rex..." 

"Ah, sorry...Ahsoka. Force of habit." He didn't need to see her face to know she was smiling. 

He headed to the back and began to pull open the cabinets that housed the food stores. He was luckier than he deserved; it was well stocked with ration bars. He grabbed a nearby blanket from one of the bunks and stuffed it with as much as he could carry. He also found two brand new waterskins that were much better than his own, so he packed those as well. He tied the blanket at the ends to hold it shut and moved on to see what else might be of use to them in the rubble. As he made his way to the medical supply cabinet further back, he was interrupted by a scream and the smell of smoke emanating from the direction of the cockpit. He had enough sense not to drop his makeshift sack of rations as he raced forward and into the chaos. 

It looked as though Ahsoka had been blasted backwards and hit her head on something as she was knocked out cold and draped across the copilot's seat. He tied the bag of rations to his belt and slung Ahsoka over his shoulder. He could see the engine fluid flowing more plentifully into the cockpit. It was definitely time to go. He hoisted her into a more secure position, for the second time in two days wondering where he should put his hand to secure her and making the same decision of the small of her back before hurrying to the exit. 

He'd no sooner gotten them out of the ship and made it 100 meters when he heard the first explosion. He picked up his pace, his lungs on fire as he fought to pull in air while running with the added weight and his injuries. His muscles were all straining and he felt the now familiar rip of skin on his thigh that told him he'd re-opened his wound for the second time today.  _ Well, at least I have a good excuse for this one,  _ he thought grudgingly. He'd made it well past the trees when the ship exploded in earnest, the ground shaking with the force of it and shrapnel of durasteel flying past his head. Increasing his pace, his leg throbbing and his ribs sharply stabbing his sides, he cleared the entrance to the cave. 

Fighting every urge to drop to his knees and rest for a moment, he gently lowered Ahsoka from his shoulder to place her comfortably lying down on the cave floor. This scene was uncomfortably familiar to the one from last night. The feeling of deja-vu settled in his gut as he gingerly rustled her shoulder. This time she woke up.  _ Thank the fucking Maker _ . "Rex? What happened? Are you ok?" 

Her concern was really touching. He knew that she cared about all of the clones, but this was different. This felt like she cared about  _ him _ . He pushed those thoughts to the side for now. "I'm fine. Can't say the same for the ship though." 

She sat up, her eyes widening, "Oh no... What happened to the ship?" 

"It blew up." 

Her head fell and he saw her eyes lock on his thigh, where a very large wet patch was visible on his blacks in between the gaps in his plates. "You're hurt Rex! What..." She looked at him, a blush infusing her cheeks, "Um...if you can tell me...w-what happened?" She was blushing furiously now and he knew why.  _ Why did he have to be such a complete di'kut this morning? _

He closed his eyes for a beat in embarrassment before he responded evenly, "It's fine. It's nothing. Just had to get back here fast and all the running tore it apart." 

She was looking really concerned, but still blushing deeply. She stood up and so did he, attempting to stop her so that he could check her for injuries first, but his rapid shift from kneeling to standing was more than his battered body could take. He felt his wound open further, blood seeping down his leg and he fell back to the floor in a graceless pile of limbs. He bit back the curse that was on the tip of his tongue, grit his teeth and tried again to raise himself up. 

Ahsoka's gentle hand on his shoulder caused him to pause. "Rex, you stay there and let me help you or I swear I'll restrain you with the Force." 

He huffed out a laugh and attempted to wave her off, "Ahsoka, I'm  _ fine _ . I just need a minute to-" 

"No, Rex. I'm going to get the supplies and you're going to let me-" 

"No!" She looked stunned. He'd never yelled at her before. Battles didn't count. But she  _ didn't understand _ . She needed to understand. It had been a bad idea the first time and he couldn't let her touch him like that again. 

He tried again, less volume but the same amount of finality, "No, Ahsoka. That's a bad idea. I can ta-" 

She looked offended and stern as she cut across him, "You are in no condition to do anything right now. I am going to help you and you are going to let me." He opened his mouth to argue but her next sentence smothered any retort he could have come up with, "That's an order, Captain." He closed his mouth. This was going to be a problem. He just fucking knew it. A really big problem. 

**Ahsoka's POV**

She hated to say that, she really did, but he hadn’t left her much choice. Sure it would be awkward,  _ maybe really awkward _ , but she honestly did need to help him this time. Although she would be lying if she said she wasn't also excited, just a tiny bit, to have him so bare before her again. Her stomach flipped around like a fish trying to find its way back to water. 

She made her way over to the area where Rex had laid out their various supplies and looked over what they had. It had fast dwindled down from what they'd started with to a little bacta spray and one medpatch. She grabbed them both along with the blanket that Rex had rolled up their food rations in and made her way back over to Rex, who had arranged his body into a very stiff and uncomfortable looking sitting position against the wall. 

"Ahsoka, you can't use that medpatch on me. That's the last one and it's for you." He was dead serious and his tone brooked no argument. She didn't want to argue, but that only left her with bacta spray, which wasn't going to do a whole lot without either wrap or a patch to seal the medicine on the gash. She knelt down beside him, deep in thought. An idea was coming to her,  _ a potentially really good idea _ , but she wasn't at all sure how he'd take it. 

"Ok, but you know that doesn't leave me with very much to help you with." The glare he was giving her said that he neither wanted nor needed any help right now, thank you very much. But she knew better. He once got shot in the chest, the blaster mark inches from his heart, and he had ordered his men to treat him and then let him back into the battle. Thankfully at the time, Kix had the good sense to force him to recover and Rex did relent and follow those orders. This time, she would have to be like Kix, in charge and assertive and make sure he gave himself time to recover. Everyone had their breaking point where their body just couldn't handle it anymore. And this was as close as she was going to let Rex get to that point. 

"Since we're limited on supplies, I have an idea." He quirked an eyebrow at her.  _ Force, he had no idea how attractive he was when he did that.  _ "Do you trust me?" 

His eyebrows met as his brows creased in contemplation. She knew he was trying to figure out what she had in mind before answering and committing himself to anything. Apparently he wasn't able to guess it so he gave in, "Yes, I trust you." 

"Ok, then lets get your plates off and I-" 

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, hey wait, aren't you going to tell me your idea?" 

"You trust me, right?" 

"Yeeess..." He was teasing her a bit, she knew, but she could also feel his force signature half shivering with...nerves maybe? 

"It's nothing bad, don't worry. In fact, I think it'll be much better than a medpatch once I’m done. Don't worry, Trooper; I'll take good care of you," she winked for emphasis and was surprised to see his breath hitch. It was so fleeting, she must have imagined it, because the next second his face was impassive, a mask hiding his emotions from her. "Ok, let's get these plates off." She reached for his pauldron and his hand shot out, gripping her wrist. 

"I can get them-" 

"No. You need to just sit here and let me help you for once." He looked a little shocked at her forcefulness. She took an easier tone, "Please, Rex? You're always helping me. Let me help you this time." It was a statement, but also a request. To her surprise, he didn't refuse. He nodded, almost imperceptibly, but he nodded all the same, his eyes watching her closely. 

She resumed her position with her hands on his pauldron, pulling it over his head. She made short work of the rest of his armor, all the while keeping her eyes away from his, a little apprehensive at what she might see there. She was able to tell as she removed the plates from his legs that his body was reacting to her nearness, or just to someone touching it so intimately, but she ignored it. She had a job to do and he was allowing her to help. The last thing she needed to do was draw attention to the fact that this was a very charged situation.

His armor finally removed, it was time to once again remove the lower half of his blacks. When she reached for his pants, she did chance a look at his face. It was meant to be just a glance, a quick and discreet flick of her eyes upwards. But when her eyes met his, they were trapped. His eyes were  _ smoldering _ and she found she couldn't look away. His gaze burning a line of fire straight to her groin, tightening her stomach and goading wetness from between her legs in an instant. She licked her lips, frantic for moisture and, still holding his eyes, hooked her fingers into his waistband and pulled. She distinctly saw his breath catch this time. It made her stomach tense again. The thought that this might be as...intense...to him as it was to her was causing her heart to beat faster. A whole lot faster.

She was careful as she tugged them down, not wishing to aggravate his wound any further. She could feel his heartbeat beating a wild rhythm as her hands made their way down his skin, inch by inch baring him to her. At a certain point their eyes parted, his hands darting out to grab the blanket that she'd brought, succeeding in covering himself without her accidently catching a look this time, as she moved farther and farther down. She wasn't sure if she'd need to or not, but just in case, she removed his pants completely. She was both surprised and relieved that he didn't stop her or protest. 

She didn't dare attempt a glance this time. 

She placed her palms on his warm thigh, one hand on either side of his injury, her slender fingers almost touching his wound, watching the muscles twitch at her presence there. She could feel his eyes on her but she fought the urge to look up. She closed her eyes and reached out with the Force. 

She could feel his skin. She probed deeper and she could feel the tendons and bones, the blood rushing through his veins. She tried to tune out his muscles shaking slightly and his uneven breathing as she worked. She began to slowly knit him back together, starting on the lowest level and working her way up to the topmost layer of his bronzed skin. 

She had no idea how long she worked, she was only cognizant of the fact that she  _ could not _ afford a mistake. She was sweating a little with the effort. Once the lower layers had been stitched back together, her fingers began to ghost so lightly over the gash as she worked. She didn't want to miss any spots. She felt his hand land on her shoulder, his light grip comforting and encouraging and it made her feel safe and protected. It warmed her heart in a way she couldn't quite explain. His hand remained there as she worked. 

As she was finishing up the topmost layer, she had an urge. A  _ very dangerous _ urge to push the boundaries just a little between them. So little separated her from him under that blanket and right now she desperately wanted to feel more of him. Wanted to connect with him, to feel him open up to her, reveal some secret hidden part of himself that he normally kept safely locked away. She wasn't daring enough to stretch her hand those last few inches, but maybe... 

Just a peek... just a little peek. Like a curious lothcat, unable to stop herself, she reached out with the Force, raised the blanket just a hair and slipped underneath, silent as the night and as gentle as a breeze. 

He loomed before her, long, thick, and swollen, resting heavily on his stomach as his abs rapidly clenched and unclenched with each pant through his flaring nostrils. Blue tendrils of veins ran down the sides, throbbing as she watched the blood race through them. A thatch of coarse dark blond hair obscured the foundation. 

Togruta didn't have hair and she felt an almost overwhelming desire to touch it. What would it feel like against her skin? Beneath the tempting curly hairs dangled a wrinkled, weighty-looking sack that for some reason also beckoned her to touch. It looked so soft yet firm, the mystery of that dichotomy tugging at her natural urges to glean the truth and she had to forcefully stop herself from brushing the skin there with her fingertips. She reached out with the Force instead, a delicate whisper across and around that saggy appendage, watching his eyes roll back in his head as she did so. His Force signature told her it was in not pain but...relief or satisfaction maybe? It was hard to distinguish but it was definitely a positive feedback so she kept going. Sensing along, around and across it, watching the skin bunch and move with her almost as though she was really touching it. 

But she wasn't. Not really. As much as she wanted to. 

Shifting her attention upwards, she reached out further. While she couldn't exactly feel it, she could sense it. Solid and unyielding as beskar and smooth and silky as the finest fabric at the same time. If she touched it, is that what she'd feel? She swore she could almost feel it now as she expanded her awareness in the Force and already it was like her long, skinny fingers had entwined themselves around it and applied a gentle, exploring pressure at the base. His breathing sped up to a rapid pant and she could have sworn she felt his length twitch against her palm. But she couldn't have... she was just sensing all of this through the Force... 

His hand was still on her shoulder, his fingers gripping a little harder now. 

If she moved, that velvety skin shifted with her but the beskar underneath stood firm, save for the constant beat of his heart that she could really, truly, almost feel pounding inside of it. If she moved she could feel his whole body tense, muscles bunching and flexing. If she moved she could almost smell the ration bar he'd had for breakfast on his breath as he harshly gusted it across her montrals with each sharp inhale he took. She could sense trepidation, anticipation, and so much... want maybe? Need? With each twist of her wrist she could sense relief so near. 

The tip of it was a deep rosy brown and there was something coming out of a slit at the peak of it. A clear something running down the veins pulsing along the length, almost as though it were weeping. She could almost feel it. Almost taste it. She really wanted to. 

She reached out further, with the Force she was sure, and scooped it into her finger and brought it to her lips. It was salty, thick, musky maybe but not completely unpleasant. 

His eyes were open now, wide and intent and desperate, focused on her own, wordlessly begging her to keep moving. But that wasn't right because this wasn't really happening, she was just sensing it though the Force. 

Wasn't she? 

She didn't stop to think about it. His pleading eyes commanding her and beseeching her at the same time to just move. 

So she did. 

His fingers began to dig into her shoulder. 

Up and down, up and down, now and then her thumb rolling across the tip to catch more of its tears and absorb them into her skin. His eyes closed again and his breathing became a ragged pant. If she had paused to think about it, she would have realized her breath mirrored his own: short and desperate. 

Up and down, a little more pressure, a little more speed. She could sense what he wanted and instinctively obliged. One hand still on her shoulder, gripping almost painfully now, the other balled into a fist at his side. 

Up and down, up and down, the tiniest bit more pressure, the tiniest bit more speed. His knuckles were white and she could almost smell a coppery odor from that one drop of blood that she knew had blossomed on his palm as his short nails breached the skin there. 

Up and down, up and down, a little more pressure, a little more speed. His hips were moving now, frenzied and wild, those curly hairs coarse and scratchy on her smooth skin, that strange sack slapping obscenely on her fist. 

Up and down, up and down, just that little bit more pressure, just that little bit more speed. 

His mind screamed his relief along with... her name? She was sure it was his mind, but it sounded so real. His head banging backwards so hard she feared he might crack his skull on that unforgiving cave wall. Thick, hot jets of white viscous release fountained upwards, arching so high they almost splattered his own face. Where had the blanket gone? His thighs jerked and spasmed as she slowly eased her pressure and decreased her speed at his mental instruction. 

He was beautiful like this. He looked...free was maybe the best word. At peace like she'd never seen him before even though she could still sense his vulnerability and fear at leaving himself so naked before her. 

She let her gaze run over his still quaking form until it reached her hand, actually wrapped around his twitching girth and bathed in his climax. 

Oh Sithspit... what had she done? 

He was still breathing heavily, sweaty and spent, like he'd just finished a really rigorous workout that had pushed him beyond his limits. His eyes were still closed and she felt herself beginning to worry. She hadn't really meant to touch him...had she? It had all started as wanting to just see, to maybe explore a bit, but  _ discreetly _ . It wasn't supposed to go this far. 

He opened his eyes and looked at her. Looked at her with awe but also with...guilt or embarrassment maybe? 

And fear. 

She could feel his fear. She didn't need to reach out through the Force to feel it. It was thick and dense, hanging over them both like a fog. He covered himself and sat up straighter. 

"Rex, I-" 

"Ahsoka." It was only one word but it communicated so much more than any monologue she could have crafted. It told her he didn't understand why she'd done it. It told her he didn't want to understand. 

And she didn't understand. 

"Ahsoka, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have-" 

"Rex, please don-" 

" _ Ahsoka _ ." His eyes were shining in the dim light of the cave, amber orbs boring into her eyes, begging and insisting that she hear him out with no interruptions. "This was a mistake.  _ My _ mistake. You were only trying to heal me and I-I took advantage of the situation. It was wrong and I am so, so sorry. I think it's best if we keep our distance, at least as much as possible, until help arrives. Tomorrow, I'll go ba..." 

He was still talking, but she was no longer listening. She knew he was guiding the conversation away from something he didn't want to process or deal with, and ushering it forward to something more comfortable and safe. Putting his armor back on piece by piece, shielding himself and all of his insecurities and flaws from her again. And unknowingly tearing her heart apart with each word. 

She didn't hear the rest of his speech. She didn't need to. She knew it had already turned into a discourse on the best strategy from this point on. That's what he knew best. That was his comfort zone. Strategy. Rules. The best and safest course of action in all things.  _ In all things. _

She'd so badly wanted something different, something more with him. She had thought he wanted it too. Could have sworn she'd sensed how much he cared for her, how much he wanted her. Wanted more with her too. 

Maybe he did. Or maybe it was just a charged moment between two lonely souls trapped on a deserted system together. Maybe Rex was right and she should let the moment pass as a mistake, an error in judgement on her part and leave it alone. Let it die. Or maybe she shouldn't. 

Her head was still spinning that night as she fell asleep. Tonight the blanket was draped over her slight form instead of Rex's warm and comforting shirt. She felt a twinge in her chest at the loss of that shirt and all the things that went missing with it. He now slept close to the entrance of the cave, as far from her as possible, in full armor, clearly taking no chances with his body or his heart. That image made the twinge in her own heart more of a constant ache that she felt all the way into her very bones. All the way into her soul. 

She had to make this right. Whether it was as the friends they were before she'd taken that chance this afternoon, or as something more, she only knew that she had to make this right. Make this better. And that thought, coupled with the image of Rex, his back to her and mind fortified by a thick fortress built of durasteel walls, was the last thing she saw before she finally drifted off into an uneasy sleep. 


	3. Day 3 - The Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rex and Ahsoka deal with the aftermath of her inappropriate but oh-so-wonderful use of the Force. Lots of angst, miscommunication and continuing awkwardness and inappropriateness ensues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Star Wars or any of its characters :(
> 
> Sushifish, thank you so much for looking over this chapter for me before I post it! You are so amazing and I really appreciate you :)

**Rex’s POV**

If you would have asked him two rotations ago whether he thought it was possible for any single day to be the best and the worst of your life, he would have told you emphatically no. How could one day be both the best and the worst? But he knew better now. He knew now that it was indeed possible. Maybe highly improbable, but  _ absolutely possible _ . Yesterday had been that day for him. 

He sighed and shifted uncomfortably. He’d slept in his armor before. What clone hadn’t at some point? But between the unforgiving plastoid digging into his cracked ribs, his belt pressing so hard into his hips that he was sure that it had left a permanent impression there, and his karking pauldron, there was just no comfortable position to be had. 

And if he was honest with himself, it probably didn’t matter anyway. He’d been such a complete di’kut last night, probably ruined his friendship with Ahsoka inexorably. He  _ knew _ he wouldn’t have been sleeping anyway, so his physical discomfort right now was little more than a thinly veiled excuse for why he hadn’t slept.

The sun was coming up over the horizon again. He could see it clearly, bathing the sky in a deep burnt orange color that abruptly drew his thoughts back to Ahsoka and her soft sienna skin. He sighed again. 

_ Gods what he wouldn’t give for last night never to have happened _ .

Well, that wasn’t really true. Not all of the truth anyway. 

But it didn’t matter anymore. Didn’t matter who had started or who had ended it. Didn’t really matter either how she had felt or whether she’d wanted it, too. Didn’t matter how kriffing good it felt. How  _ really kriffing good _ it had felt. And most of all it also  _ didn’t fucking matter at all _ how he felt about it. Or how he felt about her. Because it was wrong and he knew it.  _ He knew it _ . He couldn’t have her... _ not like that _ .

Before last night, he’d had her as a friend. Maybe even a good friend. Certainly to him she’d been that, but to her...he didn’t know and anyway,  _ it didn’t matter _ . Just like everything else now. 

It didn’t matter because he’d managed to fuck it up. Like an absolute di’kut. He’d managed to fuck it up so flawlessly that he wasn’t sure she’d ever speak to him again. And he wouldn’t blame her. She’d healed him, selflessly and readily given part of her own life force to treat his injury and he’d taken advantage of her. How had he said “Thank you” to her for everything she’d done? He had thrusted into her hand with total abandon, heedless of the consequences.  _ Careless _ ; his shame pouring out and covering his chest like it had immersed his soul. 

Only, if he thought about it, that wasn’t completely true either. Not the whole story. Another half truth.

If he forced his memory to resurrect the events of last night, as reluctant as he was to do so, he could recall her hand reaching for him willingly. Her eyes closed in concentration as she’d stroked him, pleasured him in ways he’d hardly even dared to dream of. He’d had his hand on her shoulder though.  _ The whole time _ . She might have thought he’d wanted that,  _ which, oh fucking Maker he had _ , but maybe she’d felt...obligated? Or pressured because of his hand there?  _ Why else would she have done it? _ It wasn’t possible that she wanted him too. Not like he wanted her. She  _ couldn’t… _

_ But _ , he admonished himself,  _ it doesn’t fucking matter anyway. _

Because he couldn’t have her,  _ like that _ , even if she did want him, which he was so sure she  _ couldn’t possibly  _ anyway. Because he was a loyal soldier of the Grand Army of the Republic. The _ fucking Captain _ of the 501st. Because it was against the rules and he followed his orders.  _ Because she deserved so much better than him.  _

And of course because he’d fucked it up so completely and utterly anyway.

He huffed out a breath and stood, putting on his helmet, the one piece of his armor he hadn’t adorned before feigning sleep. Once his bucket was securely in place, he finally summoned the courage to check on Ahsoka in his peripheral vision. She was still sleeping, or so it appeared, but fitfully, her body jostling around on that uncomfortable cave floor, seemingly also unable to find a comfortable position. He could relate to that. 

He watched her unabashedly for a moment, knowing that she couldn’t see where he was looking. She was so beautiful she was almost hard to look at. That soft, rich ochre skin, her white markings like a work of art dappled across it. He tore his eyes away and focused instead on the now very uninteresting sunrise.

It wasn’t long before he heard rustling and shuffling behind him which indicated she was awake. “Rex?”

“Right here, Commander. I’m glad you’re up. I’m going to head out for a bit this morning. I want to have a look around, see if I can find a settlement where we can get word out to General Skywalker. There’s gotta be something ‘round here somewhere.” He made it clear in his words and his tone that he was going alone.

Her arms immediately crossed over her chest and her face took on that look he knew so well of and-why-do-I-have-to-stay-behind? 

He cut across her before her mouth could even open to shut him down with a protest or an order, “I won’t be gone long Sir. Just stay here and I’ll be back before you know it.” He turned and strode out the door without a parting word or backwards glance. His exhale left his lungs in a rush as soon as he was a safe distance away. He shouldn’t be afraid of a conversation. He shouldn’t be afraid of her company. But he was a little terrified of both right now.

He was probably going to pay for his hasty retreat when he returned to the cave, but he had his hard-won freedom right now and he was sure as hell going to utilize it to his best advantage. To make a plan and recon the area while doing it. 

He pulled down his rangefinder and did a quick scan. It looked about the same in every direction. Heavily wooded, some rocky cliffs and large hills in the vicinity of their cave. He decided to begin his search further out and end near the cave. He headed back towards where their ship was and then continued far past it, rangefinder still descended to enable him to cover a wider area. But it was no good. It was all the same. More trees, rocks, and hills. No settlements or any indication that they weren’t the only two lifeforms here.

He pressed on anyway, alert to his surroundings but his mind also pouring over all of his transgressions from last night. And more importantly, what he was going to karking do about it. There was just no skirting around the fact that Ahs- no, no, _no_... _Commander_ _Tano_ had given him a handjob. A really fucking hot and amazing hand job that he'd wished had never ended. 

Wrong, wrong, wrong.  _ It was wrong.  _ And he had to stop reminiscing about it. Fantasizing about what had happened,  _ what he so wished would happen again, _ was absolutely not going to help.

What he needed was to get off this kriffing system and away from Ahsoka.  _ Fuck _ .  _ Commander Tano _ . Away from all the temptation. And soon, before he made an even bigger di'kut of himself. If that was even possible at this point.

He looked around. He could finally see a variance in the landscape. Far in the distance, at least a two day march from the cave, he spied a lush mountain. He'd ventured a great distance past where he’d intended to go already, but he hated to return empty handed. Empty handed  _ and  _ without any suggestions as to how to improve his... _ situation… _ with Ahsoka. 

With  _ Commander Tano. _

He'd just need to keep his distance,  _ and keep his kriffing dick in his pants,  _ until they could find a way off this rock.

As he headed back to the cave, dejected at his failure to find even the  _ hint _ of a solution to either of his problems, his anxiety began to build. What would he say to her when he returned? What would she say to him? 

It was a warm day today, no clouds in the sky. Between the heat from the sun, the heat from his bodyglove, and the exertion of his long hike in full kit, he was sweating. He'd been stewing in his blacks for longer than he cared to think about. At the very minimum it had been two standard days. These same blacks had been recently soaked in blood, bathed in sweat, and who could forget,  _ splattered with his spunk  _ last night. He needed a change of clothes, and a bath at the very least, but that satisfaction wasn't achievable as he had no clothes to change into. 

As a Captain in the GAR, especially one whose job it was to watch over General Skywalker and Ah-  _ Commander Tano _ , he was no stranger to going a few standard days without a change or a wash. Some campaigns just demanded that kind of sacrifice and if this were a normal situation, he wouldn’t even be thinking twice about it.  _ But this wasn’t a normal situation _ . And the thought of being sequestered in that small cave with Commander Tano and knowing that he was wearing just about every bodily fluid short of his own piss was just too much even for him.

He  _ could _ use the stream for a quick cleaning though…

That was a little risky given the... _ situation _ ...he’d put himself in, but it should be doable. The stream was far enough away from the cave that there was really no risk of her seeing him, or vice versa if she wanted to clean up. 

And fuck if that thought wasn’t the most amazing thing his brain could conjure up. Ahsoka, naked in the stream, water cascading down that perfect skin in tempting rivulets...

_ Ah fuck _ this was not helping. It was one thing to command himself to stop thinking about her but it was a whole other and much more difficult thing to actually  _ follow  _ those orders. But he was nothing if not determined and he was going to do his best. Good soldiers don’t fantasize about their commanding officers. Good soldiers keep their hands to themselves, their heads down and get the job done no matter what. Good soldiers follow orders. And he was nothing if not a good soldier.  _ No matter how much he wanted to throw those notions aside and take her right up against the cave wall like… _

_ Deep breaths. Deep breaths. Think of something else.  _

It took awhile, but to his surprise it did actually work this time. Maybe there was hope for him yet.

The sun was high in the sky now, boiling him in his blacks as it reflected off his armor. He was conscious of each drop of sweat that leaked out of his pores. 

A glimmer that wasn’t armor suddenly caught his attention about 100 meters away. He studied it for a second, hand ready at his blaster. It neither moved nor made a sound and he was quickly convinced that it was inanimate and safe to approach. He made his way cautiously in that direction and the closer he got, the more sure he was that this was wreckage from their ship. 

He reached the object and was both shocked and delighted to see it was a piece of electrical hardware from the cockpit controls. It was mostly intact, maybe even functional to some degree, and looked less charred than it probably should be after the explosion. He scooped it up and determined to bring it with him. Commander Tano was very handy at using assorted odds and ends to build communicators; maybe this would be of some use to them? 

He surveyed the environment around him, looking for anything else that may prove helpful. Upon closer inspection, he was able to snap up a few more spare parts and gears that had been strewn about the area. Acknowledging that there was nothing else to be gained here, he pushed on and back to the cave.

He’d made it just about another klick when he saw it. He couldn’t believe his luck! How had he missed this before? It was a jedi robe and very nearly intact. There were scorch marks on it, the edges were tattered and torn, and one of the sleeves was ripped just about in half, but it was otherwise perfectly usable. How it had survived he had no karking idea, but Maker help him, he snatched it up like it was the last ration bar and he was dying of hunger.  _ This would definitely come in handy _ .

Maybe he could even wash his blacks now…

**Ahsoka’s POV**

She was confused. More confused than she could remember being in a very long time. She knew she’d made a very reckless decision last night touching him like that, even if she hadn’t  _ really  _ meant to. At least she  _ didn’t think _ she’d meant to… It was all really confusing. She’d reached out through the Force, at first at least, she was sure of it. But after that things got hazy. But the one thing that was crystal clear was that by the end of it, her hand was actually wrapped around him when he climaxed, his thick semen flowing down her wrist.

She hadn’t been consciously trying to touch him, although she’d  _ really  _ wanted to. But in the end, what she’d intended was irrelevant. She  _ had _ touched him, a little bit of the evidence still on her skirt and leggings where either it had dripped or she’d wiped it off. Maybe a little of both. 

Last night he had seemed to want it as much as she had. His eyes had been begging her for more, his mind showing her what he liked best. But maybe he really hadn’t wanted it after all? He’d definitely enjoyed it, but that didn’t mean he had really wanted it. She was his CO, maybe once she’d crossed that line in the sand, he’d been afraid to tell her to step back behind it again. Maybe he felt  _ obligated  _ in some twisted way once she’d started…

She let out a frustrated sigh. This line of thought wasn’t going to get her anywhere. She needed to talk to him and clear the air before it got so toxic that neither could function in its cloud. 

But of course talking to him was out of the question since he was refusing to even look at her. He’d left this morning without so much as a good morning, transparently desperate to escape her company. Well, when he got back, they were going to talk about this,  _ whether he liked it or not _ . Force help her, she’d make it an order if she had to. 

She’d been around Rex now for more rotations than she could count. Been his friend for that same amount of time.  _ Been attracted to him for… _

Well, that wasn’t important now. What was important was that they re-establish a comfortable friendship. She could deal with his potential rejection of her feelings later.

It was lonely in this cave by herself. She missed his company, the easy banter with her that he normally had, and that really kriffing attractive half smile that on occasion adorned his handsome face. 

She sighed again. She disliked being idle. She could have insisted she go with him. She could leave the cave and explore on her own. She didn’t have to follow his directive to stay here until he got back. But she did. He would lose his mind if he came back to find her gone, she just knew it. He’d feel that way whether she’d messed things up between them or not. And so she stayed, bored and contemplative, awaiting his return. 

She finally decided to pass the time in a more constructive way, by attempting to Force heal herself. It would be a really challenging task as she’d need to pull energy from somewhere to heal herself. She ate a ration bar to fortify herself before trying and then shimmied out of her battle dress, letting it rest on her hips. Her stomach injury was probably the easiest to attempt first as it wouldn’t involve reconstructing pieces of bones; only really stitching skin back together. 

She laid down flat and as comfortable as she could manage on the cave floor and then removed her bandages. It already looked much better than when it had first sliced through her skin two standard days ago.  _ Rex had really done a good job of treating it  _ she thought with a pang in her chest. 

She pushed her introspections to the side for now and got started, moving her life energy around, taking some from her arms, a little from her legs and a smattering from other places and redirecting it into seamlessly knitting herself back together. She had no idea how long it took her. It might have been a minute, it might have been an hour or even many hours. However long it took, she was extremely proud when she’d finished. Her palms massaged the newly healed skin, reveling in its softness.

She felt excited and encouraged, ready to take on more, and she decided to get to work on her ribs. May as well, since Rex didn’t appear to be in a hurry to come back. 

She took her time with her ribs, bones being infinitely harder to heal than flesh alone. Once she was done, she felt a little drained, having had to shift and re-distribute so much energy, but she also felt adrenaline pumping in her veins at her accomplishment. She wouldn’t have told Rex last night for a million credits, but that was the first time she’d actually Force healed anyone. She’d been trained in it, understood the theory of how it was supposed to work, but she’d never  _ actually  _ done it before last night. And now she’d successfully done it on three different and very difficult wounds. 

Her hands slid slowly up her newly smooth stomach, enjoying the softness of it when earlier it had been cut in half with a jagged gash. She ran her fingers gently along her regrown ribs and back down again. Her back was cold, laying naked, save for her modest chest wrap, on that cave floor and her nipples had hardened. Her hands brushed over them idly, not directly on the route between ribs and stomach, but Maker it felt so good. She passed over them again and shivered, not just from the cold. 

Well...if he was going to be gone for awhile, maybe she could take some... _ personal time _ ...while she waited for him.

She was still thinking of Rex. Rex from last night with his strong hand on her shoulder, his hot breath whispering across her montrals. She couldn’t erase his face as he climaxed from her mind, a shaking, quivering, and incoherent  _ beautiful _ mess. And she gave up trying, for now at least. One hand rubbed across her chest once more before cementing her decision by reaching behind her back and removing the chest wrap completely. 

She knew she was taking a chance right now, the situation incredibly precarious as Rex could walk in any minute. Part of her was hoping that he would. An alarmingly large part of her was hoping that he’d walk in and catch her with her hand wrist deep under her tights and her back arched. 

_ What would he do if he saw her like that? _

She shivered at that, and one of her hands  _ did  _ dip below the waistband of her leggings. She was soaked already. Disturbed as she was by the intensity of her body’s reaction to the mere thought of Rex catching her doing something so incredibly brazen and inappropriate, it wasn’t near enough to get her to stop.  _ Not even close.  _ In fact, that part of her that was wishing he’d walk in on her right now was rapidly shutting down all opposition.

She went straight to work, two fingers plunging into her folds, while her thumb rubbed her clit. As lost as she was already in the sensations, she was dimly aware that, whether she wanted him to or not, Rex walking in on this might be a bad idea if her goal was to fix their relationship rather than damaging it further. So she’d better get this done quickly. 

_ But,  _ that other part of her persisted,  _ what if he wants to see you like this? What if he wants to do for you what you did for him last night? _

She moaned helplessly at the thought, the sound escaping her lips and echoing all around her as it bounced off the cave walls. She wanted to stop the sounds, she did, but she just  _ couldn’t  _ right now. 

Her hand was working at a frantic pace, diving in and out as her thumb purposefully circled her clit in the way she knew would get her off in record time. She pinched her nipples, her back already lifting off the ground just a little, all the while wishing her hands were his.

_ “Rex…”  _ she moaned.

She could see his face so clearly as it swam before her under her tightly clenched eyelids. He was staring at her with that fire in his golden eyes that she was so sure she’d seen that first night as she’d treated his injuries. She  _ knew  _ he wanted her too.  _ At least in her fantasy _ , it was there smoldering in his eyes; a need as desperate as her own.

She could almost feel him there in that cave with her, eyes locked on her bare, writhing body as it arched with complete abandon. Her skirt riding up, one hand on her breasts and the other deep inside her as she whimpered his name again. She could really almost see him watching her every move, fighting the urge to rush to her side, to shove his own hand in and finish the job for her.

She could almost hear his solid footsteps. An odd crashing sound that she couldn’t place, maybe like he’d dropped his helmet in his excitement. The hiss of his harsh breath as it filtered through his flaring nostrils followed by a ragged pant.

She wanted to feel him again, like she had last night, to watch him come undone with her. She clamped her eyes more tightly closed in concentration, beckoning the memory and all of the feelings that went with it to the forefront of her mind. 

She could see it now tucked safely into his blacks and under his armor.  _ But that wasn’t right...it had been exposed for her, hiding just behind the thin veil of that scratchy blanket… _

Now wasn’t the time to sort out the inconsistencies, the image of it sheathed within his blacks and armor would work fine for her daydream. She reached back out, into her minds’ eye and there it was again, hard and unyielding as durasteel but with a velvety softness that begged for her touch. So she did. She wanted it so badly. She remembered wrapping her fingers around it, just a little pressure at first and then a little more the faster she went. 

She could swear she heard her name whispered from his lips, could swear she saw his eyes close again in pleasure, just like she remembered from last night.

_ But wait...that wasn’t right either. He hadn’t said her name...had he? _

That was a question for any other time. Right now she was so close and so was he. She could feel it. She added a slight twist of her wrist as she moved and she was sure he was throbbing urgently beneath her fingers. She moved faster, her hand scraping against the fabric of his blacks, but she paid it no mind. It was so real. _ She wanted it to be real. _

_ “Rex!”  _

She came hard, back arching dramatically, legs convulsing and her fingers drawing it out as long as she could before overstimulation forced her to retreat. Her eyes were still closed and as she slowly descended her high, she could still swear she heard his footsteps.

Her eyes shot open in panic and she looked wildly around the cave. She saw nothing. Relief spread over her like a soft blanket. Her rapid heartbeat began to calm again as her fear and adrenaline subsided. 

Her vision had been so clear, so  _ transparent _ , that it had truly almost felt as though she were looking outside of herself and seeing the cave as it really was. With him  _ really _ standing there and that look  _ really  _ in his eyes.  _ And her hand really stroking him again _ ...

She glanced at her hands, one clean and the other coated in her own release. No evidence that she’d really touched him this time. She must have been imagining things. It had felt so real...

But the cave, just as before she’d started this dangerous distraction, was empty. So of course he couldn’t have really been there.

_ Could he? _

**Rex’s POV**

_ What the karking hell just happened? _

His whole body was shaking, his hands balled into white knuckled fists at his sides, fighting his desire with every ounce of strength he had. His steps were clumsy and labored as he stumbled as far away from the cave as he could get, his legs tense and quivering with his almost-release by... _her hand?_ But it couldn’t have been her hand, or any part of her because he had stayed safely away, _despite every particle of his being urging him to rush forwards_ _and…_

_ But he hadn’t _ . 

He had strayed no farther than a few steps into the cave entrance. He’d seen and he’d heard,  _ fucking Maker what he’d seen and heard,  _ but he hadn’t touched. He’d been a good soldier and stayed respectfully away, just as he should have. It had been harder than anything he’d ever done. Harder than it damn well should be. Harder than his rock solid and throbbing dick in his blacks right now, and that was saying something. 

He’d stayed away, but he’d seen. He’d heard… He’d heard  _ his name _ as she’d pleasured herself. 

His aching cock pulsed unpleasantly within the confines of his blacks and codpiece and his hand slid towards it before he jerked it quickly back to his side.  _ No _ .  _ He was not going to… _

But he couldn’t wipe the images from his racing mind. Her hand deep under her skirt, her writhing body as she neared her climax, her husky voice as it had whimpered his name. He groaned, unable to stop himself, pleading to the Maker that he was far enough away from the cave now for her not to hear it. 

He had been standing there, watching her with large, wide eyes, his mouth probably hanging open and maybe drooling, but he was sure his hands had remained steadfastly at his sides, his helmet tucked securely under one arm. 

But he’d felt a hand on him. Gripping exploringly with a gentle pressure before stroking purposefully along his length. The shock of those phantom fingers alone should have sent him running from that cave, but he’d stayed, rooted to the spot and delighting in the sensation as he watched her reach for her release. 

He felt...proud maybe and disgusted. Yeah, definitely disgusted with himself. While Ahs-  _ kriffing hell- Commander Tano _ , should not have done something as reckless as that in the cave knowing full well he could walk in at any moment, that didn’t change the fact that  _ he  _ was still in the wrong for watching her.  _ Way in the wrong _ . It was one thing to walk in on it accidentally, but definitely another thing to watch her for as long as he had, not really announcing his presence as he should have, and enjoying it so much he was so close to coming even now.  _ Right on the edge _ . 

But he wasn’t going to give in.  _ He wasn’t _ .

_ Think about something else _ ,  _ think about something else, think about something else… _

He thought about the forest around him, the mountain he’d spotted earlier far off in the distance, the spare parts he’d found….

_ Ah fuck _ .

He was no longer holding the parts he’d found. He must have dropped them in shock when he’d entered the cave. 

_ Haar’chak, haar’chak, haar’chak! _

She’d find them and figure out,  _ which any di’kut could do at this point _ , that he had been there. That he’d seen her,  _ like that _ , half naked and whimpering his name.

_ Fuck, fuck,  _ **_fuck_ ** _! _

It was like the planets had all aligned against him, determined to make this situation as awkward and painful as possible. He wanted to scream in frustration. He wanted to get out of this karking system. He really, really wanted to just say,  _ fuck it _ , and give in. 

But he wouldn’t.

He paced, back and forth, back and forth, fighting to clear his mind of every treacherous thought about Ahsoka. 

_ Haar’chak!  _ **_Commander Tano_ ** . 

He paced back and forth like a caged Nexxu, irritated and exasperated at himself and his inability to get this... _ situation _ ...under control. It didn’t matter what she’d done. He needed to rein it in, put a stop to any further... _ incidents? _ ...before things really went too far.  _ Past the point of no return _ .

His pacing continued until the sun was dipping in the sky, low enough to kiss the horizon, the color again radiating that rich reddish-orange that he’d come to associate with her skin. He sighed, knowing this was probably as composed as he was going to get, and not wishing to make her wait until nightfall for his return. He placed his helmet back on his head. His erection had  _ finally  _ receded, thank the Maker, and his head was mercifully clear of any thought save for putting one foot in front of the other and making his way back to the cave. 

And he was determined to keep it that way.

He reached the cave entrance, took a deep breath, and went inside. Sure enough, the spare parts he’d dropped were there, right in plain sight, just a few steps into the cave. 

He found Commander Tano pacing, wringing her hands and looking distraught. He didn’t know what he’d expected but it wasn’t that. Maybe anger at him? Maybe embarrassment? He swallowed and then cleared his throat to announce his presence,  _ which he should have done the first kriffing time and they wouldn’t be in this mess _ . She jumped as though electrocuted and turned to face him. 

There were tears in her eyes. He wanted so badly to wipe them away for her, but he didn’t dare. It was best that he maintain his distance. Maintain order and propriety. No matter how karking awkward this all was now.

“Commander Tano, I-”

She looked as though he’d slapped her in the face. The expression only overtook her features for a moment though before she composed herself. Now her face was an emotionless mask, giving away nothing of her thoughts or intentions.

“I’m sorry. Sorry for last night, sorry for, uh- I mean, um, you know, sorry for, ah- for walking in when I did… I should have made it clear that I’d gotten back. I was just, um, well, I was- I mean, I didn’t expect…”

“Rex, it’s ok.”

He stiffened, standing at parade rest and attempting to convey that this situation needed to stay formal and proper. He almost wished she’d called him Captain.

She sighed and he saw one solitary tear cascade down her soft cheek to drip from her small chin and onto the floor, shattering into a thousand tiny droplets as it hit, just like his heart. “Ok, Rex.” She looked resigned. Defeated, maybe.  _ Regretful _ ? 

_ No, not regretful. That was impossible. _

Regardless of what it was he saw there,  _ or wished he saw there _ , he was relieved she was letting it drop. He didn’t think he could handle a long, drawn out discussion of what he’d seen and heard today. He was absolutely positive that neither his mind nor his body were up to that task. Now they could just move past it, get back to Commander and Captain,  _ where they needed to be, _ and formulate a plan to get the karking hell out of here.

He cleared his throat, “So, um, I wasn’t able to find any settlements and I went quite a ways past the crash site. There’s a mountain a couple days’ march from here. It’s the only variation in the terrain that I’ve managed to find so far. If you like, we can make our way in that direction tomorrow and see if we can spot anything further afield.” 

She was watching him almost listlessly and he had the distinct impression that she wasn’t really paying attention. She opened her mouth and he just had this feeling that she was going to try and bring the conversation back around to a place he wanted desperately to avoid and he hastily cut across her, “I found some spare odds and ends that survived the crash that I thought might come in handy. Maybe you can make some use of ‘em? I don’t know much about that sorta thing, but you’re aces at building things with junk so I thought-”

“Thanks Rex. I’ll see what I can do.” She offered him a tiny smile that looked forced and not at all like herself.

“I also found a robe. It’s in good shape, only a little roughed up from the explosion. Maybe tomorrow, if you wanted to, you could wash up in the stream. Uh- I mean...uh, well, I  _ meant _ , not that you  _ need  _ to wash up. You’re perfectly fine the way you are, uh-you know, um, I mean, you don’t need to, I was only-”

That actually coaxed a quiet chuckle out of her, “I know what you meant Rex. It’s ok. You know, you don’t have to be nervous around me. I won’t bite.”

_ And fuck if that image didn’t make his cock twitch hopefully again. _

“I know Sir and I’m sorry. It’s just, I mean…” he huffed quietly, annoyed yet again with his lack of composure, “You’re my CO. I don’t want to make things, uh, uncomfortable... It’s hard to find the right words.”

She looked... _ hopeful? _ No, that wasn’t right. It had to be something else.

“Is that what this is about? You’re acting this way because I’m your CO?”

“What? No, no, no, no, that’s not what I meant,” He didn’t want to get into this. Not at all and especially not right now. 

She didn’t understand. It wasn’t just about her being his CO. It was about right and wrong. It was about following orders. It was about  _ her deserving better _ . 

So much better than him.

She was searching his eyes and he was panicking just a bit. He needed to put a stop to this,  _ now _ . “No, Sir. It’s...it’s just not right. Now, let’s let it go and move on.” She looked absolutely crushed. Like he’d taken her favorite treasure and stomped it to a pulp under his boot. He held her eyes, trying his damndest to make sure they were remote and indifferent, no trace of the truth for her to uncover. 

He made a valiant effort to steer the conversation back to a more suitable place. “So, I vote tomorrow we make for the mountain and work on the communicator along the way. What do you say, Commander?” 

She was still looking at him, her head tilting a little to the side, eyes boring into his, making him shift on his feet, uncomfortable and anxious. He hoped that all she found there was a blank slate. He couldn’t afford another misstep.

She considered him thoughtfully for a moment longer before a small and seemingly genuine smile spread across her lips. “Sounds good to me, Captain.” He didn’t know if that smile was good news or bad news for him but he found that he was happy to see it either way.

The rest of the evening passed in quiet contemplation for both of them. Conversation was a little stilted and clumsy, but they were at least speaking and he counted himself grateful for that. And even more grateful that she had chosen to follow his lead and smother every indiscretion he’d perpetuated since the crash. He really was luckier than he deserved this time.

Once their modest and unappetizing dinner of ration bars was complete, he offered to take guard duty again, but she insisted that they take turns and tonight she’d take watch. Actually, she’d ordered it. And so, he found himself settling onto the unforgiving cave floor, in full armor again, searching for sleep. This time, filled with hope that he could actually salvage this mess he’d gotten himself into, he sensed that sleep might actually come. 

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I love your comments so much so if you want to, I'd love to hear what you think of this chapter!


	4. Day 4 - Tentative Explorations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rex and Ahsoka get to know each other and Rex finally gets a bath

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I still don't own Star Wars or any of the characters...I just really enjoy writing about them!
> 
> Thank you so much to sushifish for proofing this for me and always being kind enough to give me her honest opinion on my work ❤

****

**Ahsoka’s POV**

She wasn’t the least bit tired. She knew she should be, but she just wasn’t. She’d expended so much energy yesterday when she’d healed herself - among _other things_ \- and she knew she should feel depleted, but she didn’t. She was wide awake and fidgety, itching to get the day started. 

Last night had been a veritable storm of emotions and words and she’d spent the whole night pouring over them all, sifting through and then categorizing them into neat and efficient stacks in her mind. 

There was a tall, tidy stack that focused on Rex’s reaction last night; all the things he’d said, his expressions as he’d said them, how he’d reacted to her words and expressions, and his Force signature during the whole encounter. Another well organized and also very tall stack contained her own reactions and feelings towards it all. A final tower was filled with miscellaneous things relating to their situation; their long history together, his background, her background, other contributing factors such as their environment etc. 

With her memories arranged in this way, she could conveniently investigate each piece individually or as a group. She had hoped it would aid her in figuring things out between them and offer her some insight on how to proceed from here. While it hadn’t done the whole job, it had given her the beginnings of a plan.

The more she surveyed those stacks and their contents, the more convinced she was that Rex wanted her too. That what he’d left _unsaid_ was as important as what he’d actually said. Maybe even more so. The question was: Why wouldn’t he act on it? 

As ridiculous as this thought was, maybe she hadn’t made it clear enough that she was interested in more with him? Maybe he needed an explicit confession? Maybe she should just come right out and tell him how she felt, leaving nothing up for misinterpretation? But he’d also made it clear that he didn’t _want_ her to talk about it, that he didn’t want to contemplate anything more. But she was sure he didn’t mean it. She could _feel_ that he didn’t mean it. So the question remained: _What should she do about it?_

She knew what she _wanted_ to do about it.

But given everything she’d spent quite literally the entire night filtering through, she decided that the best course of action would be to simply talk to him about it. She deserved an honest answer from him as to what he felt. What he _really_ wanted. She shivered at that thought. She was sure she knew the answer. _So sure._ But she still felt anxiety pumping through her veins at the concept of approaching him, holding out her heart to him, hoping that he’d accept it and entrust her with his in return.

She shifted her position at the cave entrance, antsy and nervous. Behind her, he was shifting now too, beginning to wake up even though the sun hadn’t yet risen. 

Well, that would work just fine; there was no reason they needed to wait until daybreak to move out. She just wanted to unburden these feelings from her chest, wanted to release them into the air so that she could breathe again.

She turned to look at him, sitting up now and adjusting his armor. How uncomfortable he must have been sleeping in all of that. She frowned. _Why had he?_

She knew he was afraid of something about her. She had felt the fear after she’d touched him and she could feel it again now, an almost constant addition to his Force signature since they’d been stranded here together. _But what was he so afraid of?_ She intended to find out today.

“Morning, Rexter!” she said cheerily, attempting to inject some normalcy back into their interactions.

He smiled at her, “Morning, Sir.” Her smile faltered at his use of her title again. In his Force signature, she could still feel it there beneath his grin, just below the surface: that _fear_ of her. 

She hitched her smile back into place, “Here, catch!” She tossed him a ration bar. “Let's eat and then head out. I’m ready to see more of this planet than a cave!”

“Right, Commander,” he agreed as he opened his ration bar, now in full military mode. 

She glowered a bit at that and a small sigh of frustration made its way out of her lungs. This was just not going to do. “Rex…” 

_How do I put this? I won’t bite? I order you to call me Ahsoka?_

“Rex, _please_ call me Ahsoka.” Her tone was soft and sincere but she couldn’t keep that slight tinge of hurt from coloring it.

He froze, ration bar halfway to his mouth before he lowered it again, still looking determinedly at the ground. His brows knit together, contemplating her request and she heard just the tiniest grunt of resignation leak from between his lips before he answered, “Alright, Ahsoka.”

She felt his emotions, like a dam filled with cracks and fissures and ready to burst as the waters rose behind it. One good push, a nudge in the right place, and it would all come out. This definitely didn’t feel like the right time to discuss it though. Not when he was obviously so tense and nervous. She wanted answers and she wanted them now, but he felt so...vulnerable right now beneath her gaze. Yes, she wanted the truth, but she wasn’t about to break him open to get to it. 

“Thanks, Rex.” She wanted to say so much more, but she’d made some progress and she could feel the tension that had been emanating from him ease just a little as she let the rest of her unspoken words be swallowed back into her throat, no longer a threat to his weak defenses. They ate in silence, but it wasn’t as uncomfortable as it could have been. She allowed it, letting him build himself back up emotionally before they stepped out into the unknown of this planet.

Once they’d finished their ration bars, Rex packed up their meager supplies, tied everything to his belt that wouldn’t fit in the pouches, and they left the cave. The day was warm already and the sun still hadn’t crested the horizon, not a cloud in the sky to shield them from its rays. She could hear Rex grumbling just a few steps behind her, something that sounded suspiciously like “damn heat.” She heard him take off his helmet and clip it to his belt. 

Her smile was back in place already, happy to be outside in the sunshine and enjoying the fresh light breeze as it whistled through the trees around them. With her injuries no longer hindering her, she leaped up into the trees. She was showing off a bit but she didn’t care; a somersault here, a flip there, a cartwheel and a swing, moving swiftly from branch to branch and just enjoying herself.

He kept pace with her on the ground and now and again she heard him chuckle as she performed a more flamboyant and elaborate move. She swung around a branch, flinging herself high in the air before twirling four times and landing directly in front of him, arms in the air as if waiting for applause. That earned her another chuckle and she beamed at him, her reaction convincing the corner of his mouth to raise so that he was smiling back at her.

“Glad you’re havin' fun, kid. What happened to your broken ribs? Aren’t they bothering you with all that jumpin’ around?”

She valiantly fought the blush that she was sure was creeping up her cheeks at the memory. “I healed them yesterday, along with the cut on my stomach. I’m good as new.”

“Ah, yeah I was wondering why I hadn’t seen a ban-” He stopped himself abruptly, an answering blush infusing his own cheeks. “I, uh- sorry, Sir...I shouldn’t have-”

“Rex, it’s _okay_. And call me Ahsoka.”

“Right. Well…” he cleared his throat, “I’m glad you’re all better anyway.” He ran his hand along his blonde buzzcut nervously, eyes darting away from hers, their comfortable banter interrupted. She remembered that she hadn’t mended his own broken ribs and he’d been obstinately refusing any medicine other than bacta spray since they’d run low on medpatches. She decided to try something either very brave or very stupid given that she’d only just re-established a dialogue with him. 

Well, she had never been one to shy away from a challenge.

“ _Actually_ , I’m getting pretty good at Force healing now.” She decided to leave out the part where she was also apparently getting pretty good at doing other things with the Force as well. “I’ve done your, um, injury, and then both of mine. Maybe, when we make camp tonight, you could let me-”

“No.” His tone was hard and final, his eyes looking down at the ground again.

“Rex, come on, I know they’re hurting you. And I’m sure I can do it. I've done mine and I'm sure I can do yours. Can’t you just-”

“ _No_.”

She let out a loud and very frustrated huff through her nose as she watched him. His body language had stiffened, the tension overtaking all of his limbs again and his eyes stared, unblinking at a leaf on the forest floor that she was completely certain he wasn’t actually seeing. She pursed her lips and cocked her head at him for a second but ultimately decided now wasn’t the time to argue about it. Right now, she wanted to bring the mood back to where it had been. She could get into it with him about neglecting his ribs tonight when they made camp.

“Ok, let’s keep going.”

“I was thinking Comman- sorry, I mean Ahsoka. I was thinking maybe instead of following the path I took yesterday, maybe we should follow the stream instead. It heads in the same direction and it’ll be good to be close to it when we make camp tonight.”

“I think that’s a great idea, Rex,” she smiled.

He returned her smile tentatively, as though his mouth had forgotten how to do it, and some of the stress seemed to melt from his shoulders. _Some_ of the stress anyway. She could sense enough left over to hold up the jedi temple.

The sun lifted higher in the sky as they walked and it was getting almost unbearably warm now. The trees all around them provided some shade, but she could sense how uncomfortable Rex was becoming as he roasted beneath his armor. “Rex, how about we stop for a bit? It's really hot and you-”

“No, I’m fine, Ahsoka. We should push on; we’re making good time. You don’t need to worry ‘bout me; I was bred for this.”

He said it like it was no big deal, and to him maybe it wasn’t. _I was bred for this_. 

He and the other clones had so few things in their lives that they had a choice about. So few things they were allowed to do or enjoy. Like they were somehow less than human. Like they were property. Like their lives were unimportant. It sickened her.

“Tell me about Kamino, Rex. What was it like growing up there?”

He stopped dead in his tracks for a moment as the shock of her question washed over his face. She couldn’t tell if he was surprised at the question or surprised that she cared enough to ask it. He blinked at her, uncomprehending, “What do you mean? I mean, what do you wanna know?”

It was like he thought she was asking him this question for tactical reasons. As though he suspected she might need this information to plan some future strategy and he wanted to be sure he related the proper information to her. Maybe no one had ever cared to ask him such a personal question before. That thought chipped a small crack in her heart.

“Everything you want to tell me. I was just wondering what life was like for you there. You know, how you grew up…” she trailed off. He had stopped walking and was looking at her - really _looking_ at her now - his eyes burning into her own with a look she didn’t think she’d ever seen there before. She couldn’t quite place it. It felt almost like admiration or awe, but it was deeper than that. Like veneration maybe tinged with pride? It was a unique combination of things that she couldn’t sort out right now, but she knew it was positive and she was content with that.

Still holding her eyes, he swallowed thickly, “Well, from early on we had a very strict schedule to keep. There was military strategy, weapons training, target practice, physical training and stress tests, endurance and memory tests, survival training...” He started walking again, resuming his original pace now that his shock had dissipated.

“It was a full day every day. You’d train with your fellow batchers primarily and we all got on well. The training was intense. The kaminoans, they drill in the importance of taking care of your brothers and following orders. That was always the most important. Always take care of your brothers and always follow orders. You’d take the final test with your batchers at the end of it all. Our squad was top of the class,” his chin tipped up and he puffed out his chest proudly at the memory. “Once you pass your final test, you're shipped off to serve in the GAR. My first assignment was Geonosis, where I performed well and distinguished myself in the field. I was promoted to Captain and assigned to General Skywalker. And then, well, you know the rest.”

With the exception of the part in the middle where he’d graduated top of his class, his monologue had been pretty dull and emotionless, as though he were just recounting the facts of a battle that held no deeper meaning to him. Just facts, cut and dry, not meant to be celebrated or treated with any importance, merely necessary. But that was his _whole life_ until he’d entered the GAR, and he didn’t seem to consider most of it to be of any real significance. 

The injustice of it all hit her hard in the chest and made her almost wish she’d asked a different question.

She looked at him thoughtfully, part of her afraid to ask but the other part genuinely yearning to know. “I know you were always studying or training but did you, um, I mean-” she knew what she wanted to say, but she didn’t have the right words. She didn’t want to offend him with the question, “Did you, uh, have any time, you know, for fun? I mean, you know, to go out or...or anything like that…?”

He had stopped again and he was looking at her with that same look he’d worn just moments ago. Only this time it was deeper and more powerful, more intense. She swallowed. 

He blinked and the look vanished as he resumed walking, focused straight ahead now, each stride purposeful. “Some of my batchers would sneak out sometimes.”

She couldn’t help herself, “Did you- ?”

“No. No, no, no, I never did. We weren’t supposed to,” he said as if that settled the matter. “And anyway, uh…”

“And what?” She prompted gently after a sizable pause.

His hand was running over his short hair again, a gesture she now recognized as a sure sign he was nervous or embarrassed about something. “Well, they...they never invited me. I was... _different,_ and different for a clone is not a good thing.”

“What do you mean? There’s _nothing_ wrong with you Rex.”

“I know. I mean, I know that _now_ . But back then…” his sentence melted away as he lapsed into deep thought. She was just starting to think she should change the subject when he continued. His voice was quiet but unwavering and she could feel the hurt behind each word as though someone were carving it onto her skin with a vibroblade. “My hair. It- it’s different. Blonde. I was...undesirable. _Defective_. Blonde hair doesn’t serve any purpose so it wasn’t a trait that was...useful in any way. It just made me...well, an outcast I guess you could say. So, you know, I didn’t…” he released a deep breath and with it some of the pain of carrying this burden by himself for so long. 

“They never invited me. I don’t know if I would have gone or not. Never got the chance to find out.”

If her heart was cracked before, it split in half now, right down the middle. She didn’t know what to say.

She hesitantly reached out and placed her hand gently on his bicep, “I’m sorry, Rex.” His head turned slowly to face her. The look in his eyes was fierce and consuming now, searing into her again but the meaning was unreadable. “It’s their loss, Rex. Not yours.” Not wanting to risk making him uncomfortable, she broke the contact and continued walking, knowing he would follow when he was ready.

He remained rooted to the spot and she respected his privacy as he soaked in her words, hoping that he’d believe them as much as she did. After a long moment, she heard a few twigs snap and knew he was right behind her once again.

He cleared his throat. “Alright Ahsoka, your turn. Tell me about growing up as a jedi.”

**Rex’s POV**

Rex's goal for today had only been to march as far as they were able to, hunt for some food for them, set up camp for the night, and make it through all of these things without further embarrassing himself or further damaging their relationship. He thought he’d done a fair job of being respectful yet companionable while keeping his feelings in check. That is, until she asked him about Kamino.

Her query had confused him. At first he thought she needed that information for some mysterious reason. Maybe the Seppies had been mounting an attack on his homeworld before their crash? Maybe she had some plan involving the Kamino system to get them out of here? But he quickly came to the realization that it was none of those things. She had merely been curious. 

She'd wanted to learn more about him and his life. No one had _ever_ cared about that - _about him_ \- like that before. It did something really strange to his body. His stomach twisted and flipped and his whole body felt just a little...weightless somehow. Almost like just by asking that question, she’d physically peeled off some of his armor, leaving his body lighter. 

He’d been hesitant to talk about it at first but the more he’d divulged, the better he’d felt. Unburdened, lighter and just a little relieved maybe. And she’d _cared_ about it all. She’d cared about all of those tedious lessons and drills that were all his life had been growing up. She’d seemed interested - more so than he was, in fact. She cared...

_Like he was important to her._

He’d let her touch his arm, unaware that he even needed the contact until she took it away, leaving his arm cold, like it alone was exposed when all the rest of him was covered. He found that he missed her touch as soon as it was gone from his skin.

He’d asked her about her life growing up and listened with rapt interest as she told him how Master Plo Koon had found her on her homeworld of Shili and brought her to the Jedi temple on Coruscant. How she’d felt out of place there at first, like she wouldn’t be able to keep up with the younglings who’d been there longer. She went on to tell him about how General Kenobi had recommended her to be General Skywalker’s Padawan and how excited she’d been at the prospect, about her fierce need to prove herself worthy of that honor. 

He could relate to that. When he had initially been assigned as Captain of the 501st and General Skywalker’s first-in-command, he swore he’d do anything to honor the prestigious position he’d been given. He would give his life without hesitation or remorse at no more than a nod from his General if it meant his sacrifice would make a difference. 

They’d been talking for so long now that the sun had made its full rotation in the sky and was just beginning to kiss the horizon. He belatedly recognized that he hadn’t been paying the slightest bit of attention to where they were, nor had he made note of the best place to camp for the night. He hastily unclipped his helmet, pulled it on and dropped the rangefinder to survey the area. They had been following the stream, its meandering course leading them deep into the woods, but he could see a clearing just up ahead that would be an ideal spot to make camp. He led the way.

“Okay, I think this is the best spot we’re likely to find tonight to make camp,” he declared. “If you can gather wood and stones for a fire, I’ll see what I can do about dinner.”

“Sounds good,” Ahsoka nodded before scampering off into the trees. He smiled as he watched her go. She was so enthusiastic and put everything she had into whatever she did, even if it was the mundane task of gathering firewood. He respected that. He respected _her_.

He shook his head to clear his thoughts and scanned the area with his rangefinder. It was pretty deserted, for which he would have been thankful if his stomach wasn’t growling right now. Far in the distance he spotted a rustle in the bushes, a hint of movement and possible prey. Not breaking eye contact, he crept forward, his steps light and stealthy. As soon as it was in range, he crouched down behind some tall grass and took aim. He could see now that it was another pikobi. A little larger than the first but still a small example of the species. 

_Bdew! Bdew!_

Two shots just in case, but one was all it took. He heard the pikobi hit the ground and he made his way over to retrieve it. He picked it up and made his way back to the camp, looking longingly at the stream. It was still really hot, although the sun had now hidden itself halfway below the horizon. He’d been sweating all day and he was acutely conscious of that fact and all of the smells that accompanied it. The stream was looking more and more tempting until he finally convinced himself that he’d make use of it before dinner for a quick cleaning of himself and his clothes. 

It wasn't a luxury anymore; it really was necessary at this point.

He reached the camp and his eyes were met with the sight of Ahsoka kneeling near a large circle of stones with a heaping pile of twigs and sticks in the middle that were just beginning to crackle and smoke. He smiled. He couldn’t have been gone that long and she’d already made a perfect fire. He held up the pikobi for her to see, “Dinner is served!”

She laughed, the sound filling his chest with more warmth than the sun. “Pikobi again, huh? I think I'd better cook it this time,” she joked, winking at him.

He chuckled at that, the corner of his mouth curling easily up into a half smile, “You know kid, I’d argue with you if I didn’t think you make a good point.” He winked back at her. “It’s all yours.” He tossed it to her and she began to string it up above the fire to cook. “Listen, um, Ahsoka, would you mind if I head over the stream and clean up a bit? It’s been a long few days and I just-”

“You don’t need to get my permission, Rex,” she cocked her head at him. “Actually I was thinking the same thing. I really need to-”

“ _Ahsoka!_ We can’t-”

“I didn’t mean at the same time, Rex.”

“Ah. Right. Sorry, it’s just, uh, you know- I mean I thought-”

She mercifully cut him off with a deep laugh, “It’s _okay_ Rex, really. You know, it's only me. You don’t have to be so nervous.”

He swallowed thickly. It was no good. He knew he shouldn't be nervous but all he could think about now was her in that stream with him and that image was already taking over his mind and body. “I know, Ahsoka. I just wanted to make sure, um, you know…” he felt like a complete di’kut now, “Make sure i-it was okay. That you wouldn’t mind.”

She was looking at him in earnest now, like she could sense his reasons for being nervous. 

He really hoped she couldn’t. 

“Rex…” she began softly, tentatively, “Why are you so nervous?”

She was standing up now, her eyes fixed on his, searching. “No reason, Sir. _Ahsoka,_ I mean. I’m not nervous, just, uh, just hot and tired is all.”

She timidly took one step towards him and he felt as though he were trapped in a ray shield, helpless to move. “Rex, you can tell me.” He really didn't think he could. 

He swallowed again, “No, no I’m fine. Just need to get a quick wash to cool down and I’ll be good.” 

She bit her bottom lip, a fleeting glimpse of anxiousness passing over her features like a shadow, “Are you sure...” she trailed off, licked her lips and found her voice again, although it was so soft now he had to strain to hear it, “Are you sure you don’t... want me to come too?”

He couldn’t believe she just said that. He had to be imagining it. His brain was just in hyperdrive and hearing what he wanted to hear. She _couldn't_ have said that. 

_Could she?_

But she was slowly, timidly but resolutely moving in his direction now. His heart stopped in his chest, his breath paused in his lungs, and her words seemed to echo all around him, tempting him much more than the thought of cleaning up in the stream. He wanted to speak but his tongue couldn’t wrap around the words so he just stood there, adrenaline now burning through his veins like hot lava. He wanted more than anything to say yes. 

_He wanted so badly to say it_ …

He cleared his throat, the sound choked and dry even to his own ears. “I don’t think…” he lost his momentum as she took one more shy step. She was close now. He could feel all of the blood in his body now racing south as he hardened and throbbed beneath his blacks and codpiece.

“Rex…” she was so close now but it was barely a whisper and he needed to lean in to catch her words. He leaned in. Too close. She was too close now. Her lips were almost brushing his. He could touch her now with his mouth, his hands, with _anything._ She was so close. And _Gods he wanted to_ . With _everything._

He leaned in and touched his lips to hers. 

He was crackling, electricity shooting through his veins at her touch, just barely there, her skin tickling his lips. He felt lighter than air, like he needed to hold onto something, _tight_ , just to stay on the ground. He reached out and grabbed her waist and tugged her closer. She sighed and he pressed his lips harder against hers, unable to stop himself. His hands slid down to her hips and rested there.

He felt something wet slither along the seam of his lips. _Her tongue_. He closed his eyes, a moan now issuing from deep within his throat. He opened for her and let her inside. 

Her tongue was tentative and exploring, tracing every inch of his mouth and his own tongue before leading him into her mouth. He tilted his head to get a better angle and dove in. He tasted her eagerly. He even ran his tongue along her teeth to test their sharpness. She moaned back into his mouth and he gulped it down like it was air to fill his depleted lungs.

They pulled apart for no more than a few seconds to breathe but it felt like an eternity. _Too long._ His hands flexed on her hips and he drew her in again urgently. His kiss this time was more confident, his tongue instantly plunging into her mouth to dance with her own. Her hands came up to land on his shoulders, trying to find purchase on his bodyglove between his armor. Her fingers found the release for his shoulder plate.

She pulled back a fraction, “Rex, can I...“ 

He knew they shouldn’t. He knew this was probably a bad idea. But it was too late and he was in too deep now. He _wanted_ her to look, wanted her to touch. He didn’t want to stop and wasn’t even sure if he could anymore. All hesitation was gone. 

“Yes.”

She leaned back in and kissed him as she worked. The shoulder plates dropped to the ground with a _thunk_.

“Rex, your pauldron and- “

“Yes.”

He released her as she took his pauldron off over his head, then he claimed her mouth again, hungrier this time. 

She’d already given him a handjob and somehow groped him while she pleasured herself, but for some reason, her taking his armor off piece by piece was the absolute hottest thing he’d ever experienced. Even over those two kriffing amazing experiences. And that was saying a lot. 

His armor was so personal to him. All of his battle scars were painted proudly and ostentatiously along its surface, a constant reminder of all he’d been through, all of his accomplishments. It was one of his only possessions and he’d come to think of it almost as a second skin. Her touching that part of him was deeply moving. 

And also very, _very_ fucking hot. 

Her nimble fingers wedged their way in between the plates and then gently, almost reverently, lifted them away, baring more of him each time. Her fingers moved down, releasing his chest pieces and the vambraces on his arms. She slid off his gloves.

He was suddenly, inopportunely very conscious of the fact that it had now been a few standard days since he’d bathed. He was painfully aware that he probably smelled. He probably smelled very bad. He was alert to the fact that once she moved lower, she’d realize his body didn’t care about any of that and was standing at full attention for her. He wasn’t sure which was more embarrassing.

Part of him, a small part that was rapidly vanishing, would rather be any _where_ else and doing any _thing_ else than waiting and worrying about his smell and his beskar-hard dick. But that other and much larger part of him...well that part was way too karking enthusiastic about what was going on right now to be bothered by any of that. Surprisingly, that small worried part of him found the courage to speak up. 

He gently but firmly gripped her wrists, breaking the kiss softly as his head slid around her jaw so that the tip of his nose nuzzled her lekku. She shivered. His breathing was as ragged as his wild heartbeat, "Ahsoka, I don't want to stop - believe me I don't - but I really do need to wash."

She laughed at that, full and deep, which successfully ruined the mood, although honestly his confession is probably what actually killed it. But the sound was so lovely he found that surprisingly he was ok with that and he chucked with her. 

"I get it, Rex." She kissed his cheek, delicate, light and lingering, and then stepped back. "But maybe we can, um, finish this conversation later?" Her voice was shy and unsure, like she thought he might reject her invitation. He knew he probably should. But his blood was still diverting all of its supplies to his aching groin and he had no more capacity to deny her than he had to stop breathing. 

He nodded. She smiled. 

They separated, him awkwardly turning around, grabbing the robe and heading for the stream while she busied herself with the long-neglected pikobi just beginning to char over the fire. He chanced a parting glance over his shoulder and caught her looking at him. Her eyes darted swiftly back to the pikobi and he watched a deep red infuse her cheeks. He turned away and kept walking, a very rare self-satisfied grin pulling at his lips at the thought of making her blush. 

He reached the stream and wasted no time in removing the remainder of his plates and his blacks and stepping in. The water was cool but not as cold as he'd expected, which was a nice surprise. It was very deep in the middle but shallow at the bank and the sensation of its gentle movement as it washed over his hips was pleasant and soothing. 

He pulled his blacks in and scrubbed them as best as he could, centering his ministrations around the areas that had been drenched in blood and spattered with his cum. Once they were as clean as he could get them, he stepped out of the stream and hung them on a branch to dry. With that finally done he felt much better already, as though by rinsing the stains from his blacks, he was cleaning the slate of what had happened in the past few days. Cin vhetin. A fresh start.

Back in the calming water now, he took his time washing himself, contemplative and thoughtful. His erection had waned but it was definitely still present and back in the forefront of his mind now as his hands moved along his body. He should take care of it before he went back to the camp. He needed to be thinking with the head between his shoulders and not the head between his legs. Especially now. On the other hand, submitting to his urges is what had started this whole mess in the first place. But he couldn’t stop thinking about that kiss, about her removing his armor piece by piece, about her lips, her hands and...

His hand closed around his length. 

He groaned, the sound fighting free of his lips before he could strangle it, belatedly aware that she could likely hear him. But Maker help him, it felt so good. 

He _knew_ he shouldn't be doing this right now - shouldn't have been doing _any_ of the things he'd done tonight - but as his hand moved he forgot those anxieties for a moment, lost in the feeling of his release building inexorably under his determined fingers. 

"Copaani gaan, soldier?"

His hand shot out of the water so fast that a rush of water deluged his face and left him sputtering and coughing in the aftermath. He knew he shouldn't - just _knew_ he shouldn’t - but he did anyway. Hell, he’d already made so many poor decisions tonight, what was the harm in one more? He turned around to face her, most of his body still hidden beneath the dark water. 

He choked and sputtered afresh at the sight of her. She was wearing nothing but the blanket, wrapped around her like a towel. She was so slight that it twisted around her tiny frame twice with room to spare. The dull medium brown fabric shouldn't have been alluring, and yet the way it wound itself around her naked skin was easily the sexiest thing he’d ever seen. Ever. 

She was standing timidly on the bank of the stream, one leg bent and just behind the other, and looking like she didn’t know what to do with her hands where they hung loosely at her sides. Her eyes were looking into his but cast down demurely so that the effect was her peering at him through her eyelashes. While her voice had been confident when she’d spoken, her face and body language told a starkly different story. She looked small and scared but beautiful - _so, so beautiful_ \- and wanton. It was a strange combination, so oddly dichotomous that he was having trouble processing it. Although it could be that his brain had just shut down completely at her words. 

_“Copaani gaan, soldier?” Yes. Gods, yes, I would_ …

But that very small part of his brain that was still sparking and functioning on fumes told him that this was wrong. _Maker, he wanted to tell her yes_. He wanted to tell her so badly how much he wanted her, but this was wrong. And half of her didn’t look ready to follow through with it anyway. She may think she wanted this, but she didn’t look fully certain or fully ready for it. And that, more than anything made the decision for him.

He cleared his throat, “Ahsoka, I- I don’t think that’s a good idea.” His words sounded weak and unconvincing even in his own ears.

Still looking a little shy, but her words showed a surprising amount of confidence, “Why not?”

“Ahsoka, I don’t think- “

“Rex, what are you so afraid of?” She took a small step, dipping her toe in to test the water before her foot followed it into and then under the water. She was looking more self-assured now. Determined.

“I- I’m not afraid.” His voice was wavering just a bit now, vocal cords working hard to keep his tone even and level yet still failing. He was mesmerized as her ankles sunk into the water. 

This couldn’t be happening. Not to him.

“Are you afraid of _me_?” Her calves went under and she hitched the blanket a little higher so it wouldn’t get wet as she waded out. His eyes were wide and staring at her legs as they slowly submerged with her forward progress. “Why, Rex?”

“I’m n- not. Not afraid, Ahsoka.” He wasn’t even sure he was speaking. He had no idea how to curl his tongue around consonants and vowels and make them form words in Basic or any other language right now.

“Am I truly so scary?” Her thighs were lowering and the hem was lifting.

“N- n- no.”

“Then _why_ Rex?” Her hips went under along with her stomach, now smooth again as he caught a quick glimpse before it plunged below the surface. “Why can’t we?”

He swallowed thickly and licked his lips. Not even a stutter escaped this time. Because there were rules. Orders. 

Because he _wasn’t allowed_.

“A- Ahsoka.” He cleared his throat, “We...we can’t. _I’m not allowed_ . And you…” he lost his momentum as her chest went under. She raised her arms and tossed the blanket, now rolled into a ball, onto the bank where it landed safely on dry ground. He needed to get his words out. _Now_. Before he really did something inappropriate and out of line. “Ahsoka, listen, you don’t want this...not with me. And anyway, I can’t- “

“Rex, stop.” He stopped rambling but refused to look at her. They couldn’t do this. _He_ couldn’t do this. 

“Rex, do you want me?”

His heart was pumping so fast he felt like he’d explode at any moment. It was ticking like a bomb in his chest. He’d stopped breathing what felt like a full rotation ago and his whole body was shaking. It might have been nerves, it might have been stress, it might have been lust; he couldn’t tell anymore. He was wound so tight he knew he might snap and that was dangerous. _Very dangerous_. 

He heard her question but he didn’t know how to answer her. Yes, of course he wanted her. So badly that keeping his hands to himself right now was taking quite literally all of his energy. But it didn’t change the fact that _he wasn’t allowed_. 

“Ahsoka... _we can’t_ ,” he pleaded, his voice broken and tortured. His eyes still facing down in front of him witnessed her step closer. Close enough that her body under the water must be just inches from his own. He bit back the moan that threatened to leak out between his tightly closed lips.

“Rex,” her hand reached out and up to touch his jaw, tracing it softly with her fingers all the way around, her fingers curiously exploring the dark blonde stubble that had accumulated there. She leaned up further and he fought the urge to look and see if her chest had cleared the surface at the movement. Her warm lips brushed the shell of his ear. 

“Rex, _do you want me?_ ”

He should say no. He should step back. He should put as much distance between them as possible and resurrect some form of control over the situation.

“ _Yes_.”

He felt her smile against his jaw, “Good. Because _I want you too_.”

This time he did moan. He could no more hold it back than he could stop his heart from beating. He felt adrenaline course through his veins again, rushing through his body like wildfire. His hands, which had been white knuckled in fists at his sides, now shot out and seized her hips, pulling her closer and flush against his body. He knew she’d feel him, hard and throbbing against her stomach, but he didn’t care. Part of him really fucking wanted her to feel him. To gage how she really felt about what she thought she wanted right now. To make sure she understood what she was asking for. 

She gasped and he swooped his mouth down and onto hers to drink in the sound, savoring its sweet taste on his tongue. He kissed her hard, passionately and almost a little unhinged. It was like her confession had released something primal inside of him and now it was chanting, _Mate, mate, mate, mate._

He broke free of her mouth with a lewd and sloppy sound, forcing himself to calm down, to attempt to even out his breathing. He wasn’t some wild animal. He tried to regain control. 

“Ahsoka, what do you want?” His voice was so low and rough he almost didn’t recognize himself. Her eyes went wide at his tone and she gasped again. He smothered the urge to re-claim her mouth.

She licked her lips, seemingly unaware of what that action was doing to him, “I want you to touch me.” 

That was just too much. It was _too fucking much_ and it caused a low growl to vibrate in his throat. He didn’t even realize he’d done it until her eyes glazed over and she moaned. “Touch me, Rex.” She found his hand under the water and brought it to her front and guided it between her legs. _“Please.”_ Now he moaned with her, the growl still buzzing in the back of his throat, threatening to escape again.

Once she’d led his fingers fully inside her, she slid one of her long legs around his hip to give him deeper access. “ _Gods, Ahsoka_ ,” he moaned against her lekku as he sunk his fingers into her slippery warmth. She whimpered as his breath gusted across her sensitive skin there and it gave him all sorts of ideas. 

His head dipped down and he let his lips touch her lekku ever so lightly, watching her reactions closely. Her breath became a pant and her whole body shivered. That was all he needed to know. 

Keeping his touches here delicate and featherlight, he kissed along every blue stripe, his tongue slithered out to trace every vein running under and across it. His fingers moving at a steady pace inside of her and his tongue ever so slowly exploring each inch of her headtail. 

She was already writhing against him, grinding down onto his hand and imploring him to go faster. He obliged, two fingers now thrusting in and out of her frantically while his other hand re-emerged from the water to stroke her other lek gently and firmly up and down in a similar motion to what he’d been doing along his length before she’d arrived. 

She was whimpering now. He heard sounds he’d only imagined in his wildest fantasies panted from between her parted lips and he was drunk on them already. He wanted so badly for her to come undone at his hand, to feel her climax and hear her scream his name, letting this whole fucking planet know who had done this to her. 

He increased the speed of his fingers and her breathing sped up with it. He knew she was close. Both of her hands were on his shoulders, her nails digging into his skin there. She dislodged one now to slide it between them, attempting to help him bring her release. 

The hand that had been stroking her lek dove beneath the water and yanked her wrist away. “No,” he growled possessively. His deep warning tone made her gasp and it scared him more than a little. He forced the beast inside back into its cage and tried again, still gripping her wrist tight. “No. _Please_ let me. Show me - show me what you want.”

Breathing even more heavily at that, she shepherded him to her clit and showed him what she liked. He memorized everything she taught him, desperate to use this new knowledge to bring her over the edge. 

She removed her hand and he began moving immediately. The two fingers that were pumping in and out of her changed their angle slightly, causing her to whimper again, while his thumb began to circle her clit firm and fast. His head again dipped to her lekku and now began to leave wet, open mouth kisses on it as he made his way lower and lower. The hand that wasn’t deep inside of her came up to lift the tip out of the water and bring it to his mouth.

He sucked it in just as his thumb pressed down with just a tiny bit more pressure as it circled her clit and she froze. Her body began to tense and shake, her breath shallow and uneven and a tight, slippery pressure clenched hard around his fingers. 

He kept her lek in his mouth and his fingers inside of her, still pumping as he watched her climax. She was making small, stuttered sounds of pleasure between her spurts of breath and he could feel her essence coat his fingers as it rushed from her. She was so beautiful and he counted every lucky star in the galaxy that he was privileged enough to see her like this. That he was the one who had brought her to this.

As her reactions subsided, he gently removed his hand from her. As his arm breached the water’s surface, he could see her release still enveloping his fingers and he brought them to his mouth to taste her. He didn’t care if she saw him or what she might think. He was a man possessed and he _had_ to taste her. The taste was thick and satisfying in a way that nothing else he’d ever tasted was. Her eyes were wide, watching him lick his fingers clean of her.

His hand dove back down purposefully towards her center. “May I?” If possible, her eyes went wider at his obscene request, but she nodded and he groaned in relief that the answer was yes, his hand immediately parting her soft folds again to scoop up more of her and bring it to his waiting mouth. Her eyes watched him as he drank down as much as he could get of her. 

“Mm. _Maker,_ you taste so good.” He couldn’t believe he’d said it out loud, but her face told him he had. He was afraid he’d gone too far but then she clamped her arms around his neck, her body pressing against his fully, her breasts smashing into his chest, as she pulled his head down to her and captured his lips. 

He wasn’t sure what was more arousing to him right now: the memory of him tasting he, or the thought of her tasting herself now on his tongue. Either way, he moaned into her mouth and returned the kiss with every ounce of enthusiasm he had. Which was quite a bit.

Her hand made its way between them again, but this time, it gripped _him_ and he immediately moaned into her mouth at the mere touch. “You don’t have to,” he breathed harshly.

“I know. I _want_ to.”

He nodded and she began to move. He wasn’t going to last long. Her body was touching his all over. He could feel her nipples brushing his chest, one of her legs resting against the outside of his own and her hand on his length. She stepped in impossibly closer, now standing between his spread legs and bringing his throbbing cock as close to her as possible so that the tip of it occasionally bumped against her stomach as she stroked. 

He was moaning, gasping, and making any and all manner of indecent sounds now. She leaned forward to press her lips to his ear, both of her small hands now conspiring towards his release as one ran up and down his length and the other caressed his balls. She breathed, “Let go, Rex. _Just let go._ ”

He did. 

He couldn’t have held it back any longer if she’d offered him a million credits. He thrust into her wrist once, twice, three times, and spilled his hot seed into the water around them, the sound of his wrecked groan of release contained her name and with what little coherence he had left, he prayed she hadn’t noticed. 

She listened to his breathing, his grunts of pleasure and his body’s frenzied twitching, lengthening his pleasure and easing up when she could tell it was too much.

Eventually, his hand found hers and coaxed her to let go, his body completely sated and back under the rigid control he was normally master of. “Ahsoka…" 

There was so much he wanted to say. That it had been amazing. That _she_ was amazing. That she was incredible and smart and beautiful and _way_ _too_ _good_ _for_ _him_. That he didn't deserve her and she could do so much better. And that he didn't know what to do right now. That he was so scared he'd just ruined everything by giving in to what he'd wanted so badly for so long. That he suddenly felt lost and confused, unsure of himself and his decisions as he'd never felt in his life. 

"Ahsoka...we should...uh, we should get back.”

“Yes. I - I guess we should…”

It shouldn’t have been awkward, especially after what they’d just done, but it was all the same. In some faraway corner of his mind, he could tell he was fucking up right now, but it was like watching a burning Star Destroyer falling from the sky; he was helpless to do anything about it. He didn’t know what to say or do now. He needed some space to think, to process what they- no, what _he_ had just done.

He made his way to the bank, aware that she was watching him but with no option at this point but to get out, his full nudity on display for her, and put the robe on. He completed the task as quickly as he dared without trying to seem like he was rushing and then he made his way back to the camp, afraid to look back and afraid to wait for her.

He’d never done anything like that before and it was all really overwhelming. Now that his adrenaline was fading, he couldn’t stop the guilt that rushed back in to fill its place. 

She had been perfectly clear this time. She’d openly told him she’d wanted him. _But he still shouldn’t have._ Even if he looked past her rank, past his duty and his orders, what was left for them? Sure, it would all be fine if they stayed on this uninhabited middle-of-fucking-nowhere system forever and no one ever found out about it. But what would happen if he pursued this and they returned to Coruscant? He wouldn’t be allowed to see her like this, to have a relationship of any kind with her other than the acceptable one of Captain and Commander. So why open himself up to these emotions to have them ripped away from him as soon as they returned home?

_And what of what she wanted?_ Why would she even want to start this with him? He was just a clone. One unimportant man in a sea of millions just like him. _Expendable_. 

His thoughts were interrupted as she approached, her modesty hidden beneath the blanket once again. She looked a little sad and remote as she sat down across from him. 

“I’m sorry, Ahsoka.”

“For what?”

“I shouldn’t have- “

“Please, Rex, _don’t_ ,” she begged quietly. He could see tears filling her eyes. He didn’t want to hurt her. He _never_ wanted to hurt her. He wasn’t sure if it was his earlier actions or his words just now that had done this, so he closed his lips and said nothing, unwilling to make things worse.

He cut up the pikobi, which she’d taken off the fire before coming to find him, and handed the bulk of it to her. He wasn’t hungry anymore. He pretended to eat so that she would, but every bite tasted like sandpaper on his tongue. 

They ate once again in near silence, but this time was so much worse because he knew it was all his fault. He’d fucked things up _again_ only this time he didn’t know how to fix it. 

He insisted on taking watch tonight, and whether she’d agreed to it or not, it wouldn’t have mattered since there was no chance of sleep for him at this point anyway. But she’d agreed, so he situated himself in front of their fire and prepared for a very long and uncomfortable night.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Rex! Things were going so well and then he had to leave it like that... I had a lot of fun writing this chapter, especially the section on Rex's childhood on Kamino. Let me know what you all think and I'm off to the next chapter to see if he can dig himself out of this mess 😉


	5. Day 5 - A Step in the Right Direction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rex and Ahsoka each process what happened in the lake. Things take an unexpected turn that leads to a simultaneously great and disappointing conclusion for them

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you sushifish as always for your fantastic input and suggestions on this chapter! I couldn't have done this one without you!
> 
> Nope, I still don't own Star Wars or any of its characters. I'm just having a really good time torturing them 😉

**Ahsoka’s POV**

She was trying to sleep - she really was. She had actually even succeeded in drifting off for maybe an hour or so. But there was absolutely no chance she’d be able to stay asleep. Not tonight. She felt jumpy, adrenaline and nervousness racing through her as she thought about what had happened earlier that night. Or maybe it had been the night before? It was surely the next day now…

She sighed and sat up. If sleep was going to be impossible anyway, she intended to make the most of it. 

She stood, making sure the blanket was tucked securely around her, and made her way over to their pile of supplies and rations. She scooped up the parts and miscellaneous odds and ends that Rex had gathered from the crash site and laid them out where so could evaluate them. There were some electrical components which would definitely come in handy, some connectors, and bits of casing and wiring. 

It may just be enough.

She began to take them apart and then reconfigure them, testing each element as she went. She was on the right track, she knew it, but she wasn’t sure if what she had here would be enough. She might need more parts to connect all of it. She spliced in a wire to the core...

_Pfffzzzt! Pfffzzzt! Fhoooofh!_

_“Kriff!”_ she shouted as she frantically fanned a cloud of dark smoke from her face. “I almost _had_ _it!”_ The contraption she was building sputtered and sparked, the electrical portion of it completely fried and charred a rich black in the center, completely useless now. _“Kriff!”_

She could feel his eyes on her but she obstinately remained facing the other way. She was in a bad mood now from her failed attempt at a communicator and still more than a little hurt by Rex’s abrupt departure after their tryst in the stream. While part of her wanted to talk about it - wanted to just shake him and _make_ him tell her what he was thinking, to make him tell her what he _wanted_ \- another part of her realized that now wasn’t the best time since her feelings were still so raw and tender. She needed time to soothe them, to make sure she could handle whatever his answer would be before she asked the question.

She had been so sure he wanted her like she wanted him. And he’d seemed to… until he’d resurrected every wall he’d torn down, offering her no more than a parting glance before leaving her standing there in that stream alone, naked and vulnerable. But what was he so determined to hide from: her or himself?

To her surprise, she felt a hand hesitantly touch her shoulder. She froze.

“Ahsoka, you need your rest. In the morning we can-”

“Don’t you dare tell me what I need, _Captain_ .” As soon as the words had left her mouth she regretted them. The hand jumped from her shoulder as though burned and she heard him shuffle heavily away. She knew she shouldn’t have said it, but now that she had, it was like a fire had been ignited deep inside of her, spreading and smoking and desperate to break free. She stood and spun to face his retreating back, “And what about _you_ _?_ What do _you_ need, Rex?”

He stopped, his head still hanging down as if in repentance for having the nerve to touch her, for daring to speak to her. He didn’t even turn to face her, choosing instead to speak to the grass in front of him. “Nothing...Sir. I-I don’t need anything - anything at all. Nothing.”

She couldn’t stop the tears now but at least he wouldn’t see them as they fell. She bit her lip hard to trap her sobs inside as the tears marched in a line, in perfect formation down her cheeks, never ending and carving a deep trench in her heart as they went. _Nothing_.

She could feel that he didn’t really mean it. She could feel that he was hurt too somehow. Maybe even as deeply as she was. The sorrow and the hurt and the ever-present _fear_ rolled so easily off his tongue as he spoke. Either he wasn’t bothering to hide it from her or he couldn’t stop himself from revealing it. But Maker help her, she couldn’t find it in her to care about any of it right now. Why would he say that? _Nothing_. 

She wanted to speak, wanted to yell and _scream_ at the top of her lungs at him, but when she unclamped her teeth from her lip all that came out was a pitiful squeak of despair. Her body shuddered with the effort to contain her gasps of pain and frustration and she turned away, fell bonelessly to her knees by the fire and buried her head in her hands. All she could hear behind her was silence. She wasn’t sure he’d moved at all since he’d ripped her heart out with his declaration of ‘ _nothing’_ and again she found only a very small part of her cared at all. 

Her lip was bleeding where her fangs had punctured it. She didn’t care about that either. She let the blood drop with a splash onto the dirt patch in front of her and she unseeingly watched as it was slowly swallowed up by the earth along with all of her feelings.

She took a deep, steadying breath. Then another. Then another.

And one more as she reached out with the Force to ground herself against the tide of emotions threatening to drown her if she didn’t build a dam to hold them back again. 

Another deep breath. Another.

She put the dam together piece by piece. Here, holding back that look in Rex’s eyes as he’d allowed her to remove his armor. There, another piece to contain the feel of his hands in her most private places. Here, another piece to block the way his deep voice vibrated against her montrals as he’d allowed her to touch him. There, her feeling of completeness when they were together. 

Stone by stone and brick by painstaking brick, she built up the dam in her mind. She could feel the force of the almost overpowering waves of her feelings crashing against it, already chipping away at the fortifications she’d erected. She willed herself to build it stronger, larger, _impenetrable_. So formidable that nothing could get either in or out of it _ever_ again to cleave her in two. So that she could function again in this tortuous situation she’d gotten herself into. 

Because whether it was his fault or hers, and no matter what he said or did now, _she_ had started this whole mess. _She_ had touched him inappropriately first. Then, as if that wasn’t enough, _she_ had initiated a kiss with him. And as if she still weren’t satisfied, _she_ had sought him out when all he probably wanted was one blissful moment of privacy for himself and _she_ had practically thrown herself at him. Did it really matter whether he’d reciprocated? Did it matter that he’d seemed to want it too? 

In so many ways this sick and twisted pit she’d fallen into was her fault. That thought did nothing to dispel her anger and frustration at the whole thing. She’d been _so sure_ that he’d wanted it too. Absolutely kriffing _positive_ that he’d shared her feelings. That he’d felt the heat between them, that aching need to reach out and just take more.

_Nothing_.

Well, if that’s what he wanted then that’s what she’d give him. He wanted her to be his Commanding Officer and no more? 

_Well Captain, that’s just fine. That’s what you’ll get. And_ nothing _more._

Another tear, a long lost soldier from the first regiment that had come and gone, raced down her face, in a hurry to meet his brothers on the ground at her feet. She let it fall, let it join the pile of salty bodies in the dirt before it too disappeared as though it had never been. The only testament to its life and death was the wet stain in the dirt by her knees.

She was stronger than this. She was stronger than her emotions. She was a _Jedi_ and she wouldn’t let this defeat her. She ran her hands across her face, wiping away all evidence of her momentary weakness. Jedi weren’t weak - they were _strong_. _She_ was strong. Jedi didn’t form attachments. They weren’t allowed to. So she was doing the right thing by letting this thing go, whatever it was. Letting _him_ go. Rex had been right. It was _nothing_. It wasn’t allowed to be anything and he’d already tossed it away anyway like it was _nothing_ so what did it matter? It didn’t. It was _nothing_. 

_Nothing_.

She picked up the pieces of her ruined contraption and began to take them apart again. She laid them out in front of her, covering the wet spot that reminded her of her frailty moments ago. She didn’t want to see it. She sighed and looked over all the pieces again. She would make it work this time. She could do it. And then she could use it to get them the kriff out of here and back home where things made sense again. Back home where she had a purpose, and her life made sense and her heart was whole and unburdened by the trauma that these past few days had mercilessly carved into it.

She began connecting wires with purpose now, using the Force to feel where they might best fit, what might make them spark in the _right way_ this time _._ She was determined, focused. She _could_ do this. She could handle this. 

She could handle all of this.

**Rex’s POV**

If there was one upside to this situation, and he wasn’t at all sure that there was, it was that this time, he _knew_ where he’d fucked up. Yeah, he definitely karking _knew_ where he’d fucked up this time.

_Nothing_. 

He hadn’t really meant it that way...the way that it had come out...not at first. He’d only intended to imply that he hadn’t meant anything by touching her shoulder, by speaking to her, by encouraging her to rest as he knew she should. But once he’d said it, he just...he just hadn’t stopped or corrected himself. He probably should have. But once it was out there, a part of him, that fearful part deep inside of him, begged him to just _leave_ it out there. To leave it hanging in the air like a toxin, seeping into every molecule in the atmosphere and choking him with its noxious fumes.

He’d listened to that terrified and pleading part of him. _Take the easy way out_ , it said. _This is what you wanted, isn’t it? To push her away?_ It taunted, _No more complicated feelings you can’t handle, no more fear of crossing lines. No more fear..._

He could hear her behind him. While the noises she made were hushed and quiet, barely a breath of sound carried away on the wind, he’d heard them all the same. He’d heard them as though they were a cannon firing directly into his senses, bellowing and insistent, demanding that he listen. And so he had. His sharp ears had caught every smothered sob, every asphyxiated sniffle as though she were standing right in front of him, crying directly onto his shoulder. 

He wanted to _scream_ . He wanted to yell and shout, to howl and curse at whatever fate or being had seen fit to place him where he was right now and force him to deal with this. He _wasn’t made_ to understand these things! He was bred for _war_ , for _combat_ and hard battles on the field, not convoluted feelings and emotions that he had no idea how to process for things he _couldn’t even fucking have_. 

Things that he wanted so badly that without them - _without her_ \- it was almost impossible to breathe.

He’d hurt her with his thoughtless statement. He may be a complete di’kut but he did know that much. He hated seeing her hurt and knowing that it was _he_ who had done it...well, if his heart hadn’t already been ripped from his body and stomped on, that knowledge would have done it. 

But what else was he supposed to do? They couldn’t go on like this. There was no future for them. No chance at happiness. He was just a _clone_ and she was a Jedi. Not only was it forbidden on _every_ level that it possibly could be, but she deserved better. 

She may think she wanted him but she really didn’t. She _couldn’t_. If she found his face attractive, well, there were _still_ countless better choices than him. Fives was much more confident and self-assured. Tup was kinder and more thoughtful than he was. Kix was smarter. Echo was more loyal. Jesse was more level-headed. Hardcase was much more fun and outgoing. He, Captain Rex, was nothing special, not even for a clone. There was nothing special for her to see in him.

He heard her fall to the ground and he chanced a rushed glimpse over his shoulder. She was kneeling with her back to him, head in hands. _Maker,_ he couldn’t take this. Maybe he’d done the wrong thing after all. If she was this upset, didn’t that mean _something?_ And she’d been so determined to kiss him, seemed to really want…

He cut off his line of thinking before it could proceed further. There was no sense in thinking about it now. He’d fucked it up again, only this time maybe it was for the best. But he wasn’t so sure anymore.

His answer to her question hadn’t obliterated the fear or the anxiety or the doubt. In fact, these feelings were now more present than ever. His fear over breaking rules and crossing lines was simply replaced with an even more desperate fear that he would lose her - as a friend or...whatever this was. His anxiety and doubt had multiplied tenfold only now he was anxious and horrified that he’d hurt her and he doubted that he’d made the right decision. 

He felt way worse than he had at the beginning of his guard duty, which he had thought was impossible at the time. 

He heard her working with her contraption again, metal and wiring clanking and sputtering. Maybe he should say something? But what? Try to undo what he’d done or just try to ease the ache of it but let it stand? He swallowed hard and turned around to face her. He still didn’t know what he planned to say but he knew he needed to say something.

“A-Ahsoka?” His voice was weak and hesitant, testing the waters before he waded further in.

A beat.

“Yes, Captain?”

Not good. But he deserved that.

“I -” He wasn’t sure what he wanted to say. Actually, maybe he wanted to say too many things at once. Either way, his brain shut down and he felt like he was manually rebooting it right here in front of her mid-sentence. “I, uh… May I help you with that?”

_What the fuck?_

She looked as confused as he was. Of all the stupid, thoughtless, _pointless_ things to say - 

“Um...sure. I guess. That’s fine.”

Now he really had no choice but to sit down beside her, more than a little anxious and afraid, and not having a karking clue how to help her with the gadget she was building. 

_I’ll probably fuck that up too._

“Do you know what you’re doing?” It was as if she were reading his thoughts.

“Uh, not really, no. But I want to help. Just tell me what I can do.” He hadn’t meant for this sentence to come out this way either, but it was kind of perfect in a way. He didn’t know what he was doing but he did want only to help. With her gadget and with whatever their relationship was right now. He hoped she’d pick up his clue here. _Please Maker let something go right tonight…_

“Here, hold this.” She lobbed a couple of split wires into his hands - careful, he noticed, not to touch him. His stomach dropped to his feet but he had a hard time telling if it was from relief or disappointment. It felt like a very odd and uncomfortable mix of both that was currently tying his stomach in knots.

They sat in silence for what felt like a full rotation, him holding or handing her things as she asked for them and her working diligently to splice them together into a working mechanism. He hadn’t dared to disrupt the delicate peace that they’d built here but his mind was now fervently prodding him to say something, _anything_ , to her. He really had no idea if that would make things better or worse. 

“Um...Ahsoka…” he trailed off when she didn’t look up from the odd shaped screw that she was trying to insert into a hole entirely too small for it. He cleared his throat timidly and tried again, “Ahsoka. Listen, about what I said earlier -”

Still not looking up from her work and with a voice that was devoid of emotion, she answered him, “There’s no need to explain. You answered my question. You don’t need to -”

“Ahsoka, I -”

“I _said_ I don’t need to hear it, _Captain_.”

He dropped his eyes and a defeated sigh escaped his lips. “Okay...Ahsoka.” He probably should have said Sir or Commander. May as well get back to that comfortable and familiar Captain and Commander footing where they belonged. But now that he was on the precipice, he found that he didn’t want to give up calling her Ahsoka. Her name on his lips was so beautiful and he didn’t want to part with it. 

“May… May I still call you Ahsoka?”

She did finally look up at him at that, and behind the mask of indifference he thought he saw a flash of sadness, or regret or some other similar hurt emotion. It was so fleeting he didn’t have time to dissect it. She seemed to be chewing on his words, tasting each syllable before deciding what she thought about it as a whole. She spoke slowly, as though deciding whether or not to pull the words back in once they’d left her mouth, “Yes. Yes, that’s fine.”

“Thank you.” He didn’t know why he said it. Maybe he just needed her to know that he really did appreciate it. Her fingers froze where they were twisting two wires together for a beat and he thought she might respond. But then her fingers resumed their efforts and everything fell back into the uncomfortable rhythm they’d established when he’d first walked over to her.

He quietly watched her toil with the makeshift communicator that she was building before he had an idea. “Ahsoka, I have an idea,” he said gently. She didn’t look up, but she gave a noise that indicated she’d heard him and he had her permission to proceed. 

“Use my armor. Maybe there’s something you can take from my vambraces or my helmet that will help you.” Her fingers had frozen now and she met his eyes. He saw that fleeting look pass over her eyes again and this time he was sure it was regret. But what did she regret? He continued on, holding her eyes, unwilling to part with them until she took them away. “I mean, it isn’t much use to me here and if you could use something from it...well, take it. It’s yours. If - if you want it, that is.”

The air was heavy between them again suddenly. He could almost see her pulse pounding against the long line of her throat. He wanted so badly to kiss her again. To kiss all of her. But she wasn’t speaking so he ran his hand over his blonde hair nervously. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, she spoke. “Why are you offering me this?” He could tell she was choosing her words here very carefully. “Your armor...it's so _personal_ to you. I know it is...I know what it means to you. Why would you let me take it apart and maybe ruin it like I did the first time I tried to build this...this thing?” She frustratedly threw the tiny steel machine down on the ground in front of her.

Still holding her eyes, he said honestly, “Because you need it.” Her eyes welled up and he swallowed thickly but held on tight to her stare, “And because I know you can do it.” He picked up the beginnings of a communicator she’d put so much effort into and placed it delicately in her palm, his fingers whispering across hers and sending a spark of heat racing down his spine. He pulled his hand quietly back, unwilling to again ruin the fragile peace they’d created. “It doesn’t matter if it's personal to me or not. If you need it and I can give it, then you can always have it. You only need to ask.” 

She was right. His armor was personal to him. In fact, it was probably the most important possession that he had. But he had meant what he’d said. If she needed it, she could have it. And if she needed it to build a communicator because it would make her happy to get off this kriffing system, well, then she could have it. And he did know she could do it. She could do anything she put her mind to. 

Her reply was so soft he barely heard it as it left her lips, “And what if what I want is you, Rex?”

He saw the tear as it parted from her eyelashes to glide gently onto her cheek and he reached out to catch it without a second thought. He brushed it away and heard her breath catch. “Ahsoka…”

“Please, Rex...tell me what you want. What you _really_ want.”

“Ahsoka, I -” She was moving closer. Just a small scoot really, but it was enough so that now her bare leg brushed against his own. His stomach flipped over a few times in his gut before sending a burning crackle of arousal directly to his cock. He swallowed thickly. His tongue felt as heavy as durasteel and it was just as unwieldy to move right now. But she was waiting for his response. He tore his wide eyes from that glorious stretch of skin where they were touching to focus instead on her own bright and watery blue eyes.

He knew he should tell the truth here and Maker help him, he _wanted_ to. He wanted to so badly. But he was so terrified to cross that line. Not that he hadn’t already crossed some lines but really, if he gave her the answer that he wanted to here and now, there would be no turning back. It would be out there for her, not just at this moment on this system, but at all times and everywhere he went. He decided to ask a question of his own before he jumped off this cliff and into the dangerous waters below.

“Ahsoka, why do you want me?”

She looked stunned and a little hurt by his question.

_Ah, Sithspit, have I just fucked up again?_

“Are you really asking me this right now, Rex?”

He was pretty sure that ‘ _yes’_ wasn’t the right answer here but it was the truth. “Uh...well, yes. I just -”

“Really, Rex?”

“Well….um, I mean, Ahsoka I...I,” He sighed and just let it out, “I just don’t get it.” She was looking at him like he’d suddenly grown a lightsaber out of the side of his head. “Ahsoka really, I mean okay, maybe it’s a stupid question to _you_ but honestly it’s not to _me_. I swear, I _really_ don’t get it. I mean, I’m _not anything special_ , I’m not _unique_...I - I’m not _anything_ really. I’m just a clone! Just one in millions - maybe fucking _billions -_ with the same face, the same eyes, the same -”

She sat up on her knees and pressed her lips to his. Her hands had moved to either side of his face and held him gently there. It was different from the kisses that they’d shared so far. This kiss wasn’t tentative and afraid like their first kiss. It wasn’t hot and insistent like their kisses in the stream. It was all of those things and much more somehow. It was _everything_.

He sighed against her and kissed her back. He had no idea how long that kiss lasted. It could have been hours and it could have days. It could have been seconds although he was sure it wasn’t. All he knew was that he never wanted that kiss to end. He still didn’t know why she wanted him but it was clear that it _was_ him that she wanted. And that was enough for him.

He was suddenly very conscious of the fact that she was still in just a blanket and he was in a loose Jedi robe. That thought sent another shudder of arousal through his body to settle in a very sensitive spot between his legs. He pulled back the tiniest bit and softly gripped her wrists before gently breaking the kiss. “Ahsoka,” his voice was low and husky, as eager as the rest of his body for her, “Ahsoka, what do you want?”

She gave a breathy laugh. “Uh-uh. You’re not getting out of this one again. I asked you first. So you tell me, soldier: What do you want?”

He wasn’t sure he could. He wanted _everything_. Or _anything_ she chose to give him. He wanted it all but he would have been content with another kiss. He chose a nice, safe middle ground. “Your lips. I want your lips, Ahsoka.” 

She was kneeling in front of him, their knees almost touching, not even an inch between them. She closed that gap now, her knees moving to press fully against his. He wanted to reach out and pull her even closer but he didn’t. This was her challenge, her call to make. 

She leaned forward, her lips just brushing against his own. He opened his mouth to deepen the kiss but she moved away, kissing delicately and featherlight along his scratchy jaw and around to his ear. “Just lips, Captain?” Her use of his title while her hot breath tickled his ear was nearly the end of him. She kissed the shell of his ear and then down to the lobe. “Tell me, Rex. Tell me what you want…”

His throat wasn’t working. His brain had shut down. He was sizzling and sputtering like a fried clanker inside. “L-lips. Lips, tongue, mouth…” 

Her tongue came out immediately at his bidding to flick across his earlobe before sucking it into her mouth, hard. He groaned, the sound lewd and dirty but he was beyond caring right now. “Mm. And _where_ do you want my lips, tongue and mouth?”

“ _Gods,_ Ahsoka…”

“Mm-mm. I’m afraid you’ll have to tell me, trooper.” 

“Lower.”

She kissed and licked along his jaw before nuzzling his head up to kiss the sensitive skin under his chin where it met his throat. “Here?”

“Lower.” Her tongue was leaving a wet trail down his neck and she’d made it about halfway down before he could stop himself. “ _Teeth_. Teeth…”

She bit him, her fangs nipping his skin not hard enough to draw blood but still hard enough to hurt. When she spoke her voice showed its first notes of hesitancy since she’d initiated this little game, “Like that?”

His breathing was so shallow and uneven, he thought he might black out. “ _Yes_. Yes, just like that.” He wanted to close his eyes, to relax into the pleasure, but at the same time he wanted them open, unwilling to miss a thing. He settled on eyes open. She nipped his throat again, lower and close to his shoulder. He shivered. “Harder.” She bit the same spot, hard enough to draw tiny pinpricks of blood this time. _“Fuck_ , Ahsoka!”

“Is that what you want?”

“ _Gods_ , Ahsoka…” He almost said yes. It wouldn’t have been a lie. _Maker yes,_ that was what he wanted. But not yet at least. “Lower, Ahsoka.”

“Yes, Sir.” He moaned hard at that, his warm breath gusting erratically across her montrals as she dipped her head to kiss along his collarbone. “Should I keep going? I’ll need to take your robe off...”

He paused at that but the voice inside whose job it was to promote great and terrible choices said _fuck it_ and he didn’t have enough other functioning brain cells to argue with it. 

“Yes.” 

She reached down to his middle and untied the robe, her fingers curiously straying just far enough afield to brush ever so slightly against his heavy and swollen length where it rested on his thigh. He drew in a sharp breath. “I’m sorry -”

“No, it’s okay. It was good. It’s just, um, really sensitive right now.”

“Oh. Okay.” She began to pull open his robe and his hands met hers to help her pry it open. He let it fall to the ground around him and then let his arms drop back to his sides, allowing her to take him in. He should have probably felt nervous or afraid but for the first time tonight, he felt comfortable. He felt safe with her. 

She took a moment to look him over, her gaze wide eyed but smoldering at the same time, a strange but enticing combination. Her eyes landed in the center of his chest, where a starburst shaped scar adorned his flesh and a heaviness overtook her features. She bent her head to the scar and kissed it tenderly. It felt as though that kiss melted into his skin, found passage along his veins and warmed his heart.

His hands found purchase on her cheeks and coaxed her to raise her head up to his. He captured her lips in an urgent kiss. Something about her gesture, the concern, the caring, the love he felt from her in that moment was like a spark on the starfuel in his chest. In his kiss he tried to tell her everything he’d failed at so miserably with words the past few days. How special she was, how fortunate he felt to be here with her right now, and how much he cared for her. The kiss was fiery and emotional, too much tongue and a little too hard and desperate, but he gave her all he had in it. The good, the bad, the unsure. Everything.

They were both out of breath when he finished.

“Wow...that was…” she started.

“I know, I know.”

“Can we...is it ok if we, um, keep going?”

“Yes.” 

She kissed him again on the lips, but this time it was easier, less hurried. The same desperation behind every pass of their tongues over each other, but in a quieter way. They had all night. She slowly parted her mouth from his, her teeth tugging on his lower lip before they separated. She kissed his scar again. “Now...where were we?”

“Mm...lower. You were going lower.”

“Oh, I see. Then I’d better keep going.” Her lips and tongue blazed a wet path across his chest until her lips closed around his nipple and she began to lick and suck. “Teeth,” he choked out. She nipped it, not hard really, but with enough pressure to startle him. “ _Yes.”_

“You like rough?”

“Yes.” He knew he should probably have been embarrassed but he really couldn’t bring himself to care about decency or propriety or really anything right now other than the feel of her curious mouth exploring his skin. She grazed her teeth over his nipple again and his whole body jerked. “ _Yes.”_

“Lower?”

“Lower... _gedet’ye…_ ”

“Yes, Captain.” The moan that came out of his mouth at that sounded filthy even to his own ears.

“You like that? When I call you _Captain?_ ”

“ _Fuck yes_...”

“Mm...good to know, trooper.” He shuddered hard and her mouth resumed its slow and leisurely path down his clenching stomach, pausing here and there when she found a spot she found particularly interesting. The long jagged scar that cut across his lower abs, the small blaster mark at the top of his right hip, the now smooth skin on his thigh where the large gash from their starship crash had been just days before. She stopped at all of those places to mark her passing with a delicate and reverent kiss.

His breathing was so labored and shallow by the time she’d reached his cock that he was sure he was going to pass out. The first thing he felt was her breath, warm and light as it whispered along his throbbing length. The next thing he felt was her lips, gentle and featherlight, barely brushing the leaking head. Almost the ghost of a sensation. Finally he felt her tongue, tentatively peeking out to scoop up his precum before retreating back into her mouth.

She lifted herself back up so that her head was level with his again. “Mm, you taste so good.” He couldn’t take it anymore, he lunged forward, gripped her waist to haul her up against him, and he kissed her. It started off rough and desperate, his heart throbbing as frantically as his cock. He felt like if he didn’t taste her, hold her right now, there wouldn’t be enough air in his lungs to keep living. 

As he slowly came to realize that this wasn’t a dream, that she was here with him now, he relaxed, his tongue slowing its rhythm and his hands loosening around her waist. He released her and rested his forehead against her own, his breathing still ragged but calming. “Ahsoka…”

“Hm?”

“I want you, you know I do, but what do you want?”

She looked really confused now. “What do you mean, what do I want? You can’t tell?”

He huffed out a laugh at that. “No - I mean yes. Yes I can tell that you want me. I mean, I can tell what you want with me. But what I meant was, what do you want, um, for us? You know, I mean, where do you want this to go? I - I mean…” He was running his hand through the short bristly blonde hairs on his head now, his unease evident, but he needed to get this out. He needed to understand what he was getting into and what she wanted to get into. Thankfully, she put an end to the banthashit spouting from his mouth and took over the conversation.

“Rex, I don’t think we have to figure all of this out in one night, you know? I know I’ve liked you for a long time.” She kissed his cheek, sincere and sweet. “I know I’ve wanted you for a long time.” She kissed his lips again, slow and tender, letting her meaning, her honesty, sink in. “I don’t want to think about anything else tonight. I just want to enjoy it with you.” She kissed him again, her kiss this time heated and passionate. 

He responded with enthusiasm, his hands gripping her waist again and pulling her back against him. Her gasp spurred him on and he began to trail hungry wet kisses down her neck. She tilted her head to the side to give him better access and he sank his teeth into her pulse point hard enough to bruise. Her hands shot up to grip his shoulders. “Do you like rough?” he rumbled against her lek. She whimpered and nodded. He smirked, “You need to tell me, Commander…”

“Yes! Yes, you evil man!” He chuckled, low and deep, letting the sound vibrate against her neck. “More, Rex…”

“More what?”

“You really are terrible, you know that?” His chuckle resonated along her collarbone and he felt her shiver.

“Tell me,” he insisted.

She smirked. “Lower.”

His smile stretched at that. “I’ll have to take off your blanket for this…”

Her hands whipped up in a frantic attempt to do it for him and he caught her wrists. He smothered her huff of indignation in his mouth with a quick kiss. “No. Let me...please.”

She lowered her hands and he kissed her cheek softly. As his fingers slipped under the top of the blanket and hooked around where she had it tied together, his mouth slid over to her lek. He let his lips and tongue brush along it soothingly as he guided the blanket off her body. She shivered as the blanket tumbled down and he pulled her closer to him.

His tongue caressed a winding path all the way down her lek before flicking the tip gently. She moaned wantonly at that. “Rex…”

“Say my rank...please, Ahsoka.” 

“ _Captain_...please...I want you…”

His hands gripped her hips hard and he yanked her into his lap, her legs on either side of his thick thighs. “Where,” he growled against her nipple as he teased it with his teeth. “ _Where_ do you want me?”

She was whimpering in earnest now and he wasn’t sure he’d be able to last another minute in the state he was in. Her hand made its way down from his shoulder, tickling along his still sensitive ribs and further, to wrap around his weeping member and pump him a few times. He groaned in both relief at the contact and strain at trying to hold back.

“Give me your hand, Captain.” He slid his hand down her waist and around her stomach and she took it from there, tugging his hand between them and shoving his fingers into her. He moaned again, the sound tortured and needy, something he should have been embarrassed about had it been any other time in his life. “I want you here.”

He began to move his fingers and she immediately moaned with him. He had to swallow thickly to get the words out, “Fingers? Tongue…?”

She moaned against his neck where her head had fallen. Her hand pumped more urgently along his length. “All of you, _Captain_.”

“Yes, _Sir…_ ” he growled against her montrals. He reached between them with the hand that until now had been clutching her tiny waist and he seized her wrist, stopping her delicious strokes. Her hand retreated back up to his shoulder as he lined himself up with her entrance. “Are you sure, Ahsoka?” He made sure that his voice was as even as he could make it, although he couldn’t keep the deep husky timbre from rumbling through his words.

“Yes, Rex. Yes Captain... _please_ …”

He pushed in, just the head and a tiny bit of the length really, and they both sighed simultaneously in relief and pleasure. He held on to her hips to keep her from moving, not wanting to hurt her or move faster than she was ready for. Once he could feel her body adjusting to him, he pushed in just a bit further, beads of sweat now dotting his skin as he fought every urge and forced himself to hold back. Just a little more. Then just a bit further than that. She was writhing against him now, trying to push down, and it was all he could do to hold her still above him. He took his time, letting her adjust, until finally he was all the way in and her hips were flush against his own.

She rolled her hips experimentally and he threw his head back in pleasure. She took the invitation and bit his neck. The intense pleasure and pain of it took him by surprise and his hips jerked up and into her hard. She gasped, taking just a beat to adjust before raising herself up and dropping back down on his length. They both moaned at that. “I’m ready, Rex.”

He needed no further prodding. He gripped her hips in earnest now, fingers digging into the tender flesh there as he snapped his hips up at the same time she came down. They quickly found a rhythm, fast, urgent and _perfect_. Maker, he’d never felt anything so perfect in his life as the two of them joined together. 

He was close, the pleasure of her body enveloping his was already almost too much to take. His whole body was trembling, taut and humming like an electro-whip and ready to snap as he pistoned into her. He could feel the deepest part of her pulsing around him and he knew he wasn’t going to last much longer. 

“Ahsoka…” It was completely destroyed and desperate as it was ripped from his vocal cords, a plea and maybe an apology rolled into one. He wasn’t sure if she heard him or not. Her head was thrown back and she had increased her pace against him, small sounds of pleasure leaking out from between her parted lips in a continuous string as she moved. He needed her to come first. He would cut off his leg right now before he would disappoint her.

He wrapped one of his arms around her shoulders and deftly flipped her onto her back with him now above her, never missing a thrust. He could feel she was close as he hammered into her welcoming heat. He pinched his eyes closed, trying to block out the sounds, the sensations, the overwhelming and all-consuming need he now felt to sate himself deep inside her. 

“Rex…” His heart was frantic, his hips like a battering ram against her own. He was so close. _Come on, Ahsoka…_

“ _Yes_...Captain...right there...so close…” she panted against his ear. 

He was fighting his climax with everything he had in him but he knew it wouldn’t be enough. His body was no longer under his control. She was close but he was closer. As her nails raked down his back, leaving angry red welts in their wake, he bucked once, twice, three more times and finished inside of her with a groan of her name entwined with ecstasy and relief.

Almost as soon as those feelings had come, they were washed away in a tide of guilt and embarrassment. She hadn’t come. He was sure he felt her disappointment although she didn’t show it on her face as she held him close to her, kissing him gently and allowing him to ride out the waves of pleasure that were still crashing over him, drowning him.

One of his hands had been braced on the ground, holding himself up above her while the other had been on her hip keeping her close. He shifted his body so that he was now kneeling between her legs. His eyes locked onto her own, regret, inadequacy and humility all reflected for her to see. “I - I’m so sorry Ahsoka.” One of his hands swept gently along her outer thigh, making its tentative way inwards. “May I…? _Please._ ”

She nodded. Her breathing was still heavy and he could still see the desire smoldering in her eyes but it wasn’t the same passion from a moment ago when she’d been right on the edge of that precipice with him and he’d abruptly pulled her back from it, ascending the peak without her.

His fingers went straight to work plunging in and out while his thumb made insistent circles over her clit. It didn’t take long. Why couldn't he have held out just one more minute? He bent his head and kissed her as she climaxed, the sigh of her completion rushing into his lungs as her moisture coated his fingers while she spasmed around him. Despite the feelings of satisfaction and contentment now radiating off her, he still felt...disappointed. Not in her but in himself. Like he’d let her down.

Later that night as he lay there next to her, still naked but shielded by the blanket, her arm draped easily over his chest, he couldn’t help but wonder for what felt like the millionth time since they’d crashed here: Had he made the right choice?

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I live to read your comments and thoughts and I can't wait to hear your reaction to this chapter!


	6. Day 6 - A Ripple in the Force

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ahsoka and Rex enjoy a comfortable morning until a disturbance in the Force threatens to disturb the peace they'd only so recently earned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Star Wars or any of the characters 😭
> 
> A HUGE thank you to sushifish! I always appreciate her help looking over my chapters before I post, but with this one especially I truly appreciate her time and encouragement 💗
> 
> There is a TON of Mando'a in here so here's a cheat sheet:
> 
> mesh’la - beautiful  
> cyare - beloved  
> cyar’ika - darling/sweetheart  
> Gaan - hand  
> Lalat - tongue  
> Edeemir - bite  
> Dral - strong/powerful  
> kotep - brave  
> Cabur - guardian/protector  
> Edee - teeth  
> Kar’ta - heart  
> kar’taylir - hold in the heart  
> Baar - body  
> Kandosii’la - stunning/amazing  
> Cetar - kneel in submission  
> Copad - desire  
> Mureyca - kiss  
> Jatisyc - delicious  
> B’Alor’ad - My Captain  
> Gedet’ye - please  
> Ke’pare! - Wait!  
> Vaii - where  
> Me’copaani, Alor’ad? - What do you want?/What would you like? Captain  
> O’r - in  
> Ni ceta - sorry (lit. I kneel) groveling apology  
> Tion’jor? - Why?

**Rex’s POV**

He was back on Kamino, taking his final test. He was running, firing his blaster, hitting every target dead center, leading his batchers in the attack on the fortress. He ducked behind a barricade and motioned for his team to split up, a few flanking him on the right and the others watching his back. He always went first. They held their position, waiting for Rex to give the signal. 

He had just raised his arm when all of a sudden the barricade he was hiding behind wrapped around him and began to tighten. His brothers didn’t seem to find it strange that durasteel would bend like this, nor did they make any move to help him get out of it. In fact, in unison, they all shrugged their shoulders and began to walk away, leaving him there alone, struggling valiantly to free himself. 

He called out to them for help, pleaded with them, ordered them to come back, but it was no use. Not one of them stopped.

“Duty calls, vod.”

“You got yourself into this one. It’s your test to get yourself out.”

“You’re going against orders, brother.”

“I’m a good soldier and I honor my code.”

There was more muttering but he’d stopped listening, putting everything he had into wriggling free. He’d just managed to extricate one arm when he felt something under the durasteel slither down and around his leg. It felt solid but soft and it was rubbing against him gently and persistently. Maybe some kind of snake? 

He sucked in a breath, fear turning to adrenaline and beginning to course through his veins. He tried to kick it away but he had a very limited range of movement and the mass was insistent, winding around his leg at the hip and holding him in place. The harder he struggled, the more firm its hold became.

As he twisted and writhed uselessly, he felt another smooth protrusion slide across his chest and pull him in deeper. The serpents, or whatever they were, were moving now, slithering across his body sensually. One of them rubbed up against his cock lightly, sliding back and forth across it assertively. He tried but failed to suppress his moan, horrified that such a sound had escaped him in this highly dangerous and very inappropriate situation. Meanwhile, the other was moving along his chest, almost caressing him before grazing his nipple with its sharp teeth.

His heart was beating so fast now from arousal as much as adrenaline that he thought it might burst. In fact, it felt as though both sensations had melted together to create something that was setting his body on fire. 

The barricade no longer felt cold, hard and solid, it was scratchy and it was in the way. He was able to kick it off now without issue and he watched it slide easily from his body, no more than a blanket, as it fell on the floor at his feet. 

His armor and blacks had disappeared, leaving him completely exposed to whatever these creatures chose to do. He forced himself to look down and his eyes widened in surprise to find that they weren’t creatures at all but hands - small and curious sienna hands.

His eyes shot open and he found Ahsoka still sleeping curled up against his side, her leg entwined with his own and her hands in almost exactly the same places as in his dream: one on his chest with her fingernails brushing his nipple and the other on his hip bone, dangerously close to his very interested erection. 

He swallowed thickly, his throat parched and his tongue as heavy as that durasteel barricade he’d so recently been trapped behind in his dream. He closed his eyes again and fought to rein in his rapidly beating heart, his uneven breathing, willing his body back to reality one particle at a time. 

He’d nearly succeeded when he felt her stir against him, the hand on his chest curling further around him, her arm creeping lazily further across his chest, grazing his sensitive nipple as it went. He couldn’t suppress a shudder at the contact and it was a fight not to reach up and grab her wrist. 

“Mmmm,” she murmured contentedly from somewhere against his neck. His heart was pounding again, alarmingly aware of her proximity, the placement of her hands, their nakedness and what his body wanted to with all of those things. It wasn’t that he was unwilling to bend to his body’s desires. Maker help him, he was willing but he was still riddled with guilt over his performance last night. 

She had entrusted him with something so precious and special and he had let her down, racing toward his own pleasure and leaving her behind, gasping and begging to come with him. He wondered idly whether that had been her first time...whether he’d been her first… 

Fuck if that wasn’t a sobering thought. A large helping of carbonite seemed to fill the pit in his stomach as he contemplated that. He fervently hoped that he wasn’t her first sexual experience… But no sooner had that thought found purchase in his mind, than another sensation overtook it: possessiveness. As much as he didn’t want his lackluster performance to be her first experience in that department, the thought of her being with anyone else made him almost literally growl. The thought of  _ anyone _ touching her as he had, of  _ anyone  _ else being inside her like that, released this monster from deep in the core of him that he had never even known existed. 

He was having a hard time rationalizing these feelings, especially after all he’d been through last night. 

His entire life he’d been taught - no, he’d been indoctrinated to believe - that his existence was to be no more than that of a successful clone Captain of the GAR if he was lucky, and cannon fodder if he was unlucky. He had learned not to resent or to argue with this logic. It wasn’t right or wrong: it simply was. He wasn’t to have rights or privileges beyond the occasional visit to 79’s or his own small but private Captain’s quarters. He didn’t have personal possessions aside from a holo or two. Even his armor was property of the GAR. Hell,  _ he _ was property of the GAR. These were just the facts of his life. Facts that he and every other clone had come to accept at an early age. That’s just the way it is. This was his life and he wasn’t allowed to require, or even  _ want _ anything more than this for himself. 

But he had. He had wanted more and last night he’d taken it, breaking every rule and shattering every boundary that had been drilled into his psyche since his inception. And Maker help him, he didn’t regret it. But although he didn’t regret it, a part of him was still scared,  _ terrified  _ actually, that he hadn’t thought things through, that he had no karking idea where to go from here. But most of all he feared that his decision would bring nothing but trouble for both of them and he didn’t want that for Ahsoka. The convoluted politics of his... _ complicated _ ...existence had no place in her life and he didn’t want it to affect her in any way. 

He shook these thoughts from his mind. There was nothing he could do about it now; the decision had been made and he was safe for the moment, locked in her arms and in a  _ very _ pleasing position.  _ Hm _ , he thought as a smile began to tug at the corner of his mouth,  _ maybe I can’t improve my performance from last night, but maybe I can make up for it this morning… _

He began to shift his body, turning ever so slowly towards her. Her hand slid from his hip and her arm began to fall from his chest. He wrapped his own arms around her, one low on her waist and the other around her shoulders as he tempted her in closer so that she was pressed against his body, her chest squished against his own. He pressed his lips softly to her cheek, hoping his chapped skin wouldn’t scratch her own. He kissed a delicate line across her jaw and then down, mouth open now and leaving a wet trail to mark his path. He felt her pulse racing and he lightly nipped her neck, relishing the sensation of feeling her heartbeat under his teeth. She gasped but her eyes remained closed as he continued on to her shoulders. 

“Are you awake, mesh’la?” he rumbled against her from somewhere just behind her lek. He felt her breathing increase but she made no other sound. “Hm...maybe you want some...encouragement...to wake up.” He nipped her shoulder, a little harder than he probably should have, but it had the desired effect, causing her to shiver and reward him with a soft moan. “Is that what you need? A little encouragement?” His hand on her lower back crept further down to cup her ass and squeezed, before pulling her tighter against him. She whimpered and he could feel her nod against him but her eyes remained obstinately closed.

He smiled against her collarbone before continuing his teasing path down her body. He kissed her lek, his tongue tracing the deep pulsing vein that ran along the underside all the way to the tip. He was on top of her now, and her hands had come up to grip his shoulders. He sucked the tip of her lek into his mouth and her fingers spasmed, her nails leaving tiny crescent shaped marks in his flesh. He hissed in pleasure and sucked a little harder, one of his hands sliding across her stomach, tickling the top of her hip.

Her breathing was shallow and fast now, her stomach clenching with each slow and teasing pass of his fingers. He released her lek from his mouth and dropped his head to her chest. Her noise of frustration at his abandonment of her lek was swiftly replaced with a gasp of approval as his mouth found her nipple. She arched her back, silently begging for more and he moaned his own need into her skin. The hand that had been idly caressing her hip was moving deliberately inwards, unhurried and tantalizing. His mouth and tongue were still focused on her breast but he felt her spread her legs wide for him, an open invitation for him to proceed with whatever his intentions were.

He grazed her nipple with his teeth, eliciting a wanton moan from her lips. He fought the urge to concede all of the ground he’d gained and rush back up her body to drink in her sounds with a kiss. Instead, he continued his meandering path down with tongue, lips and teeth, so near his goal. He nipped her hip then soothed the mark with his tongue. Her whole body shook and she spread even further for him. He kissed his way around her thigh, his cock throbbing now that he could smell her musky but sweet arousal.

He was laying down flat on his stomach between her legs now, the sight and scent more glorious than he could have ever imagined. His eyes found her own, now open and pleading with him wordlessly to continue. He nodded and dipped his head back down, ready to drown in the sensation of her. His tongue charged forward to lick along her folds and she shuddered, her head dropping back onto the forest floor heavily. That was all the encouragement he needed.

He eagerly dove in. He had never done this before and he had no clue in the galaxy as to what he was doing, but his only goal right now was to please her and he was determined to succeed. He focused on every little noise or movement she made, adapting and learning. Her hand had come down to rest on the back of his head, pulling him in further and encouraging him to keep going. 

Remembering what she liked with his fingers, he modified that knowledge to his tongue, circling her clit firmly and then sucking on it. He brought one of his hands up to join his mouth, his fingers now thrusting in and out of her as his tongue simultaneously drove her closer to the edge.

He could feel her trembling around him, his name tumbling from her lips. Her legs began to creep up to box his face in and he knew she was close. His fingers sped up their rhythm and his tongue sucked hard on her clit and he felt her snap. Her whole body convulsed, her fingers grasping at his head, trying to find hairs long enough to hold on to, something to ground herself, as she shattered around him. He let her juices run into his mouth, drinking them down, a taste sweeter than Soulean brandy and he couldn’t get enough. He worked her through her climax, soaking in every second of it with her and enjoying it maybe nearly as much.

He could feel her hand at his head coaxing him out as she continued to shudder but now from overstimulation, he realized. He kissed the inside of her thigh, causing her leg to twitch before making his way back up her body to take in her flushed face. He knew without a doubt it was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen, or likely ever would see, in his life. 

“Good morning, cyare.” He sucked in a sharp breath, realizing belatedly what he’d just said. She blinked at him, her look confused and unsure for a moment. He was just lining up his explanation and apology for his slip of the tongue when she responded, saving him the trouble. 

“Good morning, cyar’ika.” His heart stopped beating for a moment. She hadn’t taken it quite as far as he had but it was very close. She hadn’t  _ had _ to say that although he did put her in an awkward position when he’d said cyare like a complete di’kut. He decided not to ponder it further right now. He leaned down and kissed her tenderly, letting her feel his sincerity. When they finally broke apart, she tugged him back down to the forest floor and she curled back into him, nuzzling in to find a comfortable spot against the hard muscles of his chest.

“I like it when you speak Mando’a,” Ahsoka said conversationally. 

“Oh you do? I like it when you speak Mando’a too. It’s, uh -” he stopped himself, afraid he was going too far again.

She looked up at him, cocking her head the tiniest bit. “It's what?”

He cleared his throat in an effort to get the words out confidently, “It’s, um, well it’s really sexy when you speak Mando’a.” He had a very strong suspicion that he was blushing. For some reason declaring that it was hot when she spoke his native language was more embarrassing to him than anything they’d done. Maybe just because this felt like a regular conversation and not something charged and heated. Either way, he wished his cheeks would stop burning or that she’d stop looking at them until he got his body back under control.

A smile spread across her lips. “You think it’s sexy when I speak Mando’a?”

He swallowed thickly. “Yes.”

Her smile grew mischievously. “I know a few more words. Want to hear them?” She had propped herself up on her side, her head resting in her hand as her elbow supported her weight. His eyes were drawn to her neck, her chest and then further down. She was positioning herself so that her body was on full display for him and it was impossible to look away.

“Yes. If you want to-”

"Oh, I'd love to." That glint was back in her eyes again and he had the distinct feeling that he might get more than he bargained for with this. 

She raised herself up further, his eyes drawn down like a magnet to her sex as she moved to straddle him. He felt her sticky wetness on his cock as she settled on top of it, not yet inside of her, but so, so close. He nearly whimpered at the contact and what it might lead to, not even close to as embarrassed as he should be by that sound and its neediness. She leaned across him, her whole body now laying on top of his and her head nestled in the crook of his neck.

One of her hands slid down his arm to entwine with his. “Gaan.” 

He smiled. It was a really sweet gesture and her pronunciation was almost perfect. He tugged her hand up to his lips and kissed it. “Gaan.”

She returned his smile before tilting her head to the side and poking her tongue out to lick up his neck. “Lalat.” He tipped his head back for her and her tongue swirled up further, tracing his strong jaw before teasing his ear. “Edeemir,” she whispered as her teeth nibbled on his ear.

He was breathing hard now, having figured out her game but still unsure how much Mando’a she actually knew or how far she’d want to take it. 

Her hands slid back up to brush along his muscled stomach. “Dral, kotep.” She kissed his chest. “Cabur.” Another kiss just a bit further down. Her teeth grazed along his right nipple, eliciting a gasp from him. “Edee.” 

She was making her way over to the left one when she stopped at his heart, thinking hard. “Kar’ta.” She reached for his hand again and brought it up to her chest just above her left breast, “kar’taylir.”

He didn’t want to interrupt her, didn’t want her to stop, but he had to kiss her  _ right now _ . It was as necessary as the oxygen in his lungs and just as urgent in this moment. One of his hands dipped under her lek to cradle her neck as he guided her in closer, deepening the kiss. When they finally broke apart to breathe he repeated, “kar’taylir.”

She smiled gently and coaxed him to lay down flat on the ground on his back once more as she assumed her previous position, only this time she straddled his hip. Her hands ran up and down his sides, tickling his ribs and tracing his abs. “Baar.”

She slid her body down his leg, her hands following, landing on his hips. “Kandosii’la.” Her hands lingered there for a few beats before one of them slid further and curled around his hard and throbbing cock. She wrapped her slender fingers around it gently, barely touching, and his whole body jerked at the contact, his hips thrusting up without conscious thought. He quickly reined himself in, whole body pulsing and on fire, but as still as he could make himself now beneath her, waiting for her next move. He noticed her breathing was nearly as heavy as his own.

“Cetar.” She maneuvered herself between his legs, one her hands still on him and the other on his hip but sliding slowly inwards. She leaned forward, her breath softly gusting over the leaking head and dragging up a filthy moan from somewhere deep inside the very core of him. 

“Copad.” She closed the distance between her mouth and his tense and shaking body, pressing her lips to the very tip of his aching need. It was soft and featherlight, nearly the ghost of a sensation, but at the same time it was almost too much. “Mureyca.” His hands were twitching at his sides, yearning to jump forward and beg her head to stay exactly where it was for just one more second. He felt like that’s all it would have taken for him to come apart at this point. To shatter in the best way into a billion pieces at her words and her touch.

But she had moved away, really just a centimeter or two but it may as well have been the distance between him and the next galaxy. He watched her tongue dart out to taste his precum and he moaned again. This was the definition of torture, only there was pleasure involved in the spaces between. Her tongue ran along her lips a second time to ensure they were clean. “Jatisyc.” 

Her eyes caught his and it was like staring directly into a star, so bright and mesmerizing and hot and intense it was impossible to look away. “B’Alor’ad.” 

Her head came forward and his dropped back, hitting the ground as solidly as a newly blasted commando droid. Her lips wrapped around him and he was lost.

Her movements were slow and hesitant at first, learning what he liked, just as he’d done with her. He was not shy about encouraging her with noises and reactions, hell he couldn’t have stopped them if he’d tried. She soon gained confidence and found a rhythm that had him fighting the urge to thrust hard and fast into the wet heat of her mouth. He knew this wasn’t going to take long and he fervently hoped she wasn’t looking for a lengthy encounter here. She took him all the way in and he felt his engorged and swollen length begin to pulse, full and desperate for release.

“Gedet’ye,  _ gedet’ye _ …”

He felt her hum around him, the sensation running up his length, and this time he did thrust, unable to hold back. A really embarrassing sound that might have been anything from a whimper to a growl or maybe everything in between was ripped from his lips. His hands came up to grip her montrals probably a little harder than they should have, in an effort to halt her movements. He was using every ounce of self control he had to hold himself still inside of her. 

“Ke’pare! So close ‘Soka. Vaii - where...where should I -”

“Me’copaani, Alor’ad?” She hummed around him wickedly. She resumed her ministrations while she waited for his answer, one hand still on his hip and the other now on his gett’se, rolling them in her hand and running her fingers along the sensitive area just behind. He moaned again, long and wrecked and barely hanging on by a thread to the rapidly fraying rope of control.

“O’r…” She took him in all the way again and he didn’t even finish his sentence, his hips bucking up, his balls slapping her chin obscenely once, twice, three times, before he exploded down her throat with a groan thinged with relief, ecstasy and that hint of failure. 

He wasn’t sure if this was what she intended, but there was no taking it back now. Hot ropes of his shame and pleasure in equal parts spurted out in thick strands to paint the roof of her mouth. Her eyes were closed and he watched her throat constrict and expand and constrict again as she swallowed down his release. Maker help him, that did nothing but spur him on, copious amounts of his climax now dripping down her chin even as she struggled to take it all in. He ripped his eyes from the sight, his head falling heavily back to slam on the ground once more as he began to very slowly come down from his high.

It felt like a long time before he could breathe right again, like an eternity before his heart beat returned to normal and he was able to speak again. He could feel her still kneeling between his legs, one of her hands still on his hip. He sat up. She was wiping her chin curiously and watching him with a shy smile adorning her lips.

“Ni ceta…ni ceta...I - I’m so sorry.”

She cocked her head to the side and her eyebrow markings furrowed in confusion. “Tion’jor?”

He smiled at her continued use of Mando’a. “I just...just um, you know,  _ finished  _ and I didn’t know if you would, I mean, I wasn’t sure if…”

She smiled again. “That was  _ perfect, _ Rex. You don’t need to apologize.” She nestled in against him and he held her there, feeling confused but fortunate to have her by his side. He layed back down and tugged her down with him, her lithe body comfortably draped along his own with her leg entwined across his hip.

He sighed, relief and contentment like he’d never felt before washing over him in gentle soothing waves. The feeling was one he couldn’t ever remember experiencing before and he permitted himself to enjoy it while it lasted.

**Ahsoka’s POV**

What a nice morning this was turning out to be. Rex was actually  _ relaxing _ with his arm around her, a sight that she wished she could take a holo of and show to all of his brothers in the 501st so they’d believe he was capable of cutting loose and letting his guard down once in a while. 

As soon as that thought flitted across her mind, it died with the realization that she’d never be able to do that. She wrapped her arm around his chest and pulled him in just that tiny bit closer, treasuring his contented sigh as she did so.

All of a sudden, part of her didn’t want to build the communicator. Not anytime soon anyway. If she succeeded, they’d be rescued and taken back to Coruscant and moments like these would be lost to her. Maybe her Jedi duties would keep them apart. Maybe they’d return and he’d jump right back into leading his men on dangerous missions. Maybe there would come that one mission where he wouldn’t make it back. 

She shook those weighty and poisonous thoughts away. There was no need to focus on what  _ might _ happen in the future and risk missing all of the positive things in her here and now. 

She felt safe here with him, totally at ease, content and happy in a way she’d never experienced before. But she knew they couldn’t stay here, that they really  _ should _ get back. Frankly, she was surprised that Anakin hadn’t found a way to track them down yet, as determined and resourceful as he was. 

She looked up at Rex. His eyes were closed and he looked so at peace. She’d never seen him like this before and as she looked at him like that, she tried to memorize his face, golden eyes hidden beneath heavy lids with his long eyelashes guarding their secrets, his long nose, nostrils barely moving as he inhaled the sweet mid-morning breeze and most of all his mouth, his plush lips so often turned down in a frown now turned up in a lazy and unburdened smile. She carved that look into her heart so that she’d remember it forever.

She shifted her hands so that they tiptoed across his stomach and landed on his side, just over his ribs. He twitched and reached up to gently grip her wrists. He spoke without even cracking his eyes open. “Hm, that tickles.”

She smiled. “Sorry Rexster. I wanted to do something that I’ve been trying to do since our first day here.”

He chuckled at that. “Didn’t we just do that?”

She returned his laugh, her smile stretching impossibly wider at this new light and playful side of him. She’d never seen him like this before and she was really enjoying it. “Ha ha ha. Don’t get too excited. No, this is something different and maybe not quite as enjoyable. But you’ll appreciate it all the same, I think. You’ll need to hold still though.” 

“No problem. As long as you don’t tickle me again.”

She chuckled. “Got it.” He released her wrists and she moved her hands back to their previous position over his ribs, her movements firmer this time to keep from making his body jump. 

Once she was directly over his ribs, she closed her eyes and concentrated, reaching out with the Force to feel his skin, his tissues, veins and finally bones. She could see them all as patterns of energy beneath her fingertips and she reached out to touch them. She began to knit him back together as she had done to herself, feeling every fragment of bone and sinew of skin and making sure the transitions were seamless and smooth. She labored slowly, diligently, unwilling to slip up and make any mistakes. 

As she worked, she noticed that something didn’t feel right. There was a pulse in the patterns of the Force, like ripples of water spreading out and searching for something. She tried to ignore it, but it was impossible. It was insistent and strong, thrumming across the air around her and soaking into her hands as she moved. She could vaguely feel the drop of sweat meandering down her temple.

She worked for what felt like a full rotation. His ribs were in much worse shape than hers had been and she was surprised he’d made it this long without doubling over in pain. The disturbance in the Force was stronger now, a familiar hum singing along her skin. It wasn’t unpleasant, but its presence caused her to break concentration more than once to ponder it, making her efforts more and more taxing. She could feel an army of sweat droplets now marching down her cheeks and dripping onto her hands. But she was almost finished and she ignored them. Her hands were shaking and she felt a firm and steady pressure on top of them. 

His own hands. She understood his gesture. He was offering her his support, strength, and energy. She drew on his gifts, tugging just a bit of it into her through the Force and her hands stopped shaking. She moved along his skin, renewed and strong again at least for a time as she threaded the final pieces together.

When she was finally done, she opened her eyes to find him looking at her with concern. “All done.” Her voice was unsteady, the words weaker than they should have been.

“Ahsoka, are you ok?”

Her eyes were so heavy and she wanted to close them but she kept them open and focused on his instead. “M’fine.”

“You are definitely not fine, Ahsoka. What do you need? How can I help?”

“I promise, m’fine. Just need to rest a little…”

“Can you take some of my energy? Will that help?”

Her smile this time was sleepy but genuine. “I  _ promise _ Rex, I’ll be fine.” She curled up against him again and closed her eyes. Healing him had taken much more out of her than it should have. That disturbance in the Force that had kept drawing her concentration as she’d worked, forcing her to go over areas that she’d already done to make sure she’d done them right. 

She’d never really felt anything like that before and she yearned to figure it out, but her eyelids were just too heavy and she was much too tired. She allowed her eyes to close, feeling Rex tense against her, unsure of what to do or how to help her. She wanted to reassure him, but she had no energy in her reserves anymore and all she could manage was a small smile before sleep overtook her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love to hear your thoughts and comments! Looking forward to seeing what you all thought of this chapter 🥰


	7. Day 7 - The Rescue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, Rex and Ahsoka are rescued! The only problem is that things don't go quite how they'd hoped...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Star Wars or any of it's characters.
> 
> Sushifish is absolutely the BEST. Thank you friend, as always for looking this over for me and giving me your honest opinion on the story and the characters so far!
> 
> A HUGE thank you to Chromia for their incredibly beautiful artwork inspired by this story. I might be more in love with it than Rex is with Ahsoka, and that's saying a lot... I truly can't say enough good things about it. It's just...everything💗💗💗

****

**Ahsoka’s POV**

She awoke to a gentle hand tentatively nudging her shoulder, rocking it slightly back and forth. She wasn't ready to wake up yet. She snuggled back in, wrapping her arms tighter around something that felt a lot like firm and unyielding plastiod. She heard a sharp intake of breath. 

Why would he have put his armor back on? They'd been so comfortable lying naked and curled around each other. Maybe he'd put it on before he'd fallen asleep beside her? Well, if that was the case, she was going to let him know what she thought about that. 

"Mmm, you know Rex, this is much more comfortable without our clothes on, don't you think?"

She heard someone that _definitely_ wasn't Rex clear their throat loudly and awkwardly. "Uh...Sir?…I - I don’t think - "

Her eyes shot open and her arms snapped back to her sides so quickly it felt like she’d been electrocuted. She found herself staring into a pair of golden eyes maybe wider and more panicked than she knew that her own were right now. She blinked and looked around wildly. She was back on Coruscant, in the med bay, mercifully alone save for Kix who was swallowing thickly and seemingly still at a loss for words from her last incriminating statement. She was dressed, thank the Maker, and in a cot with a blanket over her. Rex was nowhere in sight.

She forced herself to meet Kix’s startled eyes, trying and failing to keep the heat from rising in her cheeks. “Um, hello Kix…”

“H-hello Sir.” 

Silence. 

Oh boy had she started off on the right foot…

“Kix...I, uh, I’m, um sorry about that...It was a dream, and uh, well…”

Kix swallowed again and she watched the tight lump in his throat bob up and down before he was able to speak. He rubbed the back of his neck, a gesture he was known to do when he was very nervous or uncomfortable. Well, she couldn’t blame him, she felt the same way. “Um, Sir, I, well - it’s none of my business really…” he trailed off awkwardly, clearly not knowing how to navigate his CO hugging him around the middle and telling him she preferred his other CO laying with her naked.

She cleared her throat and made a brave attempt to bring the conversation back around to something they were both able to deal with. “Okay Kix, um, can you please fill me in on what I’ve missed since I was asleep? I must have been out for awhile. The last thing I remember was…” now she trailed off. The last thing she remembered was nuzzling into the warm heat of Rex’s hard chest and falling into a deep and pleasant asleep. She obviously couldn’t say that. “Well, um, the last thing I remember was using the Force to, um, heal Rex…” Why did her cheeks have to go red now? Why? “It...uh...it took a lot out of me…” Her whole face was on fire, she could just _feel_ it, and Kix’s eyes told her she was right as they darted away from hers respectfully, his own cheeks coloring in the face of all of this overwhelming awkwardness. “Um, then I fell asleep…” She wasn’t doing anything but digging a bigger hole to bury herself in with each word. “And then I woke up here,” she finished lamely.

Kix was trying his level best to remain professional and to ignore every implication on display like a neon sign in her words. She had to admire the effort even if he wasn’t wholly succeeding. He cleared his throat, but his voice remained tight and tense when he next spoke. “Sir, you don’t have to explain yourself to me. I don’t know much. General Skywalker had been looking for you since your ship was damaged and you went into hyperspace, but he had a hard time tracking you down. I’m not sure how he eventually found you but he did, so we loaded up right away to ship out and bring you back to base.”

“And how’s Rex? Where is he? Is he ok?”

“The Captain is fine. He was discharged almost as soon as he was brought in. But you...you were pretty out of it so we kept you here -”

“Wait - how long have I been here?”

“Since this morning. You’ll need to stay overnight so we can run a few more tests and make sure -”

“I’m fine, Kix.” She swung a leg over the edge of the cot. “I was just tired. I want to go see -”

Kix stopped her with a gentle but firm hand on her shoulder. “Commander, you need to stay overnight. General Skywalker’s orders. I’m sure he’ll be by to see you soon anyway. He’s barely left your side since you’ve been back.”

Did he mean Anakin or Rex? Probably he meant Anakin.

She pursed her lips in a pout and bit her tongue, almost choking on all of the questions she wanted to ask right now but knew she shouldn’t. She allowed herself to be guided back down to a comfortable position on the cot. She felt restless and full of adrenaline, her body as jumpy as her mind, and sitting still was the absolute last thing she wanted to be doing. Kix was insistent though and honestly part of her didn’t want to make things any more strained by disobeying his recommendations just now.

Once he was convinced she was going to stay put, he input some information into the datpad that had been latched on his belt, and stood to leave. She was biting her bottom lip, her mind working furiously. She could say nothing, just let him go and hope her earlier outburst didn’t come back to haunt her and Rex, or she could say something. He was turning around and the words burst from her before her brain had concluded if it was a good idea or not.

“Kix, wait! Um...about what I said earlier…”

He stopped and even through the plastoid she could see the tension infusing and overtaking his limbs as he stiffened. His voice was even when he spoke and it gave her no real clue as to the sincerity of his words. “As I said, Sir, it’s really none of my business…”

“Kix please. It was just a dream and I don’t want anyone to get in trouble because I said something crazy and stupid while I was out of it…”

He was still standing perfectly still. More beats passed than she could count. She was just opening her mouth to say more when he turned his head just slightly over his shoulder. She couldn’t see much of his face, but she could see enough to know that he was being truthful when he replied. “I understand, Sir.”

“So...you won’t say anything?”

“No, I won’t.” She could see some inner struggle dancing behind the limited profile she had of his irises. He sighed softly. “But, Sir...you should be careful.” He turned around fully to face her and she could see the indecision flashing across his eyes even as he spoke. “Some of the guys here…” he broke off for a moment, choosing his words carefully. “Well, let’s just say some of the men might have, um, read more into what you said than I will. Just...just be careful.” And without waiting for a reply and looking decidedly anxious to disentangle himself from this situation, he turned on his heel and walked out of the med bay.

Alone with her thoughts, she poured over what he’d said. 

_Some of the men might have read more into what you said_ …

Well, that was a pretty self-explanatory but terrifying thought all at the same time. She was already missing having Rex by her side and now that she was back in Coruscant, would she lose those times for good? She didn’t want Rex to get in trouble. Well, she didn’t want _anyone_ to get in trouble, but she didn’t want to give up this special thing that they had found together either. Part of her wasn’t even sure she could if she were asked to. 

But where did that leave them? She had her room in the Jedi Temple which he wasn’t allowed to enter and he had his Captain’s quarters in the barracks, which she could enter but where she’d be seen by probably the entire 501st. Their rooms on the _Resolute_ were closer but still bordered by Jedi and troopers. Were their moments alone now going to be nothing more than sneaking around and stealing kisses in a supply closet when they could? And what did he even want? What was he thinking about all of this?

Her head was spinning and the pounding of a headache was beginning in her temples, but for all that, she didn’t have any more answers than when she began her hurried introspections. She bit her lip, mind still racing over all that had happened recently. She searched her memories and summoned one of her favorites from last night: Rex laying contentedly on his back, her arm draped over his stomach, his closed eyes and peaceful breathing and that charming and easy half smile softening his lips. The picture was so clear and it tugged a smile across her own lips. She was sure he felt the same special connection that she did. But would he be willing to risk so much to keep it? She knew she was. She was willing to be careful, to be discreet, to take what she could get when she could get it if that was all she could do right now. But there were so many risks involved now that they were home. And Kix already knew. 

While she trusted Kix and she could tell that he meant his words to her a few moments ago, it was a well-known fact that the 501st wasn’t famous for keeping secrets. Maybe the exact opposite. They were known for being more outspoken than the other companies and in this situation, that was not a good thing. She didn’t think Kix would talk but the truth of the matter was that she hadn’t been home a full rotation yet and she’d already made a serious misstep. The risks were real and dangerous and while she was willing to learn from this and do better in an effort to hold onto that wonderful thing that they’d found, she wondered.

She wondered how much he was willing to risk and if he felt the same.

**Rex’s POV**

He couldn’t stop pacing. He’s been doing it almost non-stop since he got back to his quarters and he wouldn’t be surprised if there were actual tracks in the floor where his leaden boots had carved them into the surface. He sighed. He wanted to see her, wanted to make sure she was ok, but he just _couldn’t_. 

In the past, if she’d been injured he’d have stopped by the med bay occasionally, or followed up with General Skywalker on her condition. He’d already been there two times today to check on her and his multiple trips to the med bay were starting to raise some eyebrows among his men. And Kix… well, when he’d visited the last time before he’d holed himself up here in his room, Kix had given him this look. A look like he suspected something and that had terrified Rex so badly that he’d stayed away since then.

It felt a little cowardly and a little like the best chance at self-preservation he had right now. He continued to pace, reflecting on all of the things that had happened in the last rotation. 

They had been resting on that strange planet, He hadn’t moved in what felt like hours, his body tense and his arm stiff under Ahsoka’s head, but she’d been sleeping peacefully and he had been worried about her. She had just healed him using the Force, but it had cost her, her body limp and heavy and so worn out while he’d had no clue what to do to help. So he had laid there, not moving, letting her recuperate at her own pace and hoping that she was alright. 

The sun had dipped below the horizon, the sky dark and clear and the woods surrounding them so quiet he could hear his own breathing. That’s when he’d seen it, lights not far in the distance, descending from the sky at a rapid rate, the distinct powering down of an engine ringing in his ears and jarring him fully awake and alert. It was a ship. It was _the Resolute_.

He’d panicked a little at the sight, his brain overcrowded and sputtering with too many thoughts and emotions to cope with in that instant. 

He was happy to see the _Resolute_ and looking forward to seeing his friends again. He was sad to see the _Resolute_ knowing that he would have to say goodbye to the peace that he’d so recently found. He was naked. _Ahsoka_ was naked. Where were her clothes? _Where the fuck_ _was his armor?_ He shook her but was unable to wake her. He could hear them coming as his fingers fumbled the zips and clasps of her battledress. He couldn’t find one of her boots...Ah, thank the fucking Maker, there it is! He wasn’t gentle but he got the job done. Well, almost. The tights never made it on. He threw them as far as he could and they landed just shy of the stream. He yanked on his blacks and sealed them in place just as his brothers, led by General Skywalker burst into the clearing to face him.

They were being rescued.

He was out of breath and they were all staring at him in his blacks, no armor, no weapons and his chest heaving and Ahsoka asleep with no tights. 

He remembered thinking that this might be an execution instead of a rescue. 

But he was luckier than he’d deserved. They’d let him explain and he’d told them Ahsoka had used the Force to heal his wounds and then she’d fallen asleep and he’d been unable to wake her. He said she was washing her tights in the stream, which at least somewhat jived with reality since they had landed near the stream when he’d thrown them not seconds ago. He explained there had been no hostiles on this planet so he’d opted to sleep in his blacks. There was just no good explanation for that or for the fact that his weapons lay in an untidy pile with his armor fairly far from where he was standing. But strength of character took him a long way and they had all let those odd and uncharacteristic, not to mention highly _unlikely_ , decisions slide, opting instead to believe him and not shoot him down where he stood like he probably deserved. 

He’d adorned his armor and weapons, watching Anakin carry Ahsoka onto the _Resolute_ , looking down at her with concern. He could feel more than one pair of eyes watching him suspiciously as he snapped his armor back into place. He’d wondered what they were thinking and then he shoved that thought away, _knowing_ what they were probably thinking. Once he was kitted up again, he’d boarded the _Resolute_ and they’d headed home. 

The toe of his boot bumped the floor as he paced and he tripped, his armor banging into his desk and leaving a small dent in the plastoid. That successfully halted his pacing and his line of thought. Temporarily at least.

He sighed. He looked at his wrist-comm. It was 2344. He should be sleeping, but he wasn’t tired. He _really_ wanted to check on Ahsoka although he knew he shouldn’t. He frowned as an idea wormed its way into his brain and then poked at him obstinately. It was really late - Kix was likely back in his bunk by now and the med bay should be deserted. Maybe he could…

He shouldn’t. He knew he shouldn’t.

He stepped towards his door and out into the deserted hallways of the bunkhouse. All was quiet until he passed the common area where he heard a few voices; some of his brothers still up finishing a game of Sabaac. He walked along slowly and cautiously, alert to all movement around him but he needn't have worried. After the common area he neither saw nor heard anyone. He looked around once more but all of the corridors were as deserted as before. He opened the door to the med bay and stepped inside. 

It was dark and hard to see. He’d left his helmet back in his room and he almost wished he’d brought it; the night vision would have come in handy. He gave his eyes a moment to adjust and scanned the room. All of the cots were empty save for one towards the back. He hadn’t even made it halfway there before the shape on the cot sat up and looked around, locking a pair of vivid blue eyes with his golden ones. 

“Rex?” She whispered.

His steps became long, his pace just a tiny bit faster as he made his way to her. “Yeah, it’s me. How are you feeling? Are you okay?” From what he could see in the darkness, she looked fine. She looked alert and energetic, just like she always did, no signs of her previous fatigue showing on her face or in her posture. He was immediately relieved even though she hadn’t answered him yet.

She smiled. “I’m fine. In fact, I’m much better now that you’re here.” Her hand found his in the dark and she entwined her fingers with his own. The warmth that filled his heart was immediate and almost overwhelming. He let it settle there and he returned her smile, cocking up the left side of his mouth as he met her gaze. She continued, “Are you ok? I don’t remember much after I fell asleep. I woke up here in the med bay -” She cut herself off hard and he had opened his mouth to encourage her to finish her sentence when she picked up her thread of thought in a different place and continued. “I don’t remember how we got here.”

He didn’t want to, but she deserved to know, so he swallowed his shame and embarrassment, the color rising mockingly in his cheeks as he recounted for her what had happened. As much as it pained him to do so, he left nothing out, his full humiliation shining brightly in front of her, in the spotlight and refusing to be ignored in the telling. She listened attentively without interrupting him and her countenance betraying nothing of her opinions. He was grateful for that. Maker knew it was hard enough to get through it as it was. When he was finished he waited patiently for her judgement.

She squeezed his hand. “You did the best you could. It was my fault really. I decided to heal you and actually it was my idea to return your...um…’good morning’. And there was no way to know that we’d be rescued.”

“Well, it was my idea to show you a ‘good morning’ in the first place though so...”

Her smile widened and then faltered, sloping down into a thoughtful frown. “Rex, I made a mistake earlier...a big mistake...when I first woke up here in the med bay…” His stomach plummeted and his adrenaline automatically started pumping through his veins. He didn’t yet know what she planned to divulge but his body was getting a jump start on the nervousness and anxiety that he was sure he’d have reason to feel in a moment.

He swallowed, trying to bring some moisture back into his throat before he spoke. “I’m sure it’s nothing too bad…” He trailed off as he watched her bite her bottom lip and her eyes broke free of his. Oh fuck, this might be bad.

As she explained to him what had happened earlier with Kix, his stomach flipped and dove so many times it felt like he’d swallowed a Rokarian dirt-fish and he thought he might be sick. Of all of his brothers, he supposed Kix might be better than most. He generally stayed out of the drama and gossip propagated by the rest of the 501st. Thank the Maker it hadn’t been Fives. If that had been the case, the entire GAR would have already known and one of the Generals, probably General Skywalker, would have marched in here an hour ago and chopped off his gett’se. 

Even though getting his gett’se chopped off was still a very real possibility, he met her eyes and answered honestly. “It’s okay. I don’t think Kix will say anything and either way, it couldn’t have been helped. You didn’t know and really the moral of the story here is that we should have just put some clothes on.”

She huffed out a laugh at that. “Aw, now where would the fun have been in that?” she teased, feeling a bit better since he’d attempted to joke about it.

“Maybe not so much fun as self-preservation.”

“Oh I see. Point taken, Captain.”

His hand squeezed hers involuntarily at the use of his rank. She hadn’t meant it in a sexual way, not at all, but their conversation had already reminded him of _why_ they hadn’t had clothes on and the last time she’d called him Captain. Frankly, it was shameful what that one word did to his body as it crossed the threshold of her lips. He was both discomfited and eager at the same time to see that she’d correctly read his expression and reaction to her choice of words.

“You really like that, don’t you? When I call you Captain?”

There was no point in lying. “Yes.”

“ _Alor’ad_.”

“Ahsoka...don’t.”

“Don’t what?” She cocked her head to the side playfully. “We’re alone. It’s the middle of the night and there’s no one in here but us.” She tugged him down as she sat up straighter. He should resist, he knew he should, but he didn’t want to. What was the harm in one little kiss? She leaned up, her lips ghosting along his jaw, the soft skin tickling the stubble he hadn’t yet had a chance to shave. Her breath mingled with his own as she hoisted her body up higher, but she didn’t close that last centimeter of distance between them. She was letting him make the call.

“We shouldn’t,” he breathed quietly. As he spoke his lips brushed hers, the merest touch of skin on skin and he nearly moaned at the sensation.

“You’re probably right,” she acknowledged just as softly, lips again teasing temptingly across his own, the barest scrape of a connection.

_Ah, fuck it._

He jumped across the chasm that separated them, that wicked centimeter crushed between his hungry mouth and hers. He dominated the kiss, his tongue immediately initiating an almost frantic dance with hers. She seemed just as ravenous as he was, coaxing his tongue into her mouth and sucking on it. He moaned into her mouth at that, the sound swallowed down her throat just as another was rising in his.

His hand released hers in favor of sweeping the blanket aside and wrapping around her waist. His other hand landed on the cot near her head as he moved to hover above her. He jerked her body up, her back arching as she felt the press of his codpiece against her. As her needy whimper permeated the air around him, he rubbed against her, fervently wishing he wasn’t in his armor. 

“Is this what you were after, mesh’la?”

She nodded and he watched her swallow, her heart pulsing in her throat as he dipped his head to taste it with his teeth. Her answering moan was nearly his undoing. He slid his cod along her, yearning to rip off that piece of armor and fling it across the room so that he could feel her around him again.

“Yes...B’Alor’ad…”

His head fell heavily into the crook of her shoulder and he sucked the skin there hard to stifle his groan of desire at her words. As he sucked her skin into his mouth he could feel her hot breath on his head, the pounding of her heart in his jaws as it beat in time with his own. 

He reached his fingers down in between them to find her wet and ready for him. His fingers quickly found their rhythm and he watched her writhe and squirm in pleasure beneath him, the sounds rushing from her mouth in a flood doing nothing but exacerbating his burning desire to bring her to completion. She was clenching around him, heat and wetness drenching his fingers and he knew she was close. So fucking close. As close as he was without her even touching him. 

And then he heard the door open. 

He’d never moved so fast in his life, and that included just yesterday when he’d fumbled around like a battle droid with its head blasted off scrambling to find their clothes before the rescue party reached them. There was really nowhere to go, no way to exit the med bay other than the door that had just opened to admit someone. He rolled as quietly as he could manage under the cot. Ahsoka yanked the blanket up to cover herself just as he tugged part of it back down to help disguise his painfully obvious hiding place.

“Snips, I’m so glad to see you’re finally up!” The voice was mercifully still far away down by the entrance to the med bay, but there was no mistaking who it was. He’d know the voice of General Skywalker anywhere. He may as well say goodbye to his gett’se now. Maybe...just _maybe_ it wouldn’t have been too much to hope that one of his brothers would have missed the wildly flailing limbs and the distinct sound of plastoid hitting a durasteel floor. Maybe a brother that had been hit in the head one too many times by a commando droid, that is. But there was just no way, no karking way, that a Jedi could have missed it.

He heard the cot squeak as Ahsoka sat up straighter. The blanket shifted, leaving a larger gap exposing more of him to General Skywalker’s view should he choose to look down. He resisted the strong urge to curse.

“I just woke up not too long ago. Kix told me you might be by to see me, so I tried to stay up. It’s so good to see you!” He had to give her credit. Her voice betrayed no hint of the tension, anxiety and probably a hundred other emotions he was sure she must be feeling. And General Skywalker hadn’t yet mentioned him, hadn’t even looked down. It was really too much to hope that he hadn’t been discovered in his very conspicuous hiding place. And yet that seemed to be exactly what was happening here. As the General chatted animatedly with Ahsoka, no one acknowledged his presence and he began to think that for the second time at least in one rotation, he was luckier than he deserved.

He turned his attention back into the conversation above him as he stared idly at General Skywalker’s boots. Ahsoka had just finished explaining for the second time tonight what had happened on that deserted planet, although leaving out all of the incriminating details that he knew were spliced into the story in reality.

“...and then I felt this disturbance in the Force as I was trying to heal him. It wasn’t like anything I’ve felt before. Not like we’ve sensed when Count Dooku is nearby or when someone is in danger. It was...different somehow. Like it was just probing or searching or...or testing or something. It’s hard to describe.”

He couldn’t see the general’s face, but he watched him shift his weight uneasily and when he next spoke, his words were slow and thoughtful. “I might be able to explain that. We had been searching for you and Rex for a long time. We’d charted literally every possible course your ship could have taken when you’d jumped to hyperspace and we’d already visited all but three possible locations. I had tried reaching out to you through the Force many times in my search hoping that would help lead me to you, but I hadn’t had any success, until the day we rescued you. That day I actually felt something. It was small, but it was there and it helped me hone in on your location. Maybe since you were so deeply surrounded by the Force as you healed Captain Rex we were able to connect in a way, even over that great distance.”

There was a silence after his words that stretched just long enough for Rex to begin to feel uncomfortable. Well, more uncomfortable that he already was that is. 

Ahsoka finally spoke and he could picture her face as clearly as if it were right in front of him, brow markings furrowed and eyes slightly narrowed, deep in thought. “You might be right, Master. That would make sense.”

Another silence while he supposed both of them pondered the veracity and merits of this theory.

The General was the one to break it this time. “Well, it’s late and I’d better let you get some sleep.”

“Thank you, I am pretty tired now that you mention it.”

He heard General Skywalker chuckle. “Yeah, I’m sure you are. Get some sleep, Snips. You’ll be out of here in the morning if all the tests come back negative, which I suspect they will.” 

“Thank you, Master.”

Rex watched the General’s scuffed and dusty boots turn and begin to stride the length of the med bay and towards to exit. He was no more than two steps away from crossing the threshold when he stopped. He didn’t turn around and instead directed his remarks over his shoulder to the room in general. “Oh, and Snips, if you see Captain Rex before I do, tell him I said welcome back.” His head slid back to face the exit and he proceeded the rest of the way out the door leaving Rex stuffed under the cot with his mouth hanging open and his mind racing at all of the implications hanging from that one short sentence.

Yep. He was most _definitely_ luckier than he deserved.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, we're nearing the end of the story now folks so I'm incredibly excited to hear what you think of this chapter 😁

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading :) I love knowing what you think so any comments are great!


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